


They Come To New York

by Papperchains



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Photographer, Dancer Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten, Drinking, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Getting Together, Happy Ending, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, LGBTQ Character, Light Angst, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, New York City, Original Character(s), Photographer Seo Youngho | Johnny, Slice of Life, Slow Burn, Strangers to Lovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-22
Updated: 2019-08-07
Packaged: 2020-06-10 01:35:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 65,568
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19488439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Papperchains/pseuds/Papperchains
Summary: When Johnny moved to New York City, he wasn't looking for much: inspiration, opportunity, a chance to find himself...What he wasn't expecting, was to fall headfirst into the life of a beautiful stranger.But sometimes, these things just happen.[Re-edited 2020]





	1. New York City

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! I'm back with a new fic. 
> 
> I've been working on this for a while now so I'm glad to finally start posting it! 
> 
> The quote at the beginning is from this post by the Photographer's Gallery on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/p/BwHU6I_DXUb/
> 
> This was pretty much the inspiration for the whole fic, and I would definitely recommend checking out the body of photography that went with it! 
> 
> Apologies for any spelling or grammatical errors ~
> 
> Enjoy!!
> 
> [Edit] 
> 
> I've finally gotten around to getting this fic betaed! So thank you so much to Teeg for being an amazing beta as always, and agreeing to help me out!! Any other mistakes are my own~~

_They come to New York City every week, more and more of them, in buses and trains and cars, carrying bags, carrying ambitions, carrying the fabulous clothes on their backs. They’re the fashion kids, the art kids, the theater kids, the who-knows-what kids—creative renegades of nineteen or twenty or twenty-five. They’ve heard what we’ve all heard: that downtown is dead, that the rent is too damn high, that someone has paved paradise and put up a Duane Reade. Still, they keep coming, against all odds, tricked out in spangles, torn shirts, and tattoos, seeking a place where they can find themselves, and each other._

Johnny stepped off the bus, legs stiff and body tired from the painfully long, twenty-two-hour journey. He hadn't gotten much sleep, half due to the excitement, and half because of the crowded vehicle. 

He yawned, stretching his long limbs and scratching his head — quickly lighting up a cigarette and inhaling deeply. 

Johnny looked around the bus station. It was early morning, but the city was already alive and bustling: yellow taxis sped past, office workers talked loudly over the phone, and the smell of greasy food was already poignant — Johnny's senses were overwhelmed.

He smiled to himself, letting a stream of smoke leave his mouth. 

New York City.

He had finally made it. 

Hoisting his duffle bag over his shoulder, Johnny stubbed out his (barely smoked) cigarette and walked out into the street, eager to get moving. In his well-worn jeans pocket, was the address of a cheap(ish) bedsit he had his heart set on. It was a shared property on the outskirts of downtown. It didn't promise much, no more than a roof over his head and a place to sleep, but that was all he needed. After all, it was the location he was more interested in — downtown was the perfect place to surround himself with inspiration and opportunity. A place to find himself. 

Identity had always been difficult for Johnny. Shadowed by his family's expectation, He had enrolled in law school — pushing his own dreams away to pursue something more respectable… However, instead of feeling good about making his family proud, Johnny had felt drained. College was quickly sucking the life out of him. 

By the end of the first year, he had easily fallen into the wrong crowd. Picking up his smoking habit (much to his mom’s distaste), and going out for weekend long benders. If he hadn't made the decision to drop out during the second year, Johnny wouldn't have been surprised if he’d been kicked out instead. 

This, doubled with his sexual identity crises, had left him feeling hollowed out. Trapped as the person he didn’t want to be, in a city that no longer felt like home. 

Truth be told, Johnny had always been more of an artistic type. 

His dad had gifted him his first camera at the age of twelve. It was a Canon AF35M, point and shoot film camera. Johnny had instantly fallen in love — shooting roll after roll of rather crap photographs. He fondly remembered rushing to the local film developers after school to collect his treasures — always being in awe of the prints that were handed back to him.

His parents had let him have his fun, for a while.

But things all changed at the age of fifteen. They split up — his mother remarrying soon after. The expectations began to grow, he had a stepbrother now who looked up to him, and his mother wanted nothing more than for him to be the best role model.

Mark had been eleven when Johnny was first introduced to him, a young skinny kid with large eyes, watching in amazement at everything he did or said. 

Johnny had reluctantly put down his camera and picked up his studying, after all, it was for the best, right? 

He walked into the street, gazing at the high buildings around him. Although he had lived in Chicago all his life, stepping foot in the big city was completely different.

Everything about New York City seemed to be supersized: the buildings, the personalities, the atmosphere. 

He apologised to a couple he knocked into, picking up his pace to match the flow of the other city goers. The air was fresh but not cold, bright sunlight already flooding the street. Johnny took out his camera, snapping a couple of pictures as he walked.

Hopping into the subway, he followed the directions on his phone to find which line he needed to get. The station was quiet due to the early morning start, and he was able to secure a seat easily. Plugging in his headphones, he settled in for the journey. 

After a long subway ride, and getting slightly lost navigating the streets, He finally arrived at the property. 

Looking up at the building in front of him, Johnny smiled. It was a tall, red-bricked building on the corner of a tucked away street. There were rows of fire escapes down the far right side, and steam drifting out of wall vents — stereotypically New York. 

He fished the address out of his pocket and rang the doorbell with the corresponding number. 

Then he waited…

From his position on the street, Johnny couldn't hear any movement from inside the building. As time passed, his impatience grew, fingers fidgeting for a cigarette. Instead, he hit the buzzer again, hoping  _ someone _ would answer — or at least open the door so he could ask for Mr Carlson. 

Soon after the second buzzer, footsteps could be heard from inside. “I’m coming, I’m coming, geez!” A muffled voice sounded before the front door was pulled open. A young man, no older than Johnny, stood before him. Hair wet from the shower, and draped in what looked to be a silk dressing gown, he cocked an eyebrow in Johnny’s direction: “Who are you?” 

Johnny opened his mouth, slightly taken aback by the abrupt question. He fumbled for the right words while the man in the doorway folded his arms. 

A second passed. 

The man ran a hand through his (obviously unnatural) blond hair — growing restless. “Look if you're the guy from last night,” He cut in before Johnny had a chance to explain himself, “then first off, I don't remember you being that tall… and second, I told you not to come looking for me.” He sighed dramatically stepping back into the hallway and moving to close the door, “To be honest, you’re lucky I even answered, if it wasn't for that damned audition I—“ He seemed to be talking more to himself now — waving a slender hand in Johnny’s direction as if to dismiss him. 

“No, wait!” Johnny started, catching the door before it closed, “I’m here about the room, uh… my name's Johnny, Johnny Suh. I’m looking for Mr Carlson?” 

The blond man stopped, turning back to face him. If Johnny was being honest, he hadn't imagined Mr Carlson to be a young androgynous, Asian man, but who was he to judge?

He stuck out his hand, expecting the landlord to meet him in the middle and formally introduce himself. Instead, the man reached right past him, pressing the buzzer on the top of the list. “Well, that makes sense now, I didn't think I’d have turned someone like you away.” He said with a wink, “I’m Nakamoto Yuta, you can just call me Yuta.” With that, he finally took Johnny’s hand, giving it a firm shake, “Stan should be down soon, he lives in the top apartment.” 

“Right, that's great thanks, um...” Johnny felt slightly awkward,  _ of course _ the landlord wouldn't be living in the same apartment. “Sorry about hitting the wrong bell,” 

“No worries, it happens.” Yuta assured, “Well, I’ll probably see you later roomie,” He continued, taking a step back but leaving the door open this time, “You may as well step in.”

“Thanks.” Johnny made himself comfortable against the wall, his nicotine cravings were quickly coming back and he regretted not having a quick smoke while he waited. 

Yuta waved him off once more, before heading upstairs whistling a tune. 

Once he was alone, Johnny looked around the hallway, eyes adjusting to the dim lighting. The floor was decked out in old black and white tiles, walls painted a deep shade of burgundy. There was a strong musty smell in the air and from where he was standing, Johnny could already see several areas where the plaster was beginning to crumble. He took this opportunity to take some photographs. Focusing his camera on the wear and tear of the building, as well as the dated furnishings.

It took another two minutes of waiting before there was the sound of movement on the stairs. Johnny looked up in time to see a middle-aged man take the last few steps. 

Standing from his leaning position, Johnny stuck out his hand, “Hi, Mr Carlson? My name's Johnny Suh, I’m interested in renting one of your rooms…” 

“Nice to meet you, Johnny,” Mr Carlson greeted, shaking his hand, “we’ll discuss deposits and rent in my office, Also, call me Stan from now on kid.” 

Johnny nodded, following him up the six, long, flights of stairs. Once they reached the top, Stan was huffing slightly, gripping the bannister tightly as he regained his breath. He moved forward, after a short wait and unlocked the door. “Well, come in then.” 

Johnny took in the apartment with wide eyes. The walls and surfaces were covered in an abundance of trinkets, pictures hung crookedly, books and boxes stacked haphazardly. 

The room they entered was painted in the same deep burgundy as the hallways — obviously showing who chose the decoration around here. 

Stan Carlson was most definitely a hoarder, but there was something beautiful about the treasures he had collected over the years. 

Johnny wished to take a photograph, hands coming up to grab his camera. However, he stopped himself — right now was probably not the right time. Instead, he made a mental note to ask in the future. 

“Come, sit,” Stan said, leading them into what seemed to be a small office space. A chair was cleared off for Johnny and Stan plopped himself on the other side of the desk. 

“So, you're interested in flat N.o 5 then?” 

“That’s right, I uh saw your ad in the newspaper, and um, I don't know whether it's still available or not but I felt I should give it a try.” 

Stan nodded, listening to what Johnny had to say. “Well, luckily for you kid, I have difficulty finding tenants for that room,” 

Johnny quirked an eyebrow, “Why, did someone die there?” He laughed before taking one look at Stan’s serious expression and quieting down, “Sorry.” 

Any worries were quickly squashed when Stan’s face broke into a smile of his own, “No nothing like that, most people come here as a group, that flat already has two tenants and only one spare room. I’ll be honest with you, it’s also one of the smallest rooms.”

“The size of the room doesn't bother me, nor does having roommates, I just—” he looked around, trying to grasp the right words, “I just need to be in this part of the city…” 

Stan seemed to understand, moving from his seat and walking over to the window. “Hmm, I get it, there really is nowhere quite like this.” His voice was almost wistful as he spoke, before turning his attention back to Johnny, “Right, let's talk rent.” 

Half an hour and one cash deposit later, Johnny was walking back down the stairs with two small keys in his hand.

Once he got to the right floor, he hesitated outside the door. Eventually, knocking twice, not wishing to be rude and just let himself in — this wasn’t only his apartment, after all. 

A couple of seconds passed and the door opened to reveal a slender man with neat black hair. “Hi… can I help you?” He asked in soft, heavily accented English. 

“Yeah hi, I’m Johnny Suh! I’ll be renting a room here.” He stated, giving a small wave. 

“Oh, please come in,” The man smiled, stepping back to make room for Johnny, “My name's Dongyoung, our other roommate is out right now but you'll meet him later.”

“Yuta right? Yeah, we met earlier.” Johnny scanned his surroundings, he had walked into what looked to be the main living area. There were a few worn out chairs and a sofa positioned in front of an old looking TV. To the side, there was a small kitchen with a table and mismatched chairs. The walls were an off white colour, plants were dotted around the room and a wooden floor could be seen sticking out under a large rug that protruded from a coffee table. 

“Oh, you must be the guy he was talking about then, anyway, your room is just there, once you've put your stuff down, I’ll give you a tour of the place.” 

Johnny thanked him, walking across the room and unlocking his bedroom. 

After a bit of wiggling the key made a satisfying click and the old door swung open. Stan hadn't been lying when he said it was small. There was just enough room for a small double bed, a chair and a small desk. There was a clothing rail at one end of the room and a shelf positioned over the desk. The walls, once the same off white as the living area, had been turned into some sort of mural — different artists leaving their mark on the room — making it their own. Johnny felt a swell of excitement at the thought of adding his own personality to it. 

He placed his bag on the bed, before walking over to the window positioned on the back wall. It was quite standard sized with no windowsill and a wooden blind. From this, Johnny had a view of the back streets and the rooftops of some of the smaller buildings.

Looking around his room, he made note of the things he needed to pick up. This included: bed sheets, lamp, duvet and pillow set. 

Satisfied that he had checked everything out, Johnny stowed his bag away and went back into the main living area. 

Dongyoung was chilling on the worn-out couch, phone held in front of his face. He stood up when he saw Johnny enter, smiling brightly at him, “So, how about that tour then?” 

The next five minutes were used to show Johnny around the limited space they had. Showing him where to find what appliance, how to use the dodgy tap in the bathroom, which window unlocked to get to the fire escape. “And finally, that's Yuta’s room and this is mine, don’t hesitate to knock if you need anything.” There was a pause of silence, “What do you think of the place?”

Johnny gazed around the room, nodding to himself before addressing Dongyoung, “It's perfect!”

This seemed to be the right reaction, as Dongyoung’s face split into a brilliant smile, “Yeah I think so too. Let me know if there’s anything I can help you with. We also have a laundrette downstairs and a bin room. I’ve got to head out in about…” He checked the watch on his wrist, “An hour, but I’m happy to show you some of the local area?” 

“That would be great. In fact, would you mind showing me the best place to buy bed sheets?” 

He nodded, “I know just the shop.” Johnny decided he really liked this roommate. 

***

Around forty minutes later, Johnny was sat at a quiet subway station. 

In one hand he had a bag with bedroom necessities in it, to his side was a large bag containing a duvet set. 

Dongyoung had rushed off soon after Johnny had purchased his goods, saying something about an audition he needed to get to. Johnny had nodded in understanding, reassuring the younger that he’d be able to get back to the apartment just fine by himself, and wishing him good luck. 

It wasn't long before the subway arrived, Johnny stood up walking to the edge of the platform while the vehicle came to a stop. A stream of people stepped off before he got on, searching for a free seat. Luckily the car was pretty empty and he was able to find somewhere for him and his bags. 

About halfway through his journey, he was blankly staring ahead, when his field of vision was obscured. 

His eyes focused, gaze landing on a petite man. The person in front of him was short (or at least shorter than Johnny), face angular and sharp, his hair was a grey/silver colour that stood out against his naturally tan skin, his body thin but obviously muscular. He was dressed in a tight roll neck sweater — many different studs and rings worn artfully in his ears, and skin-tight jeans showing off his figure. Everything about him was effortlessly beautiful.

Johnny couldn't look away.

The other man made himself comfortable, pulling out his phone and putting in his headphones. Part of Johnny wished he had his camera with him, and maybe enough courage to ask the man for a portrait. He gripped the bag on his lap, eyes tracing over the defined facial features before pulling his gaze away — not wanting to come across as creepy. 

It was a couple of stops later when the man in front of him moved to get off. He stood, easily manoeuvring over to the door. Johnny unconsciously watched him go, mesmerised by the sway of his hips. The doors opened and he looked up, eyes meeting with the beautiful stranger for a split second — a small smile appeared on the others face, then he was gone, stepping out of the train and walking away as if he’d never seen Johnny in the first place. 

Feeling slightly stunned, Johnny blinked a couple of times. The doors closed and the train began to move once more. The platform and the beautiful stranger disappearing from view. 

***

The rest of the day was spent walking around the area near his apartment. Johnny had gotten home easily and unpacked his room, before grabbing his camera (that still had half the film to use up) and hitting the streets. In the back of his mind, he knew that looking for a job to while him over was priority number one. However, this was his first day in the city — he could get on to real life stuff later, right now he just wanted to explore. 

The streets around his apartment were fairly busy. Shops, eateries, galleries were dotted around, filled in with studios and apartments in between. 

He walked around, happily minding his business and taking photographs of whatever caught his attention. 

Thoughts of the beautiful man (almost) left his mind, distracted now by the busy streets and interesting buildings. 

Later that evening, as the sun was beginning to get lower on the horizon, Johnny had decided to buy some much-needed groceries, stopping off in a small shop, to grab some essentials. 

Overall, he felt pleased with his successful, first day in a new city. 

***

It was around 8:30 pm when Johnny’s roommates burst into the apartment. Yuta was ranting loudly, something about the damn directors not seeing talent when it was right in front of their goddamn, pointy ass noses. Dongyoung, on the other hand, was a lot quieter, shoulders shrugged and gaze downcast. Johnny guessed that their interviews hadn't been successful today. 

The ranting stopped when they caught sight of Johnny in the kitchen. He was just mixing pasta into sauce, giving it one last taste test before nodding to himself and turning off the stove

He turned around to see two pairs of eyes watching him. “Uh hi guys, I’ve cooked pasta, do you want a bowl?” He asked, hoping not to come across as awkward. 

Yuta, who had been stood with an expression of shock, finally moved. Face splitting into a grin, as he walked over to throw an arm around Johnny’s neck. “Gah best roommate, no offence Dongyoungie!” 

“None taken…” 

“God, I can’t remember the last time we used this kitchen for  _ actual _ food. Yeah, I’ll definitely have some.” Johnny laughed, serving a couple of bowls before looking at Dongyoung. 

“Yeah go on then, I am pretty starving.” He eventually sighed, leaning against the side of the counter as Johnny handed them both a bowl before serving himself. 

“Bad day?” Johnny chanced, noticing the way Yuta was stabbing violently into his food, while Dongyoung lazily picked at his. 

“Yeah you could say that again,” Johnny gave a hum of understanding, not knowing what else to say about the situation. 

There was a beat of silence before Yuta sighed dramatically. 

“Fuck this depressing shit!” He exclaimed, walking over to the fridge and pulling out a six pack of beers, “It’s your first day here, we should get to know each other a bit before bringing the mood down with our crappy days. So beers on the roof, who's in?” Dongyoung and Johnny looked at each other, shrugged and followed their other roommate out of the apartment. Just before they left, Johnny made sure to sling his camera around his neck. 

The roof was exactly what Johnny expected it to be. There were vents dotted around, pouring out steam and a few satellite disks attached to the stairwell. 

What he wasn't expecting, however, was the plastic patio furniture that was positioned in the centre. Yuta grabbed a chair kicking his leg onto the table and finishing off the last of his food. Dongyoung sat on the opposite side, digging into his pasta properly now that they were outside. Johnny took the last space, cracking open a beer and taking a large swig. 

“So what brings you to New York City?” Yuta spoke up once Johnny had gotten comfortable. 

Leaning back on his chair, he nursed his beer in his hands and gazed off over the city. The sound of the street below travelled up to meet them, a faint breeze carrying car horns and distant chatter. He pondered the question, before answering honestly: “I don't know really?” it was true, Johnny had wanted to go to New York specifically, but what was the real reason? He shrugged before continuing: “I guess, inspiration, opportunity, a chance to find myself… You know all the cliche reasons.” The other two laughed, raising their beers in agreement. “To tell you the truth, I’m trying to pursue a career in photography.” He motioned to the camera around his neck, “I’ve been shooting for years and I feel it’s the right time to take it further, you know?” The other two made sounds of understanding and interest, asking him a bit about his photography. “What about you guys? How long have you been in the city?” 

Dongyoung spoke up first. “I want to be an actor! I’ve been here for about four months… It's hard, but it's worth it, I couldn't see myself leaving anytime soon.” 

“What interview did you have today?” 

At that Dongyoung sighed, “Ugh, it wasn't even that great of a gig, it was just a minor role in a commercial,” He laughed, tipping his head back, smile spreading over his face, “Maybe it’s a good thing I didn't get it, I don't want to be known as the annoying dish soap guy.” The two others laughed along.

Johnny felt a spark of admiration at the younger — it was a difficult thing to do, picking yourself up after a rejection.

“Yeah the next one will be better you’ll see,” Yuta chimed in, hitting his friends on the arm. 

“What about you?” Johnny tilted his head in the other man’s direction. 

“Me? Well, I’ve been here for just over a year and a half now, kinda jumped around trying things out, before moving here six months ago. I guess I’m part of the ‘find yourself’ cliche too.” He took a swig of his beer, “Well I moved from Japan to find more freedom, then I tried my hand at stand up, did some amateur improv, got into the drag scene and now…” He leapt up from his chair, jumping onto it and throwing his arms out behind him, “I want my name in lights, Broadway lights!” Dongyoung cheered and Johnny laughed loudly as he wobbled on the unstable plastic chair, quickly snapping a picture. 

Yuta plopped back down sticking his feet back onto the table, “Yeah that’s what I was doing today, auditing for a chorus role, but  _ apparently _ you need dancing experience to get into these shows.” He scoffed disbelievingly, “So I've signed me and Dongie up to dance classes.” 

“Hey!” Dongyoung called out, obviously not on board with this plan, to which Yuta just ignored. 

“Have you got a cig?” He asked instead, beckoning with his hand. Johnny nodded, fishing out two and handing one to him. Dongyoung shook his head when he was offered one, rolling his eyes and sending a glare at Yuta. 

After lighting up, Johnny leant forward and lit the stick between Yuta’s lips. They both inhaled deeply, releasing a stream of smoke in unison. 

“I thought you’d quit?” Dongyoung complained. 

Yuta flicked the ash off the end before replying, “I did… yesterday… today's a new day Dongie, can’t stay living in the past.” Johnny couldn't argue with that logic, tipping his head back and watching the smoke snake and swirl above him. 

They stayed there for a while, laughing, drinking, sharing stories from their past. 

As one conversation died out, Yuta was quick to jump in with a new subject “Right, house rules.” He spoke up, halfway through his second beer, “Now seems like as good a time as any to run through them, don't you think?” 

“Hit me with it.” Johnny agreed — legs stretched out in front of him and arms crossed behind his head. 

“This should be good…” Dongyoung laughed loudly.

Yuta winked at his friend, a shit eating grin on his face, “Right. Number one: no in-house dating, I know we’re just  _ so  _ irresistible—” He drawled, fluttering his eyelashes, “But trust me, things always get super awkward after hooking up with a roommate, look, I speak from experience…” 

Johnny let out a snort, rolling his eyes dramatically. “Sorry to burst your bubble, Yuta, But neither of you are my type…” 

“Oh darn, if I was a girl you'd be all over me by now I swear!” 

“Well,” Johnny hesitated, “not that gender really matters… but I’m more into petite guys… sorry.” An image of the beautiful man from the subway popped back into his head, he let it linger, laughing again, this time at the ridiculous pout that Yuta was sporting. 

“That's fine with me, I'm really not interested in dating anyone.” Dongyoung chimed in, chucking his empty can at Yuta when he turned his pout on him.

“Okay,” Yuta pulled the subject back quickly “Number two—” The next half hour was spent going through Yuta’s house rules, from things as simple as washing up, to more complex TV schedule… Johnny listened well, laughing at his new friends and their strange antics.

The evening crept on and the three of them decided to call it a night at around 1:30 in the morning, both other roommates still having to get up for work the next day. 

Johnny knew he too would have to start looking for jobs, plus he also had plans to check out the local film developers, see their price lists, and developing options. 

The three bid each other goodnight. 

Once his bedroom door was closed, Johnny flopped into his freshly made bed, he felt the long day catching up with him and before he knew it, sleep was creeping in.

New York City was his fresh start, and he was going to make the most of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter one done! I hope you like it!
> 
> I've never actually lived in NYC so I'm really sorry about any inaccuracy that may appear throughout this fic.
> 
> And again, sorry for any spelling or grammatical errors! 
> 
> Thank you for reading ~~


	2. Dance

The next morning, Johnny had spent a while looking around the different development shops, before settling on the one that had the best options and price range for him. 

In the end, he had decided on a Kodak photoshop that called itself, NYPhotographic. It was a small store, close by to his apartment. Run by a couple in their mid-forties, it offered the exact processes Johnny needed at a better price than some of the flashier places he had also looked at. 

This shop had been one of the last he visited on his second day in the city, almost missing it as, unlike a lot of the others, it didn't rely on a large window display or bright colours. This had been the first thing to catch his attention, the next was the display of second-hand cameras that were for sale.

As soon as Johnny entered he saw them, eyes instantly drawn to a Polaroid 600. He wandered over to it, quickly noticing the price tag and sighing to himself. It wasn't  _ hugely _ expensive, but it was currently out of his price range. “Maybe another time…” He mumbled to himself, turning in the direction of the desk to see a woman smiling at him. 

“Hi, how may I help you?” She spoke up. 

“Hi, um I’m new here and, I was just wondering if I could see your price list?” 

“Of course,” The woman smiled, handing a piece of paper over to Johnny. 

Scanning the list, he was really pleased to see the much more manageable prices, alongside the process that he would be needing. “Do you develop both colour and black and white?” He asked. 

“Yes, we do colour and black and white, in both 35mm and 120. Unfortunately, we no longer have the machine to develop 110 but we are in partnership with someone who does.”

Johnny nodded, “That's great thank you, what are your printing facilities like?” She jumped into her explanation, telling him about the different size options and paper types that they had to offer, as well as explaining how he can just email them with a high-quality image and they can sort out the prints for him. 

He thanked her once again before leaving the shop, there were still a couple more places to check out but this one was looking hopeful. 

The next day, he had rushed back in at opening times, film canister in hand.

He walked in, bell jiggling upon arrival, and placed the role of film on the counter, as well as a memory stick. The same woman from the day before was there, she smiled as she approached the desk. “Hi again, what can I do for you?” 

“Hey, is it possible to get this for dev and scan only please?” 

“Absolutely. Are you happy to pick it up tomorrow?” 

“Yeah, that's fine… and um, I was wondering, do you have any jobs going here?” He might as well ask, there was nothing to lose anyway. 

“Ah I’m sorry, my husband and I have been running this shop for years, we’re never busy enough to need more hands…” Johnny understood, assuring her it was fine. She spoke up again, “But I did hear that the record store over the road was looking for a shelf stacker, you're pretty tall, might want to check it out?”

Thanking her, Johnny left the shop and made his way across the road. 

The record store was an open front shop, there were boxes upon boxes of vinyl creating corridors through the room, plus even more stacked against the walls. 

An R&B song was playing through the large speakers positioned around the shop — a few people milling around.

Johnny made his way through the room, checking out a few records as he went. 

Once he got to the counter, he introduced himself and asked if they still had a job going. The lady at the till asked if he had a CV with him, he nodded, reaching into his bag to pull out the piece of paper. After checking it through, she seemed satisfied, asking if he was available for an interview now. 

Although surprised by the speed of things, Johnny agreed and followed her into a back room. 

The interview went by quickly. The woman, who he now knew to be called Kiya, asked him a bit about his music taste, why he moved to New York City, his interests, etc. He had managed to wing his way through most of it, telling her a bit about his photography as he went. Kiya seemed interested, admitting that she was trying to get into modelling. He subtly suggested that maybe he could help her out with portfolio images in the futures — anything to get his work out there. 

“That would be amazing! Hey, me and my girlfriend, we have some friends who are into the fashion and dance scene around here, maybe I should introduce you to them, that's if your photography is really as good as you say it is…” The last bit was said as a joke, Johnny laughed along thanking her in advance. 

Kiya was a young woman, maybe a couple of years older than Johnny, she had a striking appearance, natural afro hair cropped short, bold makeup accentuating her features and tattoos visible under the tank top she was wearing. Johnny could see her being a very successful model in the future. “Now, about the job…” She hesitated for a second, “I have a couple of other people who applied, but I think it's safe to say you're looking positive. I’ll call to let you know tomorrow.” 

Thanking her, Johnny scribbled down his mobile number and left the shop. 

***

A couple of weeks later, Johnny had just finished work and was heading to pick up his film.

He had been successful in getting the record store job and had quickly fallen into a routine, getting along well with the other staff and talking more with Kiya about photoshoot ideas. 

This had led him to taking headshots for his friends, using Dongyoung and Yuta as a way to try out a couple of different options — to find out what worked best. They had been happy to help out, especially when Johnny said they would get a set of free portraits for their efforts.

Today he was picking up a black and white film.

He had a couple camera options for the headshots, depending on what people wanted. His DSLR: high-quality digital images, the cheaper option as it didn't involve development and film expenses. Or the Kiev 60: a medium format camera with a beautiful quality to it, it was more specialist, and therefore more expensive, but he wanted people to have as many options as they could. Today he was picking up some test shots from the Kiev 60, as well as a few portrait prints. He had promised to show Kiya the outcomes before she agreed to be photographed. 

After paying for his stuff, Johnny headed back to his apartment, excited to show his friends the results from the shoot. 

“Hey, guys,” He called out once he entered, kicking off his shoes and grabbing his laptop from his bedroom, “I’ve got the film back.” The two roommates looked up, excitedly smiling when he placed his laptop down on the coffee table, flashing up the scans from today. “I’ve also got some of the digital ones printed for you, what do you think?” 

His friends looked through the pictures on his laptop, before taking the prints and scanning through them. “Wow, Johnny these are like, really good,” Dongyoung spoke up, eyes scanning over the pictures in front of him, “are you sure we can have these for free?” 

Johnny shrugged, “Yeah you guys really helped me out, I don't mind helping you in return.” 

“Man, are you sure you're not a professional yet? Because these are better than most of the headshots I've had in the past!” Yuta exclaimed, happily copying the negative scans over to his own memory stick. “Hope you don't mind but I'm going to be bragging about this to the people at dance tonight.” Johnny chuckled, telling his friends that they could do whatever they wanted with them. 

***

That evening, while Johnny was chilling on the sofa, his friends arrived home from their dance class. “Johnny” The call of his name startled him, he sat up quickly coming face to face with his sweaty roommates. 

“What's up? Is something wrong?” 

“No of course not, look… you can thank me later, I know I'm the best roommate ever, but let's just call it even for the  _ amazing _ free headshots you did for us.” Yuta loudly rambled. 

It's safe to say Johnny was confused. Thankfully, Dongyoung was there to make things clearer. Waving a sheet of paper in his hand and dropping it in Johnny’s lap, “Just take a look.”

Picking up the sheet, he saw a list of names written. At the top of the list was the title, ‘Johnny Suh Headshots’ he blinked in surprise turning to face his friends. “You guys did this for me?” 

“Yeah man, need to get your talent out there somehow, it’s your day off tomorrow right?” Johnny nodded, “Well that’s great,” Yuta continued, “we have a long practice tomorrow, so you can tag along with us and help these people out with their headshots in their free time. It might even be the perfect opportunity for you to take some portraits, or find some models for future work.” 

Next to the names, was written whether they wanted film or digital pictures. Johnny let out a sigh of relief when he saw digital written against every name. Although he preferred shooting film, he wouldn't be getting paid till the end of the week and currently didn’t have enough film to go around the whole group. This also meant that he would be able to use his Medium format camera for his own, personal, use tomorrow. 

With a mixture of excitement and nerves, he set about getting himself ready.

***

The morning rolled around quickly and Johnny was up and raring go, waiting for his friends to get ready so that they could leave for the dance studios. This was his first real photography job and he was eager to get started. 

They arrived at around 10 am, the building was a big open space. There were several mirrored areas set up as well as plain brick walls. Johnny surveyed the area, taking in what was available for him to use, and where the best place to set up would be. 

His friends led him over to a group of people sitting around in a chaired area, introducing him as the photographer they had been telling them about. Johnny had smiled wide, giving a wave to the group and putting his bag down on a spare seat. 

“Um, I just need to set up my laptop and then I’m pretty much ready to start, Is there anyone who wants to go first?” He looked around hopefully when suddenly a familiar face walked up to him. 

“Johnny?” It was Kiya, she was in her dance gear, hand in hand with a tall woman. 

“Kiya, hi! I didn't know you went to this class?” 

“Yeah, well I don't go that regularly, but Gem does so I like to tag along from time to time.” 

“Nice to meet you,” Johnny greeted his colleague's girlfriend, “are either of you wanting pictures today?” 

“Yeah, I put my name down yesterday, so I'm happy to go first.” Gem said, smiling politely at him. “Just tell me where you want me.” 

After that, things began to move smoothly, Johnny found it easy to work with the different dancers, posing and photographing them in a way that would show off their individual personalities. The times they were all busy dancing or practicing, Johnny used to edit the pictures and get them sent to the corresponding person. He had also been taking the occasional portrait for his own portfolio, making connections with people who wanted to help him out with modelling. 

Kiya had come back up to him later that day, commissioning him for a series of portraits. She was impressed by his work and interested in working on her own portfolio for her modelling. Johnny had agreed right away, feeling pleased that she had ended up liking it. They set a couple of future dates for shoots before she was called back to the dance practice. 

By this point, there was only one more name on his list, but Johnny was yet to find them in the crowd. Scanning around the room, he almost didn't notice when a new person slipped into the building — only being alerted by the sound of the closing door. 

As he looked up he caught sight of the new arrival, eyes widening.

Walking into the dance area was a petite male, sender body swaying as he moved. Johnny recognised him instantly. 

Standing in front of him was the same beautiful stranger from the train. Even though his hair was now light brown in colour and ears void of their usual jewellery, it was still unmistakably him, sharp angles and soft features — breathtaking. 

Johnny watched as the man greeted the other dancers, before beginning his warm up. 

He slowly lifted the camera to his face, focusing and quickly snapping a picture as the boy in front of him contorted his body in ways nobody should naturally move — just like in the subway, Johnny couldn't look away. 

The camera shutter made a loud clunk (usual for something as big as the Kiev 60, not the most subtle of cameras). At the sound, the man looked up — eyes narrowing as he saw Johnny lower the camera from his face. 

He spun around quickly, removing himself from the frame. 

Embarrassment washed over Johnny — suddenly worried that he had offended the other man. 

As if he could hear his thoughts, Dongyoung came over to answer his queries: “Don’t mind Ten. He’s like that with everyone at first — he’ll come around, eventually…” 

Unsure of how to react, Johnny just nodded dumbly as his gaze once again travelled to the mysterious man. “Ten huh…” He let the name circle through his head, it had a unique air about it, and Johnny couldn't help but feel it matched its owner well. 

Glancing down at the paper in hand, Johnny finally took in the last name on the list.

He felt a ball of nerves pool in his stomach as written in neat handwriting, was the word: Ten. 

Kicking himself mentally, Johnny took a deep breath and started walking in the direction the other man had gone. 

“Uh, hi Ten right?” He asked, coming to a stop by a small group of dancers. Hoping to come across as confident and not the hot mess he had suddenly become, he took another deep breath before continuing: “Your name’s on my list, what time is best to get these photos taken for you?” 

Up close, he could finally take in the man in front of him. Ten really was small, but his body was perfectly proportioned, years of dancing making him lean and muscular. 

Johnny swallowed hard. 

“Do you always stare?” Was the first thing that left Ten’s mouth, turning around and fixing Johnny with a pointed look. 

“I uh…” Johnny stuttered, feeling himself turn red at the sudden question. The person standing next to Ten let out a quiet giggle.

“Ten, chill out a bit,” They said, pushing their friend's arm, “Johnny’s a great photographer, just give him a chance.” 

Johnny shot them a thankful smile. 

“Taeyong, you're supposed to be on  _ my _ side.” Ten hissed, turning his glare on his friend. 

“Hey don't look at me like that, I know what's best for you, and trust me, his photography is worth it.” 

Ten sighed dramatically, turning back to face Johnny, “Okay, I’ll be free in about half an hour, are you happy to wait?” 

“Yeah of course.” Johnny shot him a smile, relief washing over him, “I’ll be just over by the table, grab me when you're ready.” Ten agreed before joining the rest of the group. 

Never had half an hour taken so long. Johnny busied himself, quickly sorting and sending the newest photographs. He checked through the payments he had received so far, ticking off the names from his list and making a note of those he was yet to receive. 

Then, it was time to wait. He sat trying to avoid watching the dancers, not wanting to be off-putting (and also not wanting his eyes to wander to the one particular dancer he was drawn to). 

Unable to stay still for another twenty minutes, Johnny decided to head out for a smoke, he hadn't had one since that morning and blamed his sudden jitters on nicotine cravings. 

Two and a half cigarettes later, the door opened and Johnny became aware of a presence beside him. 

“You smoke?” An accusatory voice sounded. Johnny looked up from where he was scrolling on his phone to see Ten. 

“Sorry, I hadn't realised how long I'd been. Are you ready for the shoot?” He said, deciding to ignore what the other man had said. He stubbed out the remainder of his cigarette and stood up from where he was leaning. 

Ten shook his head pursing his lips slightly, “You know you’re adding to the basic photographer stereotype right?” 

Johnny shrugged, “How about the lawyer stereotype? I started smoking in law school.” He didn't really know why he was saying this, but the words just came out naturally, was he oversharing? 

Finally, though Ten let out a laugh, shaking his head again and telling Johnny to follow him inside. Maybe this wasn't going to be so bad. 

***

As expected, Ten was a fantastic model. He knew exactly how to pose, how to hold himself, Johnny didn't have to work hard to get the results. By the end of the shoot, he was feeling much more comfortable around the shorter man, laughing and Joking with him, like he would the rest of the dancers. 

“Beautiful…” Johnny mumbled under his breath, snapping a couple of photographs as Ten pulled a new pose. 

“What was that?” Ten asked with a raised eyebrow. 

“Uh, nothing sorry.” Johnny blurted, not realising that the other could hear him. He didn't miss the small smile that appeared on Ten’s lips — a mirror image to the one from the first time he saw him.

“You really do stare a lot…” Ten commented, making Johnny’s face heat up in embarrassment. “Today when I was stretching, ages ago on the subway…” Johnny blanched, failing to come up with any words. At the shock on his face, Ten let out a laugh, “Don’t worry about it, I was looking particularly great that day…” 

Unsure of how else to react, Johnny let out his own laugh, scratching the back of his neck. “I didn't know you saw that…” He finally said, voice eventually returning to him. 

It was Ten’s turn to shrug now, averting his eyes, “I don't know, you were sitting there all tall and brooding, kind of difficult not to notice you.” 

“Tall and brooding?” 

Without missing a beat, Ten changed the subject. “Well, thanks for today, Taeyong was right, you're a great photographer. You said something about looking for models right? Well, you’re welcome to add my name to that list.” He scribbled down his phone number and email address, promising to pay him as soon as he got home. 

Johnny thanked him in advance, waving in return as the other left. 

He stood there, slightly star-struck for a second before shaking his head and moving to pack up his equipment. 

***

It wasn't long after that for Yuta and Dongyoung to finish with their day, giving Johnny enough time to edit and send off Ten’s headshots before they were ready to head home. 

“I see you and Ten got pretty chatty there,” Yuta spoke up as they were making their way out onto the street, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. 

“Yeah well, I like to talk to the people I photograph.” Johnny rolled his eyes at what his friend was insinuating. 

“But, he sure did come around a lot quicker than I thought he would.” Dongyoung agreed, slinging an arm around Yuta’s neck. They both gave him a pointed stare. 

“Well, we technically met on a train back at the beginning of March, so maybe he felt more comfortable around me.” He stated bluntly, the fact that they hadn't spoken a word and the only interaction served to be a brief moment of eye contact, didn't need to be shared…

“Didn’t you say something about being into petite guys?” Johnny ignored Yuta’s question, knowing full well what he was trying to get from him.

“So pizza? I heard there's this new place that's opened up near us, don't know if you want to check it out?” 

Realising that they weren't going to get anything more out of Johnny on this subject, his friends agreed and the three of them headed on to the next destination. 

  
  



	3. Inspiration

The first of April rolled around, and finally, it was Johnny’s first payday. He said goodbye to his work friends, quickly crossing the street and making his way into the photoshop. “Hey!” he greeted happily, wandering over to the counter. 

“Hi Johnny, I’ll just get your film now.” Over the past few weeks, Johnny had become somewhat of a regular at NYPhotographic, stopping in a couple of times a week (at the very least) to pick up and drop off film. 

The shop owner walked over to a rack, looking through the bags before pulling out the one with Johnny’s name on it. “Here you go, I gotta say, you're a very talented photographer.” She said kindly. Johnny thanked her, picking up the bag and placing it in his own. “Is there anything else I can get for you?” 

At this Johnny smiled, nodding, “Yeah actually, I was able to save up a bit of extra cash, so I was wondering if I could take a look at that Polaroid 600.” He motioned with his hand to the cabinet on the wall, pointing out the one he had spotted on his second day in the city. 

“Certainly,” She unlocked the cupboard, taking out the camera and finding the corresponding box.

Placing it on the counter, she allowed Johnny to pick it up and have a look.

It didn't take long for Johnny to decide that he was gonna go for it, paying the price and also buying two packs of film. 

New camera in hand, Johnny left the shop feeling a rush of fresh inspiration. 

***

A few days after that, and a week and a bit after the dance photoshoot, Johnny had been busy putting away the newest vinyl at work, when he heard a loud huff from behind him; followed by a quiet laugh. “I should have known you’d work somewhere like this. You really are just the hipster stereotype — what's next gonna grow a beard? Start wearing nothing but plaid?” 

Johnny turned around, unsurprised to see the person who came with the voice. Ten was leaning against one of the boxes, his arms crossed and a playful glint in his eye. “All right  _ Mr high and mighty _ , where do you work then, or is dance the  _ only _ thing you do? Besides, I must be a terrible hipster, I don't even own a record player.” He joked back, putting down the empty box and picking up the one Ten was using as a rest. 

“Wow, you fake! Anyway, I’ll have you know I'm but a simple waiter at a coffee shop.” 

“Where, Starbucks?” 

Ten scoffed, pretending to take offence, “Please, like you’d catch me dead in there. No, I work at ‘Procaffintion’…”

“Fuck, who's pretentious now?” They both laughed before the two of them lapsed into silence. “So, is there anything I can help you with, or did you just come here to judge the staff?” 

At the question, Ten scoffed again,“ Believe it or not, I’m actually here for some music inspiration, I've been set to choreograph part of the next show, and I desperately need something for us to dance too. So if you have any ideas, I'm literally all ears.” 

Johnny gave some thought to the question, scanning around the different records and looking for something that could work. “What's the dance about, do you have a theme yet?” 

Ten shook his head, “Na, I work best from knowing the music first.” 

Johnny nodded, leading Ten around the store. Occasionally, he'd point out songs or albums that might work, playing him snippets from his phone and seeing what Ten’s reaction was. Most of the time Ten responded positively noting down the name on his hand, other times he’d shoot it down, saying something about it not having the right mood, or the rhythm too difficult to choreograph to. By the end of half an hour, Ten had two records in his hand, and a bunch of other songs to listen to. Johnny led him up to the checkout, waving to Kiya on the other till. 

“Hi Johnny, hi Ten,” She greeted, “did you find what you need?” She directed this question to Ten, who was currently placing the two albums on the counter and fishing out his wallet. 

“Yeah, I think so,” He flashed her the list on his hand, “thanks for suggesting this place.” 

Kiya waved him off, “No worries. I would have helped you with your search but, you two seemed a bit preoccupied and  _ somebody _ needed to run the shop.” She sent a wink in Johnny’s direction, making him realise just how long he had left his post.

“Shit, sorry about that,” He scanned the barcode on the albums, placing them back down and addressing his friend, “I kinda got distracted,” 

This statement only made her laugh, shaking her head and placing a reassuring hand on his shoulder, “Nah, don't apologise, I had a suspicion that would happen. Anyway Ten, I’ll be over later, so see you tonight?” She ended her sentence with a question, flicking her eyes between Ten and Johnny. 

The shorter male scowled slightly, “Yeah, I’ll be there, where else would I go?” His voice had a slight challenge in it.

She just shrugged nonchalantly: “I don't know, you tell me?” 

There was a pause of silence, Kiya and Ten seemingly sharing a conversation with their eyes alone. Noticing Johnny’s confusion, Ten turned towards him to explain: “I share a place with Taeyong and Gem, so Kiya practically lives with us most of the time.” 

“Yeah, Ten and Gem are like the originals here, they've known each other for years.” Kiya added, “And then I came along and stole Gem away, and Taeyong joined the group, now the four of us have been hanging out ever since.” 

Interested in learning more, Johnny spoke up, “So how long have you been living in NYC?” he questioned Ten. 

“Uh, around four-ish years now, I moved from Thailand just after I turned eighteen.” Ten nodded to himself, recalling the memory. 

“What made you want to come here?” It was an innocent question, one Johnny had been asked many times, by many people, over his short time in the city. He was just curious. So far everyone he’d asked had answered him, talking of cliches, dreams, opportunities. However, the only thing he received from Ten was a blank stare. 

And just like that, he watched Ten close himself off, shoulders stiffening and body becoming tense — any warmth from their prior conversation disappearing. 

The few seconds that passed were agonising, Johnny didn't miss the concerned look Kiya was sending the shorter man. Finally, he spoke up: “I just wanted to. New York City seemed like the right place, and I mean, I guess it was as I haven't left yet.” Ten forced a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes, “How much did you say it was again?” 

“Oh right,” Johnny looked at the vinyl that lay almost forgotten between them. He listed off the price, watching as Ten paid and bid them goodbye. 

Then he was gone, and Johnny was left staring dumbly ahead, a feeling of confusion settling in his chest.

Seeing his worry, Kiya stepped in. “Don’t beat yourself up about this… It’s just a bit of a touchy subject.” 

Johnny wanted to ask more, but he knew he only wanted the answers from Ten. Not that Kiya would agree to tell him anyway. So instead he just nodded, getting back to work. Knowing inside, that he’d wait for Ten as long as it took — this thought alone sent a strange shiver down his spine. 

***

“Yeah that's great, If you could just move your arm like— Yup, perfect, okay hold that pose,” Johnny pressed the shutter, hearing the loud clunk of the camera, and winding on to the next shot.

He was currently in the living room of Gem’s apartment, this was the second shoot in a series of three with Kiya, and probably the most intimate one. Kiya was lounging out in a silk dressing gown (borrowed from Yuta), body elegantly draped over the sofa, natural light from the large window pouring in and shrouding her in a blanket of gold. 

So far, their project had gone smoothly. First, they had met up to properly discuss ideas, deciding to shoot on medium format colour film, and choosing locations that added meaning or depth to the photographs. Next, they had confirmed the dates that had been discussed before, making sure that they fit in well with their busy schedules. Then finally it was on to shooting. 

There was a strange sense of anticipation hanging around Johnny. This was the first time he was in Gem’s (and therefore Ten’s) apartment. It had been just over a week since the situation in the shop, and Johnny wanted nothing more than to apologise to the younger. He had thought about texting, making an excuse to meet up, but something held him back — not wanting to overstep any more boundaries then he already had. 

However, since he had arrived at the apartment, and started shooting (a good hour ago now), neither Ten or Taeyong had been present. 

Johnny tried not to feel disappointed, after all, he didn't know Ten’s schedule, it was more likely that he was busy at work, rather than trying to avoid him — or so Johnny tried to convince himself. 

_ Clunk _ , “Brilliant Thank you, that's the end of the roll. Is there anything else you want to try out?” Kiya shook her head, sitting up and pulling the gown secularly around her frame. 

“No, I trust you, thanks again Johnny, I can’t wait to see the outcomes.” 

“Me too, I’ll send you the photos as soon as I've got them back.”

“Thanks for letting me take over your apartment Gem.” He said while packing up his equipment. 

Gem, who had been watching the shoot, quietly from the side of the room, smiled kindly. “You’re welcome, but then again, I’d do anything for Kiya so it’s really no problem.”

After that, Johnny said his goodbyes and left. 

As he bounded down the stairs, taking two steps at a time, he almost collided head first with two people making their way up. 

“Oh shit, sorry Taeyong, Ten… I almost didn't see you there.” 

“Don’t sweat it,” Taeyong reassured at the same time as Ten spoke. 

“You in a hurry to be somewhere?” 

“Uh no not really, just excited to get the film developed,” Both people nodded at his answer, before beginning their climb again, Johnny watched them leave, his moment to talk to Ten quickly slipping away. 

He racked his brain, desperately searching for something to say — before an idea finally came to mind: “Oh Ten,” the younger turned around, cocking an eyebrow, “Did I tell you I brought a Polaroid camera recently?” Ten shook his head, seeming more interested already. “Well, I'm actually yet to try it out and I was wondering, if you’re happy to of course, would you want to be my model?” He let the question hang in the air, preparing himself for rejection. 

Taeyong gave Ten a pointed stare, silently egging him on. To Johnny’s surprise, It didn't take much for him to agree, nodding once, a smile appearing on his face. He stepped down a couple of stairs until he was standing on the same level as Johnny, “What did you have in mind?” 

That's how, fifteen minutes later, Johnny found himself in a nearby park. Ten was pressed practically into a bush, face surrounded by leaves, the evening sun casting mottled shadows against his features. He was practically glowing in this light, honey skin and caramel hair showing their warm hues. Johnny felt his breath hitch in his throat, completely taken aback by the beautiful man in front of him. It felt as if he was back on the subway, catching the first glimpse of Ten as he listened to music, artfully crossing a leg over his knee. 

There were only eight shots in a pack of Polaroid film, and Johnny wanted to make every one count. The two of them walked around together, chatting comfortably until inspiration struck. Then they would take time composing the photograph before actually shooting. It was time-consuming but one of Johnny’s favourite things about photography — taking his time, getting the perfect shot. 

Any awkwardness from the week before had disappeared, replaced with the same friendly atmosphere that they had become used to from the first photoshoot. Johnny was relieved, deciding not to bring up what happened so as to not dampen the mood. He only hoped that these photographs would serve as a good enough apology. 

They continued until the light began to fade. Johnny snapping the last picture while Ten was unprepared, capturing him mid-laugh, unposed and completely natural. Ten had pouted when he heard the camera click, claiming that Johnny had just wasted the last frame. However, as the photograph developed, Johnny had to secretly disagree — the image quickly becoming one of his favourites from the evening. 

“Thanks for asking me to be your model, Johnny. This was fun.” He sounded sincere, bumping his shoulder against Johnny’s as they walked side by side. They had just looked through the photographs, Johnny allowing him to pick whichever Polaroids he wanted, promising to give them to him once he had created digital copies. Ten had been surprised, eagerly looking through the images and selecting his favourite four. “Also congrats on not smoking! I didn't know you nicotine addicts were able to go this long outside without lighting up.” He added, tone light and jokey. 

Johnny had chuckled, shaking his head slightly, Ten really must hate that habit if he was going to bring it up every time they met. “Yeah, I don't normally smoke when I shoot, don't feel the need you know?” It was true, however, now Ten had mentioned it Johnny could feel his fingers begin to itch, nicotine cravings making themselves known. Instead of lighting up now, Johnny stuffed his hands deep into his pocket, not wanting to ruin the evening. 

They arrived at the edge of the park — the place their paths would split. Johnny needed to take a short subway ride to his part of town, while Ten took a five-minute walk in the opposite direction. 

They both hesitated by the gates, still chatting happily and enjoying the last warmth of the day. Ten checked his phone, eyes widening when he saw the time, “Shit, the developers would have closed by now,” He looked genuinely concerned, rubbing a hand self consciously against his arm. “Sorry for taking up so much time.” 

Johnny had felt his chest tighten, quickly rushing to reassure him. “There’s really nothing to be sorry about, this was my idea in the first place, and plus, we had fun right? I don't regret anything.” 

Ten had smiled brightly, leaning up to pull Johnny into a brief hug. “Let's do this again sometime yeah?” 

“Definitely” 

With that Ten was pulling away, waving to Johnny as he walked quickly down the street. 

***

The next day, Johnny had gone straight to the film developers, smiling brightly at the owner before handing over his film, and the Polaroid pictures from the day before. “Would you possibly be able to scan these in please?” He asked politely, hoping she would be able to help.

Thankfully, she nodded, picking up the photos and flicking through them. “Ah, it’s this boy again,” She said, catching Johnny off guard, “he’s one of the dancers right, I recognise him from the prints you made a couple of weeks ago. He’s very beautiful.” 

Johnny smiled, eyes tracing over the photos himself, “Yeah, he is…” He couldn't help but agree. 

The print the lady was referring to, was the one of him stretching. Ten had texted some time after the shoot, asking to see it one day, and Johnny hadn't hesitated to print him out a copy. After all, he couldn’t deny that he was particularly proud of it.

What the shop owner said next, however, made Johnny look up — snapping his gaze away from the Ten in his pictures: “Beautiful, but sad… don’t you think?” Johnny frowned. Seeing his expression, she elaborated, “There’s just something melancholic about his gaze…” 

Now that he was looking for it, Johnny could kind of understand where she was coming from. Memories of their chat in the record shop coming back to him. At that moment, before he had left, Ten had looked different. Less of the loud, outgoing dancer with a sharp tongue and bold personality... more anxious, almost fearful — the perfect mask slipping for just a second.

“—Apart from this one,” she pointed to the last picture from the shoot, cutting off Johnny’s train of thought. It was the picture of Ten, mid-laugh, reacting to something stupid Johnny had said — face scrunched up and eye’s curved. “This one shows genuine happiness.” 

After that, Johnny had thanked her and left, agreeing to pick up his stuff the next day. His mind was full of thoughts of the man in his photographs. Maybe the owner was right, and an air of sadness did surround him. Whatever it was, there was definitely more to Ten than he was showing. But then again, that was to be expected right? It’s not like they really knew each other. Why would Ten be open around an almost stranger? 

  
  



	4. Procaffeination

After that evening in the park, the two of them had begun to meet up more regularly, slowly but surely getting to know each other. It had started off as little things, Johnny being invited by Kiya for a meal or a night out, Gem insisting he stay for food after a photoshoot, Yuta and Dongyoung asking him to come along to the dance practise — all places and activities that would also involve Ten. The two of them always ended up next to each other at some point, chatting away, as if there was no one else in the room.

However, today was a little different. Today there had been no invite, no event and no photoshoot planned. Instead, Johnny had been walking through a part of town he hadn't been to before when he came across an interesting looking cafe. He glanced up, the name sounding strangely familiar. 

In bold writing, was written the word ’Procaffeination’. Johnny let out a chuckle, remembering Ten’s words from the record store, a few weeks ago. He checked his phone, deciding that he had plenty of time before his evening shift started, and walked in. 

The strong smell of coffee hit him upon entering, he inhaled deeply before looking around for an empty seat. 

The cafe was fairly busy. People finishing off their lunches and having a mid-afternoon break. Johnny found a table for two, tucked around a corner. He placed his jacket on the chair, before getting in line. 

While he waited to be severed, he took in the interior of the coffee shop. It was nice and modern, sleek wooden furniture, low hanging lights and a mixture of indoor plants and local artwork, dotted around. The floor was also wooden, and the walls a dark green. Overall, Johnny decided he quite liked the place. 

The line moved quickly, and it wasn't long before Johnny was called to order. A strange giddy feeling settled in his stomach as he caught sight of Ten working behind the counter, stacking a cup in preparation for the next customer. “Hey, I didn’t know you worked here?” Johnny couldn't help himself but smile brightly as he addressed the other, Ten looked up at the familiar voice, smiling equally as bright once his eyes landed on Johnny. 

“Are you stalking me?” He questioned, raising an eyebrow and crossing his arms, there was mirth in his voice, allowing Johnny to know that he wasn't serious.

“Oh, so  _ you _ can come to  _ my _ work, but I can’t go to yours?” He questioned.

“The difference is  _ I _ didn't know you worked there.” Ten quipped back.

Johnny couldn't argue with that one, “Touché”

“So what can I get you Johnny, or are you just here to hold up the queue?” 

Letting out a loud laugh, Johnny lent his head forward, shaking it slightly. “Sorry, yeah I’ll have an iced americano thanks.” 

Ten took down the order smiling when he took Johnny’s cash. “Feel free to take a seat, I’ll bring it over once it's done,” Johnny thanked him, stepping out of the line and falling back to his table. 

Even with the long queue of people, it didn't take long for Johnny’s order to arrive. He was just flicking through his phone when he heard the screech of a chair being pulled out, and two iced coffees were placed down. 

“Do you mind if I join you? It’s my break and as you're here I thought we could catch up?” 

Johnny looked up to see Ten, He was stood, adorned in a dark green apron, white shirt and black jeans. He smiled at Johnny, making himself comfortable in the chair opposite. Along with the two iced coffees, Ten had a grilled sandwich and a sweet pastry. “Make yourself at home,” Johnny smiled in return, motioning to the spot Ten had chosen to inhabit.

The two of them sat in comfortable silence, Ten digging into his lunch, and Johnny sipping tentatively on his drink. They both paused when their eyes met across the table — Johnny quickly darting his away and Ten clearing his throat. “So what are you doing on this side of town? It’s kinda far away from your normal territory. Or... are you just here to see me?” Johnny almost spluttered into his coffee, luckily regaining his composure before he completely embarrassed himself. 

Underneath Ten’s fluttering eyelashes, was a devilish grin, Johnny decided to match the vibe: “Well, I was looking around for inspiration, but now that I've run into my favourite model, I guess I can stop…”

“Favourite model?” Ten scoffed, rolling his eyes, “If I’m your favourite, how come I've only been asked to do one shoot?” He crossed his arms putting on an exaggerated scowl. 

“Oh sorry, I wasn't talking about you?” Johnny put on the most serious tone of voice he could muster, “I was talking about another stupidly attractive but strangely short man…” He pointed over Ten’s shoulder, pretending to wave to the imaginary model. 

Ten huffed out a breath, resisting the urge to turn in the direction that Johnny was looking and instead, fixing him with a glare. “Well, if you know so many people here then maybe I  _ don't _ need to keep you company.” He made no sign of moving as he spoke, but he did give a halfhearted kick to Johnny’s leg under the table. “Anyway, I think you'll find I'm not short, you’re just freakishly tall.” 

In front of him, Johnny threw his head forward in a loud laugh, eyes crinkling when he looked up to meet Ten’s gaze, “Okay, you’re right, not strangely short, just stupidly attractive then.” 

Although Johnny had been laughing while he spoke, Ten hadn't missed that last bit, cheeks heating up, much to his annoyance. He had purposely ignored that part of his statement last time, why did Johnny have to go and say it again. 

Okay, Ten wasn't stupid, he knew he was attractive — a fact that he would normally use to his advantage. However, for some reason hearing the words leave Johnny’s mouth sounded too sincere. It reminded Ten of the moment on the subway, he had looked up to see a pair of warm brown eyes gazing at him, in a way someone may appreciate a piece of art. At first, he had felt embarrassed, shifting on his seat and busying himself with his phone, but once the man had ripped his gaze away, Ten had found he missed the attention, almost wishing to catch his eye, make contact in some way, just to capture him again. It had taken for Ten to get up and leave for those eyes to land back on him. Their gaze had met, a moment that Ten allowed himself to relish. A brief encounter with a stranger that he would never meet again. 

Or at least that's what he thought, until he entered the dance studio for his evening session, almost a month after their original meeting, and found himself staring into the same soft brown eyes. This time being revealed from behind a large camera. 

Now, some weeks later, here they were. Face to face, enjoying friendly conversation over an iced coffee. Ten suppressed a smile, shaking his head slightly at the other, and willing the red of his cheeks to go down. 

On the other side of the table, Johnny noticed the blush, quieting down and feeling his own face grow warm — did he really just call Ten attractive? Twice? 

A shy smile slipped onto the other's face. Johnny was about to open his mouth, say something more, words on the tip of his tongue, when they were interrupted: “Ten, hey there you are,” It was a young woman, also dressed in the same coffee shop uniform, “Do you mind taking over, I haven't had my break yet and Jamie called in sick…” She surveyed the situation, looking from Ten to Johnny, and then back again. “Sorry if I'm interrupting something…” 

Ten shot up from his seat, blush deepening as he scooped up the finished food and drinks before turning his attention on his colleague, “Ah I'm sorry, I hadn't realised what time it was, I’ll be over in just a second.” Seeming satisfied with his answers, the barista left, sending one last glance in Johnny’s direction then walking over to the staff area. 

Shooting him an apologetic smile, Ten turned his attention back to Johnny: “I've really got to get back to work.” 

“It's fine, I should probably get going as well. Thanks for keeping me company this afternoon.” 

At that Ten had smiled brightly, telling him to come back whenever he was passing by. 

Johnny left a tip and waved to Ten (who was back behind the counter now), exiting Procaffeination and making his way to his own job. 

***

For the rest of that day, Johnny found his head was full of thoughts about Ten. With a strange longing to be back in his presence, comfortably sharing in silence over a cup of coffee. 

Kiya had commented halfway through his shift about Johnny’s unfocused behaviour, asking why his head was in the clouds more than usual today. Johnny had just shrugged apologetically, flashing a bashful smile before getting himself back to the task at hand. 

However, his focus didn’t last long: while stacking vinyl into its correct place, Johnny would often come across a song or album that would have worked well for Ten’s dance, mentally kicking himself for not thinking about it sooner, but still noting it down for future projects. 

Noticing his distraction, once again, Kiya sent him out for a smoke break, telling him to take some time and clear his head. 

So Johnny did just that, leaning against the wall of the shop, he lit up, stowing away his lighter and inhaling deeply. He let the smoke flow into his body, enjoying the calm that came with it. Removing the stick from his mouth he flicked the ash off the end and exhaled. A stream of smoke left his nose. 

Since coming to New York City, Johnny had practically cut his smoking habit in two. Partly to do with the expense that came with the habit (the money he earned mostly went on living costs in the city now), but also to do with the extra time he was spending with Ten. 

Most of the people he hung around didn't give a shit if he wrecked his lungs, some (i.e Yuta) even happily partaking in the activity along with him. But for whatever reason, Ten had taken a real disliking to it, actively avoiding him if he was even smelling of cigarette smoke. In the end, Johnny had just taken to leaving his stuff at home, not wanting to have the distraction around when he was with him anyway. 

Maybe this was a good thing, smoking was never supposed to become a full-time habit after all. 

Realising he wasn't going to get much work done for a while, Johnny decided to shoot off a text to Ten’s number. 

_ It was really great seeing you today, sorry if I distracted you from your work, hope I didn’t get you in trouble or anything!  _

He was just finishing off his second cigarette when he got a text in return:

_ Ten: _

_ Hey, don't worry they were chill about it, all they wanted to know was who my date was…  _

_ But thank you, I had a good time seeing you as well! _

Johnny almost choked on the smoke he was inhaling. Did it really look like they were on a date? Thinking more about it, he could kinda see it, turning up at Ten’s work and stealing him away for half an hour, yeah, to anyone watching that would look kind of suspicious. What shocked him the most, however, was how the more he thought about it, the more he realised that he was completely comfortable with it, maybe even wishful. “Fuck…” He breathed out, stubbing out the remainder of his cigarette, “I think I like him…” 

With the new information in place, Johnny looked to distract himself, getting back to his job, and putting all his energy into work. Kiya seemed pleased with his change in attitude, welcoming him back. 

Johnny forced a smile while he grabbed a box and got stacking. In his head, however, he knew he was further away than ever, mind spinning over his new realisation. 

***

Johnny returned to his apartment after his shift, dramatically throwing himself onto the sofa. Dongyoung and Yuta, who were currently cuddling on one of the armchairs, looked up, giving a puzzled look to their friend. “Something wrong Johnny?” Dongyoung asked, shifting slightly to turn his attention towards him. 

Knowing there was no use in lying to his roommates, Johnny didn't hesitate before speaking: “I have a thing for Ten…” He ran his hands through his hair letting his arms flop to his side and looking to his friends for help. 

“Okay,” Dongyoung acknowledged. 

At the same time as Yuta laughed: “No shit.” Seeing the two pairs of eyes land on him, Yuta continued, “I mean, I thought it was obvious: he's totally your type, you could hardly look away from him that day in the studio, and since the beginning of the month you two have been meeting up a hell of a lot.” 

Johnny groaned, “Yeah I know, it sounds stupid right? But it's somehow more than that, I’ve always found him attractive, that’s obvious, but, I don't know how to explain it… It was more about really wanting to take his picture—”

“—Aesthetic attraction.” Dongyoung jumped in 

“Yeah I guess, but then once we started talking we were both quite flirty with each other—“ 

“Yeah, I’d say.” Johnny shot Yuta a glare for interrupting him. 

“—and that made me realise that I wouldn't mind seeing him naked you know?” Dongyoung let out a snort while Yuta whooped loudly. “But today,” He continued, “I stumbled across his work, and he ate his lunch with me. We had a really enjoyable time. 

However, after I left apparently his colleagues wanted to know who his date was, and since telling me that I realised that I really wouldn't mind taking him out on a real date, being something important to him.” He finished, waiting for one of his friends to speak. 

“So are you gonna do anything about it?” Yuta asked. 

Johnny considered his options, head filling up with different outcomes and possibilities, “I don't know.” He admitted eventually. 

“Well, although I may not have much knowledge in this area, if I were you, I think the best place to start would be to maybe tell him how you feel,” Dongyoung replied after a bit of thought. 

Johnny knew he was right, how could he expect Ten to know how he felt if he didn't communicate it? However, he also knew Ten. And in particular, the way he closes himself off at the first sign of discomfort. “I don't want to scare him away…” Is what he eventually replied. 

“So maybe let him make the first move, I don't want to get your hopes up or anything but, I would say he’s interested in you as well, just give him time.” Yuta gave him a pat on the arm before he moved himself over to the fridge and grabbed three beers.

***

A couple of days later, Johnny had a day off. He was lounging on his bed, absentmindedly scrolling through his phone when he received a message notification.

_ Ten: _

_ Hey Johnny boy, are you free to meet up today? It's great weather and I just thought we could go and take photos somewhere. What do you think? _

Johnny was surprised to see the others name, sitting up and replying quickly: 

_ Johnny: _

_ Yeah, it’s my day off today  _

_ I’m free, did you have anywhere in mind? _

Fifteen minutes later, Johnny was stepping off the subway. He readjusted the bag on his shoulder before walking up the stairs and exiting the station. Looking around, his eyes were drawn to the waving form of Ten walking toward him. “Heya,” The shorter called to him, as they came into speaking distance. Today he was dressed in a loose t-shirt and comfortable looking denim jeans. Around his neck was his own 35mm film camera. Johnny was surprised to see it, not realising that Ten enjoyed photography as well. 

“Hey, I didn't know you shoot film?” He stated matter-of-factly. 

“Yeah, that's why I suggested meeting up. Thought we could both do some shooting together, instead of me just being the model the whole time.” Ten explained, reaching for his camera and snapping a photograph of Johnny. 

Flushing, at what would probably be a really ugly picture of him, Johnny felt slightly stupid at his line of questioning. “yeah sorry for being obvious…” 

“Don’t sweat it, you're cute when you get flustered.” Johnny gaped slightly at the younger, reddening further, “You coming? Or are we just gonna stand around here all day?” Johnny was brought back to reality, noticing the bright smile on Ten’s face and following after him. 

“Where are we going then?” 

The two of them ended up in a market place, shopping and shooting at the same time. Johnny found Ten liked to take pictures of him, often looking up to find the camera pointed in Johnny’s direction. He would pull a face in return, smiling when a laugh would reverberate from behind the camera and the shutter would click — capturing that moment forever. 

For once, Johnny focused more on the location they were in. Photographing the small stalls of the market and the people who inhabited them. Some of the pictures also included Ten: either on purpose (capturing the other when he was unaware) or because Ten had set it upon himself to photobomb as many images as he could. Johnny would just laugh each time, taking the picture anyway. 

Normally this would get on his nerves, but for some reason with Ten, Johnny didn't care at all. 

Towards the end of the afternoon, the pair made themselves comfortable in a cafe. They sat in the outdoor area, enjoying the sun on their backs and taking a break from walking around in the heat. Ten had finished his roll of film a while ago, using up the last couple of shots on a picture of a pigeon and a probably very out of focus selfie of them together. Johnny still had a few shots to go, planning on shooting them over the rest of the day. 

“Where do you get your film developed?” Ten asked, mumbling around a bagel he had just bitten into. 

Johnny finished his own mouthful before replying: “NYPhotographic, it’s a small shop close to my apartment.” 

“What are the prices like?”

“They're good, more reasonable than most the other shops around here. Where do you develop yours?” 

“I usually send mine off, so it gets pretty expensive. Would you mind taking me to your shop?” 

Johnny agreed, promising to take him there once they had finished eating. It wasn't long after that, that the two of them were slipping back into the now busy subway and making their way towards the right line. “It’s only two stops…” Johnny whispered while they waited. The platform was already pretty full, with more people trying to squeeze their way on. He snapped a picture of the crowd, tall stature making it so that he could see over most of the heads. 

Ten huffed slightly from where he stood, craning his head to try and catch a glimpse of the tracks. “Do you not like crowds?” Johnny asked, noticing the other's behaviour. From his position behind Ten, he could see the amount the younger was shifting from foot to foot. 

“Try getting on my level, and  _ not _ feeling slightly claustrophobic in a big crowd.” 

Even though Johnny couldn't see his face, he could tell the younger was glaring. “Okay, good point.” He chuckled slightly. 

Ten huffed again, but this time more for the dramatic effect, “To be honest it’s not even the crowd that I dislike, It’s just not being able to see what's happening around me.” He admitted quietly. 

Placing his hands on Ten’s shoulders, Johnny gave a reassuring squeeze, trying to work some of the tension out of the other's body, “Well that's okay then, I’ll be your eyes.” Finally, Ten let out a laugh, turning his face now to look up at Johnny. He shook his head slightly, before turning back to face the front — stance slightly more relaxed. 

After that, Johnny began describing the scene around him. Telling Ten about the people he could see and the things they were doing. Ten would laugh along, asking questions to further enhance the mental image. 

It wasn't long before the telltale rush of air began and the subway lights became visible, “It’s here.” Johnny confirmed as the vehicle pulled to a stop in front of them. The doors opened and a stream of people flooded the platform. Johnny could feel the surge of commuters around him, each person moving to a doorway. Holding onto Ten’s shoulders, he steered the two of them through the easiest path, allowing Ten to step into the car before he followed. 

As expected, the ride was very cramped. Johnny anchored himself into a corner, close to the doors they would be exiting. Ten followed closely, standing with some space between them. 

More and more people entered the car, seemingly finding room, where there most definitely was none. Before the train even started moving, that space Ten had put between them had pretty much disappeared. The doors finally closed and the train set off. 

This was the closest proximity the two of them had ever been. Johnny couldn't breath — Ten was face to face with him, body pressed dangerously close. He was avoiding all eye contact (something Johnny was slightly relieved about), face scanning around the different advertisements instead. 

The train slowed and a small number of people left, while a larger group got on. The crowd jostled a bit, trying to make room for the extra people. 

As they began their journey once more, a person, still making their way through the car, stumbled: knocking hard into Ten’s back and propelling him forward. 

He landed directly onto Johnny — their heads colliding slightly with the force of impact. 

Moving to brace him, Johnny’s hands instinctively went to Ten’s hips. He froze. Ten’s own hands were resting flat against his chest, his breath ghosting against his jaw. Johnny suppressed a shiver, hoping the other man couldn't feel how fast his heart was beating. As this thought crossed his mind, Ten looked up. Their eyes met, a warm feeling settling in his chest as both their faces stained pink — the closeness making him dizzy. 

If someone had told Johnny two months ago that he’d be in this position with the beautiful stranger from the subway — he would have laughed in their face wondering what fantasy of his they had stumbled into. Yet here he was, pushed against the wall of the subway, Ten, practically nestled between his legs, hand still pressed against his chest. Johnny felt as if he could combust. 

So wrapped up in what was happening, he almost missed as they came to a stop. It was only the soft pull of Ten’s hand on his that dragged him back to reality. The two of them exited together — Ten not dropping his hold on Johnny until they were out in the street. “So, which way to the developers?” 

They walked through the familiar streets, Johnny pointing out all the good shops and the places that did the best food, promising to treat Ten to a pizza there one day. Neither of them spoke about the subway. However, Ten’s hands seemed a lot less shy than before, happily gripping Johnny’s arm from time to time. 

Johnny entered the shop first, the little bell sounding above them. As always, standing behind the desk was his favourite shop owner. She smiled brightly at them, raising her eyebrows when she caught sight of Ten. 

“Ah this place is so cute, I can see why you like it here.” Ten exclaimed, making the shop owner chuckle from behind the counter. 

“Well, I'm glad you think that.” Ten seemed slightly shocked about getting a reply from a member of staff, shooting her a slightly embarrassed smile, “How can I help you both?” 

“Hey, Ten here would like to get a film developed so I recommended this shop to him,” Johnny explained, ignoring the knowing look she sent him. 

“Do you know what process you need?” She asked kindly, turning her attention back to Ten. 

He looked slightly lost for a second, glancing to Johnny for help. “What do you normally get?” 

“I go for dev and scan only. It’s a lot cheaper that way and means you can choose which pictures, if any, you want to get printed later.” 

“I guess I’ll go for that one then.” 

The lady nodded, pulling out a bag and writing down the information, “Do you have a memory stick with you?” Ten’s eyes widened slightly, pulling out his keys — no memory stick in sight. 

“Damn…” He cursed under his breath. 

“It's alright, you can use mine,” Johnny jumped in, placing his stick on the table and smiling reassuringly at Ten. The younger thanked him, leaving the rest of his information with the shop owner before agreeing to pick it up when he was next in the area. 

As they were in the shop, Johnny decided to pick up another pack of Polaroid film. 

While waiting for the transaction to go through, Ten busied himself with looking at the cameras. His eyes scanned over the different models, reading their labels and taking in the prices. Johnny walked over to join him, placing his film in his pocket as he did so. “They’re pretty cool, right? I’ve always loved old cameras.” 

Ten hummed, looking over them again before speaking, “Do you have any of these?” Nodding, Johnny pointed out the Polaroid 600, reminding Ten of the shoot they did before. “What about the other ones I've seen you using?” He asked. 

“Well, I've got my DSLR, which I used for the headshots that time, my Kiev 60 and my trusty Canon AF35M.” He finished, patting the camera around his neck. 

“Can I see them?” 

“I've photographed you with all of them before, you’ve already seen them.” 

“Yeah but that doesn't count, I've never actually held one before, or found out how it worked.” Ten seemed so eager and excited to find out more about his photography, and who was Johnny to turn down an opportunity to hang out with Ten anyway? He agreed, slightly excited at the notion of showing Ten around his apartment. 

Pleased with his answers, Ten linked their hands again and pulled him out of the shop. Johnny didn't miss the fond chuckle from the owner as they left. 

***

They made their way into Johnny’s apartment. The door was locked — just how he’d left it, meaning none of his roommates had come home yet. 

He unlocked it, holding it open for Ten to step in. “Welcome to my place,” Ten looked around the room, taking in the furnishings and belongings hanging around. 

“This is very you.” 

Johnny only smiled, moving past Ten and opening his bedroom door. “I keep my cameras in here.” He explained, walking in and placing his case on the desk. Ten entered after him, walking straight to the bed and making himself comfortable. “Is there anything you want to see first?” 

Considering the question Ten answered, “How about the big one, the Kiev 60?” He questioned, slightly unsure about putting the correct name to the correct camera.

Nodding, Johnny removed the heaviest camera from his bag and carefully passed it to Ten. The other was taken aback by the weight, eyes widening slightly as he hosted the camera up to his face and looked through the viewfinder. “I can’t see anything?” He questioned, pulling his eye away before looking again. 

“Try winding the shutter,” Johnny instructed from his place at the desk. He watched as Ten did so, smiling to himself when he finally saw the image through the viewfinder. Johnny quickly snapped a picture of Ten, wanting to preserve this moment. 

“Shit this camera is heavy, how do you lug it around all day?” Johnny shrugged, explaining how he didn’t really notice it. 

Ten pressed the shutter on the Kiev, laughing at the loud sound it created, “Now that sound I remember — you, taking creep shots of me while I warmed up.” He was meaning it in a jokey way, lowering the camera and smiling cheekily at Johnny. 

“Sorry I can't help when inspiration strikes.” Johnny quipped back, liking the way his comment created a faint blush on Ten’s cheeks. 

They spent the next hour or so going through Johnny’s cameras. Ten listened well to his explanations, asking questions and quickly learning his way around a more complex camera. Johnny had allowed him to take some test shots on his DSLR, easily teaching him how to shoot with manual settings. Ten had taken some decent pictures, excitedly showing Johnny each one. 

It was at that moment Johnny realised just how much he wanted to kiss the younger.

His cheeks were pink, lips stretched wide and eyes gazing happily at Johnny. To put it simply he was beautiful. Lifting his camera to his face, Johnny quickly captured the image in front of him, being slightly surprised when the film wound itself back into the canister. 

“Why’d you waste the last picture on me?” 

“A photograph of you is never a waste.” The sincerity in his voice shocked himself as well as Ten. They were sat side by side on his bed now, cameras practically forgotten between them.

Johnny's heart was hammering in his chest, the same feeling from the subway settling over him. His eyes scanned over Ten’s face, taking in his beautiful features. 

Because of how they were sitting Johnny could see every eyelash, the curve of his nose, the natural pout of his lips. 

His eyes fluttered shut, leaning forward — giving in to temptation. 

“I should probably go,” Ten stood up from the bed quickly, jostling the cameras slightly as he left. He strode over to the door, avoiding eye contact, the colour red spreading up from his neck. “Thanks for showing me your cameras though.” 

From his position still on the bed, Johnny blinked up at him. Embarrassment of his own, replacing the excitement from before. He awkwardly stood up, forcing a tight smile and showing Ten out of the apartment. Once they had said their goodbyes, and Johnny had made his way back upstairs, he collapsed face down on his bed — ears burning. He should have listened to Yuta and waited for Ten to make a move. 

But then again what if his friend was wrong? What if the shorter man really wasn’t interested in him at all? These doubts and questions filled his head. He rolled over onto his back, deciding to put his cameras away before heading out for a smoke — after the embarrassing end to the day, Johnny felt like he had earned one. 

  
  



	5. Red Shirt

It was a warm afternoon. The park nearest to their apartment was busy — families having picnics, kids playing happily, workers taking a break to lounge in the sun. As May continued towards its end, the month had gotten progressively hotter. 

Johnny, Yuta and Dongyoung had escaped the uncomfortably stuffy confines of their apartment, seeking a change of scenery. That’s how the three of them found themselves stretching out in a patch of sunlight. Johnny had his back pressed into the grass, head propped up by his arms and cigarette sticking out of his mouth. All things considered, he was feeling rather content. 

It had been five days since his catch up with Ten. Five days of silence. The younger had made it pretty clear that he wanted space from Johnny. Choosing not to reply to his messages and not making any effort to meet up. 

Now, Johnny wasn’t stupid, he knew how to take a hint, stepping back and giving Ten the space he needed. However, as understanding as he tried to be, he couldn’t help but feel slightly frustrated: if he could just talk to Ten, apologise for moving too quickly, get the other's point of view — then maybe, just maybe, they could move past this. 

He sighed quietly. 

Over to the side, Dongyoung was going through lines with Yuta, he had an audition coming up soon. The two of them created a background chatter that Johnny was able to zone out of. Closing his eyes and exhaling smoke out of his nose. 

However, his relaxation was soon shattered as the stick between his teeth was rudely removed. “Hey! What the—” The sound of his friends' laughter reverberated through the ground, his eyes snapped open, coming face to face with a smirking Ten. 

“You’ll thank me when you're old.” He explained, chuckling slightly at the horror on the other's face as he stubbed it out. Johnny sat up quickly, head almost colliding with Ten’s (that was still hovering over his). 

“Ten, what are you doing here?” 

“Nice weather, nice park,” he shrugged noncommittally, “why wouldn’t I be here?” He sat down next to Johnny absentmindedly pulling at the grass in front of him. 

Johnny felt himself staring again, mind suddenly drawing a blank on what to do. Yuta was making wide-eyed gestures at him, egging him on to say something —  _ anything _ .

Luckily for them all, Dongyoung had noted the situation, clearing his throat and bringing the attention to him. “So no Taeyong or Gem today?” He casually asked, eyes flicking between the new arrival and his script. 

“No, not today. Gem’s catching up with Kiya and Taeyong’s running a dance session. So I thought it would be best to pick up my film,” he waved the bag that was in his grip, “then I saw you guys and decided I’d try and disturb the peace a little.” There was a small pause, “So what are you up to?” 

At that Yuta jumped into action: “Well, me and Dongie were just going over some lines, but you’ve just reminded me,” he looked at Dongyoung, putting on his best acting face, and willing the other to go along, “We were going to take part in extra practice today.” 

Taking the hint, Dongyoung nodded along enthusiastically, “Yes, that’s right, how did we forget?” Johnny rolled his eyes, knowing full well that Ten wasn’t buying any of this. Sure enough, the other man was sat with a perplexed expression, eyebrows raised at the strange behaviour. 

“What about Johnny?” Ten queried. 

“Well,” Three pairs of eyes fell on him, “weren’t you saying something about wanting to do a photoshoot in this nice weather... maybe Ten could be your model?” Johnny sent Yuta a glair. 

“Well sure...” Ten didn’t sound at all ‘sure’, “but we’ve already done a shoot like this...” 

Yuta waved a hand dismissively, being pulled to his feet by a happy looking Dongyoung, “Ah come on guys I’m sure you can come up with something. I don’t know, how about the roof at our place, or maybe the fire escape... Use those creative brains of yours.” 

“Johnny, we’ll see you at the studio later yeah?” Dongyoung asked — arm linked tentatively with their other friend, ready to pull him along. 

“Sure yeah, I’ll be there.” A slightly dumbfounded Johnny replied, eyeing his standing friends, who were just about to abandon him, with a look of disbelief. 

They left quickly after that, leaving the two remaining people to watch them go. “I don't think your friends like me…” Ten spoke once they were out of earshot. 

Johnny scoffed slightly, “No, they love you, I mean it.” He exclaimed seeing Ten’s disbelief, “They’ve just got a weird way of showing it.” Ten didn't give a reply, instead, fiddling with the bag of film in his lap. “How’d picking up the film go by the way?”

The subject change helped Ten relax a little, pulling his focus onto the new topic, “Yeah, it went well thanks. Although the shop owner seemed a little surprised to see me alone. Your film is ready to be collected by the way.” 

Nodding while Ten spoke, Johnny scanned his eyes over the bag, absentmindedly reading over Ten’s information. On the tip of his tongue was a question, something he had been wanting to ask for a while now: “Is your real name Ten?” He accidentally blurted out after looking at the neat scripture written on the side of the paper bag. He cursed himself mentally at the slip-up. 

Luckily, instead of shutting him out, as Johnny had expected, Ten just laughed. “You're really full of questions today aren’t you?” There was no time for Johnny to apologise before he continued, “No it’s not, my real name is actually Chittaphon, but I tend not to use it here — Americans have a habit of butchering the pronunciation…” He raised a challenging eyebrow at Johnny. 

“Chittaphon…” He let the foreign syllables roll off his tongue, trying to copy them correctly, “Last name?” He continued, feeling strangely confident. 

“Leechaiyapornkul.”

“Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul — Johnny Suh, or Suh Youngho if you want to know my Korean name.” He stuck out a hand, pretending to introduce himself for the first time.

Ten let out a loud bark of laughter, carefully taking his hand and giving it a firm shake. “Well, Youngho, how about we pick up your film and then get this shoot done, yeah?” He questioned, tipping his head in the direction of the street. 

Agreeing, Johnny leapt to his feet — pulling Ten up with him. The younger was laughing louder now, head tipping back.

Somewhere in the back of his mind, Johnny remembered that he was supposed to be talking about what happened the last time they met. Instead, he pushed that away — again, not wishing to bring the mood down. 

*** 

Picking up the film was quick and easy. The shop owner was pleased to see them together again, commenting such as they were waiting to pay. They had both exchanged looks, blushing slightly at her words. Johnny, quickly clearing his throat and changing the line of conversation. Their reactions just made her smile more widely. 

Then it was the long seven flights of stairs to the top of the apartment. They burst through the top door together, stepping out into the bright sunlight. 

Johnny had grabbed a few things that they might need on the way, stuffing them haphazardly into a bag. 

Now on the roof, Ten looked around — a smile still etched onto his face. He scanned the area before his eyes settled on Johnny, “So, what did you have in mind?”

“I thought,” Johnny started, selecting the lens he wanted and clicking it onto his DSLR, “that maybe you could show me some of the dance you've been working on?” He looked up at Ten, trying to gauge his reaction. 

“Sure thing,” He easily moved to get himself into the starting position.

“Oh wait, before you begin,” Johnny rushed over to his bag, pulling out a short-sleeved shirt, “do you mind wearing this?”

He chucked the garment to Ten, who caught it with ease, holding it out in front of him and inspecting it. “Is this yours?” 

“Um yeah,” Johnny shrugged, “I just thought the flowing material would work well for the photographs, you don't have to wear it.” He quickly assured, not wanting to pressure Ten into something he was unhappy with. 

Nodding, the other spoke: “Okay, so do you want me to wear it over my t-shirt or not?” 

Johnny hadn't thought this far ahead. His mind went blank, not sure what answer he should give. Ten was currently wearing an oversized purple long-sleeved t-shirt, that was tucked into a pair of rolled denim jeans. The colours would most definitely clash if he just wore it over the top, but Johnny didn’t want to make him uncomfortable. 

“Your choice.” He finally managed, trying  _ not _ to imagine Ten’s bare torso in front of him. 

He didn't have to try for long, as with no hesitation, Ten pulled the top off over his head, lean body exposed. Johnny didn't have time to react, eyes unconsciously falling on his frame before he forced himself to turn away.

“What do you think?” Ten asked moments later, making Johnny look in his direction once more. The question could almost be innocent if it wasn't for the raised eyebrow and pointed stare he was giving him. 

To put it simply, Ten looked hot. The shirt was unsparingly too big, hanging loosely over his frame. The buttons at the top were open revealing a large expanse of honey skin that stretched from his neck, over his collarbones before continuing downwards.

Johnny swallowed. The dusty red, yellow and green floral pattern swirled over the fabric colours only adding to the sight in front of him. “You look… good.” He finally spoke, hoping his voice didn't come across as too strained. 

If Ten had noticed a difference, he thankfully didn't comment, instead, walking back to his starting position. “How do you want me to do this then?”

“I was thinking you could just dance, and I’d walk around taking pictures — something simple.” 

Humming in understanding, Ten fished out his phone, tapping it a couple of times before music began to play through the speaker. He turned it up loud before placing it on the table and beginning. 

The music played and Ten moved. His body, fluid like a liquid but sharp when it needed to be, travelled around the rooftop. Contorting and flowing, twisting and turning, he expressed himself fully through the music. 

Johnny was stunned, unable to move from where he stood, eyes fixed on the man in front of him. He’d never seen Ten dance like this. 

A large swell of emotions hit Johnny square in the chest as he watched. He could feel everything the other was portraying. Heart, pounding in his ears. 

Occasionally, the shirt would rise with the movements — exposing his flat, soft stomach. This time Johnny was unable to look away, completely captivated.

His camera was gripped tightly in his hands, but not once did he make an attempt to lift it — not wanting to miss a single second of the performance. 

The music came to an end. Ten moved over to pause it, panting slightly. “You didn't take any photographs?” he stated, resting a hand on his hip and cocking an eyebrow in confusion. 

With that statement aimed at him, Johnny came back to his senses: “I… no, I guess I didn’t.” He loosened the grip on his camera, looking directly at Ten, “I was completely mesmerised by you.” He admitted. 

Ten’s face turned a subtle shade of pink. “Well, let's go once more then, try to keep up will ya!” He winked at Johnny spinning around quickly and hitting play on the music. 

Without any time to react, Johnny threw himself into action, forcing his body to move. 

This time around, by the end of the dance, he had successfully captured the beautiful movements. 

Watching the dance through the first time had ended up being beneficial, it meant he was able to follow the flow of the routine without getting in the way and disrupting it. 

When the song finished, they collapsed into the chairs, reviewing the pictures that Johnny had taken. 

He had focused on capturing movement and colour, wanting the images to come across as almost abstract at the first look. 

He had also focused on emotion: shooting low and using the bright sunlight to his advantage — casting dramatic shadows over Ten’s features. 

Glancing up from the camera, Johnny saw a faraway look in Ten’s eyes, a small smile appearing. His heart beat a little faster, hoping that he had done the dance justice. 

Next to him, Ten nodded — more to himself than anyone — eyes finally meeting Johnny’s: “You get it.”

***

“What time is it?”

“Uh, about 5:40…”

“Oh shit! Shit, crap, dammit I got distracted!” 

Johnny sat up from where they had been lounging mere moments before. “What's wrong?”

After they finished the dance photoshoot, the two of them had taken some more pictures together, pretty much leading off from their last catch up (minus the almost kiss). 

This time Johnny had allowed Ten to use his camera on the roof, letting him experiment with exposure settings and lenses, explaining what each thing did. 

Following on from that, the two of them had ended up on the fire escape. Ten’s had his legs crossed, while Johnny was dangling his through the bars. 

Together they had sat, chatting, relaxing and watching the afternoon sun turn to a soft evening glow. Everything was peaceful, a strange feeling settled in Johnny’s chest:  _ this was good  _

However, as the time was announced, Ten shot up, practically leaping through the open window and grabbing his stuff. “ _ Fuck _ , I am so late,” He explained laughing out of disbelief, “I was supposed to be at the dance studio over half an hour ago.”

“Oh shit!” Johnny rushed into the room after Ten, closing the window behind him, “It’s alright, it only takes about ten minutes from here, I’ll come with you and explain how you were helping me out with a shoot.” 

“Would that be okay?” Ten asked, he was pacing slightly, biting at his thumbnail, “I wouldn't want you to go out of your way for nothing, and I don't really need you to make up excuses for me…” He hesitated, “but I’d feel a bit better with you as back up.” 

A smile formed on Johnny’s face, and he nodded enthusiastically, “Really it’s no problem, I was going to go in today anyway, so now is as good a time as any.” Ten breathed out a sigh of relief. 

They had left quickly then, taking two steps at a time and practically sprinting down the street. 

Ten minutes passed and sure enough, they had made it to the studio. 

Crashing through the doors, the pair distracted the dances, making them look up at the commotion. “I’m so sorry I’m late!” 

“Ten, about time. The group has been running through what you've taught them so far, but we can’t really progress without the choreographer.” A stern-looking lady spoke up. She was one of the senior dances — the person in charge of who does what, and when they should do it. 

She had been the main reason Ten was selected to lead this dance, and Johnny could Tell that he didn't want to let her down. 

“I’m sorry this is my fault,” He stepped in, giving an awkward wave to the teacher, “Ten was helping me out with a photoshoot, it kind of overran…” He trailed off, her icy gaze landing on him. Off to his side, he could hear the snickers of his friends, he decided to ignore them. 

“And you are?” 

“Johnny, I’m a photographer, I've done some shoots here before… Sorry again for keeping you waiting today.”

“Well, Johnny, I’ll trust you won't distract Ten like this in the future. Is there any reason that you're here now, or can I expect you to be leaving soon?”

Johnny blanched slightly at her words, not expecting her rudeness. “Oh I… I’m uh—”

“Actually, he’s here to support his friends.” Ten jumped in, noticing the lack of words coming out of Johnny’s mouth, “Yuta and Dongyoung invited him to watch.” 

She seemed to accept that, giving them both a sharp nod before asking Ten to take over for her. 

Johnny let out the breath he was holding and made his way over to the seated area. 

Neither one of them noticed that Ten was still dressed in Johnny’s shirt. 

  
  



	6. A Night To Remember

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiya, here's another chapter. Hope you like it!
> 
> Just a heads up, there is mild drug use in this chapter. Nothing too intense, but I just thought I'd let you know ~
> 
> Thanks for reading so far!

“Johnny, you ready?” Yuta called from outside his door, knocking a couple of times to get his attention. “Dongie and I are good to go.” 

Groaning slightly to himself, Johnny grabbed his denim jacket and left his bedroom. 

Waiting in the living room, were his two friends. Dongyoung was checking his phone, while Yuta tapped his foot impatiently. “About time man.” He sighed, “Come on, tonights going to be fun!” 

The group were headed to a party. After another dance practice had ended a couple of days ago, Johnny had been dragged out for drinks with his roommates and a few other dancers. One club and three or four drinks later, one girl mentioned a party that was being thrown at her apartment — naturally, they had all been invited, Johnny included. At the time, he had halfheartedly accepted, deciding to just bale out when the night arrived. However, his friends had other ideas. 

“Of course we’re going, I wouldn't miss out on a free party!” Dongyoung had stated when Johnny had shot him the question over takeout. 

“Yeah man, this is New York City we’re talking about, you don't just turn down an opportunity like this.”

“I don’t know though guys, this isn't really my scene.” — The statement was neither true or false. Sure, once in the not so distant past Johnny would have jumped at the mere mention of a party. His college days were full of going out, getting wasted, taking god knows what…. Getting up sometime in the next 48hours with no recollection of his night out. But he had left that all behind. NYC had been his fresh start, and so far so good — he could remember every day he’d been here. That wasn't something he wanted to break. 

“Well, that's lucky then,” Yuta brought him out of his thoughts, “parties aren’t really Ten’s scene either, you can just keep him company…” At the mention of the others name, Johnny looked up, “See, doesn't seem too bad now does it?” Both his friends sent him knowing looks, Johnny just rolled his eyes, moving to his bedroom to get ready. 

Even with the knowledge that he was going to see Ten, Johnny still felt reluctant when it came to leaving. He checked his pockets, making sure his keys, phone, lighter and packet of cigarettes were in place, then swung his 35mm camera around his neck. His friends were already in the corridor, much more eager to leave. He locked up, letting out a quiet sigh before following them down the stairs. 

Around twenty minutes later, the three of them were walking up to the party location. It was hard to miss. The apartment block was positioned in the nicer part of town. There was a grassy area surrounding the building, people were lounging around outside, standing in groups or walking to and from the building. Through the main entrance, music could be heard — bass blasting through a large speaker system. 

It was packed. 

Giving himself an excuse to stay outside and away from the crush of the dance floor, Johnny placed a cigarette between his lips, lighting it and taking a long drag. To his side Dongyoung sighed, obviously disappointed by his action, grabbing hold of Yuta’s arm before he could be tempted to do the same. “Right we’re gonna head in. You should join us in a minute or something Johnny…” 

Yuta looked slightly reluctant to leave him, wanting to steal a free smoke. But even he took one look at the inside of the building and agreed to go with Dongyoung. 

“Yeah, I’ll come and find you guys later, don't get too pissed!” He stated, exhaling the smoke as he spoke. “I’ll probs just chill out here for a bit though, you know mill around, take some candid shots…” he shrugged, placing the cigarette back in his mouth and lifting his camera. As if to make his point, he took a picture of his friends, chuckling slightly at their expressions. 

They both shrugged in turn, shaking their heads slightly and waving him off. 

Now, Johnny was alone. He looked around the party taking in the sight of the people around him, and wondering if there was any chance in finding Ten in-between all these party-goers. 

Luckily for him, it didn't take too long at all. He had been on his third walk around, snapping pictures and burning through his second cigarette. Johnny had all but given up by this point, resigning himself to going inside to search instead, when he spotted a familiar figure sprawled out under a tree. 

A wave of shock washed over him. 

Ten was alone, lying completely relaxed in the grass, a hand raised above his head protecting his eyes from speckles of light that were falling through the tree branches. 

However, what had Johnny so surprised, wasn’t the way he was sat, but the joint Ten lowered to his mouth. 

“So you hate smoking, but weed… that's fine?” 

Not having seen him approach, Ten startled slightly letting his arm drop back behind him and smiling up at Johnny. 

He looked almost cat-like in the way he was lying, body twisting as he stretched to get a better look at him. He let out a loud giggle, that was definitely more to do with the drug in his system than what Johnny had said, and spoke up: “It helps me relax.” He stated, taking another hit before exhaling, the thick smoke swirling above his head. “Want a go?” He tipped the joint in his direction, eyes hooded. 

Johnny shrugged, it had been a while since he’d smoked weed, and if he was being honest, he kind of missed the way it made him feel. Plopping himself down on the grass and stubbing out his cigarette, he made himself comfortable before taking it from Ten. 

Inhaling deeply, Johnny allowed the drug to enter his system, smoke filling his lungs and body automatically relaxing. He flopped down onto his back falling comfortably next to Ten — letting out his own stream of smoke and a low laugh. “Good…” Ten sighed next to him, taking the joint between his own delicate fingers and taking another hit. The sunset colours danced across the clouds painting patterns and bathing the two boys in hues of pink and gold. 

They stayed like this for some time. Just the two of them, sharing the joint until there was hardly anything left. Johnny took one more hit, savouring the feeling before grinding the remainder into the ground. At some point, the two of them had gravitated towards each other, bodies automatically turning until they were facing one another. 

There was a moment of silence, in which time the same faraway look from the rooftop photoshoot appeared on Ten’s face. He frowned, rubbing a hand over his swollen eyes. Johnny only watched, giving him the thinking space he needed. 

His body felt almost weightless as if he was floating just above the ground. The air was warm, and the sound of the crowd had become a distant murmur. 

Eventually, Ten spoke up: “I got kicked out…” 

Now it was Johnny’s turn to frown, eyes blinking slowly — trying to make sense of what he’d just said. “From the dance class? You weren't that late, surely they can’t do that?” 

Ten shook his head, chuckling slightly. “No, not that” He smiled sadly “ages ago, you asked me why I came to the city…” 

Even in Johnny’s drug-fuelled state, he could understand what Ten was hinting at, “Oh… what happened?” He chanced, talking in almost whispers as if he was worried speaking to loud would frighten the other away. 

“I came out as gay, they no longer wanted anything to do with me.” He shrugged, shuffling his body closer to Johnny. “I mean it was to be expected, my parents are very conservative. I guess I just thought that If they knew that their own son was, was… like me… they would change their opinion. Safe to say they didn’t.” 

The frown between his eyebrows deepened, Johnny wanted nothing more than to reach out and smooth his forehead, reminding the other to relax. In the end, he settled for shuffling impossibly closer. Their knees brushing, faces inches apart. “What happened after that?” 

“I was homeless for a couple of days, but luckily an old friend found me and took me in. I stayed with them for a while, working odd jobs and saving up money. Then as soon as I could afford to, I brought a one-way ticket to New York and never looked back.” He let the sentence hang in the air, watching carefully for Johnny’s reaction. 

“Well, for what it’s worth,” Johnny finally spoke after a small pause, having taken in what Ten was saying, “the people who left you have no idea what they’re missing out on.” Ten smiled almost shyly at him, biting his lip — Johnny continued: “I mean to come out to your family is a really brave thing to do. None of my family know I’m into more than just girls or that I've had relationships with men before… I got out of there before they could find out.” 

“So you're bi?” 

“Bi, pan, yeah something along those lines — I don't really label myself. Why was it not obvious?”

“Well, I wasn't sure… Don't like to assume you know.” They both laughed, neither of them minding when their heads bumped together. 

“I’ll make sure to be more clear the next time I check you out then.” 

He could feel Ten’s breath ghosting over his lips, hand coming up to brush his fringe out of his eyes, “Thank you, Johnny…” He spoke so quietly, Johnny almost didn't catch it. This only added to the surprise as Ten’s lips pressed softly against his — closing the very small space between them. 

It took Johnny a second to react, clouded brain delaying his response time. However, as soon as he realised what was happening he surged forward kissing back happily. After all, this was something he had wanted to do for a while now. 

Ten was first to open his mouth, granting access and allowing Johnny to deepen the kiss. 

As quickly as it had begun, Ten pulled away slightly, wrinkling his nose and halting their movement: “You taste like an ashtray.” He complained, making Johnny laugh slightly. Even in his drugged hazed state, Ten still had a huge disliking for his smoking habit. 

Right now, however, Johnny had a secure counter-argument: “So do you…” 

Apparently, that was all Ten needed to hear as he quickly reconnected their lips, moving his mouth lazily against Johnny’s. 

Johnny rolled over slightly, bracing an arm on the other side of Ten’s body to support his weight and deepening the kiss once more. At some point, he slipped a leg between Ten’s making the position more comfortable for both of them. Underneath him, Ten let out an audible groan, biting down on Johnny’s lip. This caused Johnny to release his own sound of pleasure, pushing forward for more. 

The moment was ended, by the loud huff of laughter coming from Ten. He broke the kiss, looking up and shaking his head slightly: “Johnny, we’re high…” 

Letting out his own laughter, Johnny rolling over onto his back — laying his arm over his eyes, “Shit I guess we are.” He reached out a hand, linking it easily with Ten’s and gazing up at the now midnight blue of the sky.  _ When did that happen? _ He absentmindedly thought to himself, eyes zoning in and out of the glinting stars. 

He rolled onto his side again, gaze meeting with Ten’s. The other man's eyes were rather bloodshot. Blinking slowly, Johnny was sure he looked much the same. His eyes trailed down, falling upon the lips he had just been kissing, temptation filling his entire being. 

Just as he was about to lean forward and capture them once more, a voice sounded from behind him. “Hey, Johnny? There you are.” A rather sweaty but mostly sober Yuta called. Just behind him, a rather tipsy Dongyoung lounged his arms over Yuta’s shoulders, leaning heavily on him. Johnny snapped his head up, ignoring the way his vision spun at the sudden movement. His new position revealed Ten to his friends, lying beside him with well-kissed lips, swollen eyes and a big grin. “Oh hey, Ten didn't see you there. I’m glad you found each other, we came out looking for you several times but didn’t notice you here.” 

“Don’t worry about it,” Johnny assured, pushing himself into a sitting position and pressing his back against the steady trunk of the tree. Ten did the same, however, instead of the tree, he leant his head against Johnny’s shoulder, playing with his hands. 

“I smell weed...” Dongyoung exclaimed, swinging slightly from his position on Yuta’s neck, “Are you guys high?” 

Ten let out a giggle, covering his mouth and putting on a false innocence. Johnny, however, didn't even pretend, nodding his head confidently: “Just a little…” 

Yuta huffed, crossing his arms: “Are you fucking kidding me? You told us not to get too wasted and yet you were out here getting stoned!” The way he put it made the two on the floor laugh harder, “Did you at least save any?” He questioned hopefully. 

“Nope. Sorry, I don't have any more, but I can point you in the direction of someone who does!” Ten lifted his arm, swinging it in a random direction before laughing again. 

“Right, I’m gonna find Gem and get her to help me sober you lot up… God, I fucking hate being the responsible friend.” Yuta complained loudly, dropping Dongyoung down next to the other two and turning around. 

The night was still young, and once he had located Gem, Kiya and a large amount of water, the six of them settled down outside. With the party still in full swing, the lawn, that they had decided to set up camp on, was still fairly busy. None of them gave much thought about the bustle of people around them, being more content with the small group of friends that surrounded them. Kiya had a protective arm around Gem, their heads resting together as they listened to Yuta retelling his infamous interview story, Dongyoung was laughing his head off (definitely still more drunk then he let on), Johnny was still pressed firmly against the tree with Ten, comfortably nestled against his side. The air was warm and he finally felt himself fully relax — maybe Yuta had been right, this party was turning out to be pretty great. 

As he began to come down from his high, thanks to the food and copious amount of water he had consumed, Johnny’s sober brain started to kick into action — disrupting his perfect mood. One thought circled around his brain, a constant loop of mild anxiety: had he gone too far? Was letting Ten kiss him the right thing to do? Should he not have kissed back? Was Ten going to regret this? After all, the last time the two of them had almost kissed, Ten had bolted completely ignoring him for days after. Johnny didn't want that to happen again. He wanted Ten to know it wasn't just the drug in his system making him act that way, and he wanted to know that Ten felt the same way. 

Cuddling close to his side, the man in question was completely unaware of the thoughts circling Johnny’s brain. Letting out a long yawn he allowed his eyes to flutter shut — completely blissed out. 

Kiya eyed them from across the circle, raising her eyebrows slightly and motioning between her and her girlfriend and him and Ten. Johnny managed a half shrug, not wanting to disturb the half-asleep man on his shoulder and forcing himself to relax again. There was nothing he could do about his worries right now anyway. The past couldn't be changed, and he doubted he’d get any answers out of Ten right at this moment. In the end, he settled for pulling the smaller close to his side — sharing his body heat and trying to keep Ten warm. 

“Thanks…” Ten sleepily slurred, rubbing at his eyes, before letting his hand fall onto Johnny’s lap — linking their fingers together. Johnny wasn't sure what he was being thanked for, but he didn't question it, letting his thumb smooth the soft skin on Ten’s knuckles. Maybe things would be okay.

It was 3:00 am when a very drunk and sweaty Taeyong collapsed next to the group. They were loudly singing a song that was playing inside the main party, limbs flailing dramatically as they pointed to each member of the group, desperately trying to make them join in. It didn't work. Taeyong pouted, sitting up slightly and draping themself onto Ten’s side. The extra weight unbalancing Johnny and simultaneously waking Ten. 

He sat up, cracking his stiff neck and blinking at his drunk friend. “How long have I been asleep?” He asked croakily. 

“Aw baby boy, I’d say around an hour.” Kiya cooed laughing slightly at the pout that formed on Ten’s face, “How’s your arm, Johnny?” She asked, bringing Ten’s attention to the person he’d been using as a pillow. 

Johnny only chuckled, rolling his shoulder to regain some of the feeling it had lost, “I think I’ll survive.” 

Now that Ten had become aware of him, Johnny was slightly concerned that he’d be blocked out, turned away or ignored. Thankfully Ten did none of those things, instead, snuggling himself further into Johnny’s embrace and sighing contently: “Well, you make a great pillow, what can I say.” He yawned, screwing his eyes shut and stretching his arms above his head. Kiya shot Johnny a smile, seemingly pleased by Ten’s reaction as well.

It was at that moment, that Taeyong passed out. Flopping onto the floor like a dead weight. Gem sighed loudly and Ten let out a burst of laughter. “Whelp, that was bound to happen, we should probably get this one home.” 

Ten agreed with his roommate, chugging half a bottle of water and using Johnny’s shoulder to help himself up. 

Johnny’s side instantly felt cold, missing Ten’s warmth as soon as it had disappeared. 

“Are you guys heading home?” Dongyoung asked, watching as over half the group began to stand. 

“Yeah best get Taeyong home,” Gem explained, hoisting her friend up by the arm and supporting them between her and Kiya. “Thank you for chilling with us tonight guys, it's been good.” She gave them a small salute. 

“Hey Johnny, see you at work tomorrow, I hope you're not too out of it.” Kiya laughed from the other side of Taeyong. Johnny was quick to reassure her, promising to be there.

As he looked away from his friend, his gaze met Ten’s. The younger was staring at him, eyes still blinking slowly, but a warm smile spreading over his face. Not being able to help himself, a smile of his own appeared. Ten lifted a hand, waving to the group and then turned to follow the rest of his friends. 

“Sooo, Johnny baby?” Yuta drawled once the other group had left, “You and Tennie seemed a lot more touchy-feely this evening… Did something happen?” He sent Johnny an exaggerated wink, earning a loud laugh from Dongyoung, who also had a mischievous glint in his eye. 

For once, Johnny allowed himself to smirk back, his earlier worries seeming a lot smaller now. “Do you really want to know?” He wiggled his eyebrows, sending a wink back at his friends. This made Dongyoung laugh more, shaking his head and scrunching his eyes shut. 

“You dirty son of a bitch!” Yuta cackled. 

Johnny just laughed loudly shaking his head: “No I'm just kidding, nothing happened. We just kissed, it was nice but we broke it off before you arrived because, well, we were both high.” 

“So now what?” Dongyoung asked. 

“I don't know…” Johnny admitted. 

“Well, did you like it, you know, kissing Ten?”

“Yeah,” Johnny nodded, “yeah of course I did, I mean it’s only something I've been wanting to do for the best part of two months… But I don't know how he feels about it?” 

“Well, from what I saw,” Yuta chimed in, “he seemed pretty into you tonight.” He wiggled his eyebrows dramatically, nudging Johnny’s side with his elbow.

“Go suck a dick Yuta,” 

“Maybe I _ would _ have if I hadn't been busy babysitting you kids tonight!”

“Bitch, I’m older than you,” 

“Then act like it, fucking ask Ten out, or stop tiptoeing around your feelings for each other for fuck's sake!” 

Johnny knew his roommate was right, he needed to properly talk to Ten. 

“Yeah, I know. Thanks, man.” He ruffled Yuta’s hair, hauling himself to his feet and draping himself over both his friends' shoulders. “Right, let's get out of here, you both have work tomorrow as well.” 

Dongyoung was the first to move, attaching himself to Johnny’s arm, and yawning loudly, “Fuck it, I’m just going to call in sick.” Johnny knew he was lying. 

Together, they dragged Yuta up by his arms and the three of them made their way back to the safety of their apartment. 

***

The late June party quickly turned into early July. Johnny woke up with a slightly clouded head, body feeling the repercussions from last night — but memories of the past 24 hours still firmly intact. He counted that as a success. 

The apartment was quiet when he exited his bedroom — neither of his roommates having shifts until the evening. Unfortunately, Johnny wasn't so lucky, rushing to prepare himself for his lunchtime slot. 

Due to his late start, Johnny only had half an hour to get himself ready and get his ass out the door. He groaned to himself, stretching his sleep stiff body and grabbing a bite to eat. 

Once he had eaten and chugged a mug of hot coffee, Johnny had hopped into the shower, hoping to wash the stale scent of weed out of his hair. 

Finally, he selected some (probably) clean clothes, and rushed out of the apartment, stifling a yawn as he made his way onto the street. 

He couldn't complain really, work was work after all. Plus, Johnny was lucky enough to enjoy his job, and like the team he worked with. 

To add to this, he was hoping to talk to Kiya, get her thoughts on Ten’s behaviour last night — she's known him for longer than Johnny, after all.

He made it to work, carding a hand through his still-damp hair and greeting the other members of staff. A mixture of sympathetic looks and raised eyebrows were sent his way, obviously, he wasn't looking too hot today. “Hey Kiya,” He croaked, coughing to clear his throat as he made his way around the counter, “you alright?” He rubbed a hand over his face, slapping his cheeks a couple of times to try and wake himself up.

“Hey, Johnny you're looking rough.” She laughed in return, patting him on his back, “What time did you get home in the end?” 

“About half 4ish… We walked home last night — who would have known a 20-minute train journey could turn into a long-ass walk...” 

“Oh babe, everyone knows that. You guys should have crashed at ours, it only took us 15 minutes.”

“Yeah well, I’ll take you up on that offer next time. How are the others?” 

“They're alright, Gem’s at work, Taeyong was a bit out of it when I last checked on them — but recovering, and Ten, he’s fine, couldn't stop talking about you last night. High Johnny obviously left a good impression on him.” She winked, noticing the slight blush that began to creep up Johnny’s uncharacteristically pale face. “You really like him don't you?” 

“Is it that obvious?” 

“Hmm, only to those who are looking for it…” 

Johnny sighed, “Yeah I like him, I  _ really _ like him but… I don't know if he feels the same?” He voiced his worries, looking to Kiya for some advice. 

She pursed her lips slightly, looking as if she wanted to say something but was unsure of how to word it: “I don't want to say anything that Ten might want to tell you himself…” She started, “But, as someone who’s known him for years, it's safe to say, I've never seen him act like this around anyone before. Just talk to him will you.” 

Nodding Johnny filed away that information, “You sound like Yuta now… I know you’re both right, I’ve got to stop skirting around the situation—” 

“Yeah, but be gentle with him Johnny, he doesn't normally let people in this quickly — if he feels rushed he’s more likely to block you out again.” Johnny nodded once more, keeping his head down and biting at one of his nails. “He told me, by the way, that you know why he moved here — that's a big step for him, John.”

“We kissed last night,” Johnny admitted, head still turned down but eyes glancing up to see Kiya’s reaction. “did he tell you that?” 

She only shook her head, smiling warmly at him and squeezing his shoulder, “Let's get to work.” They split up after that, Johnny making his way over to the storeroom, “But I mean it, Johnny,” Kiya called, just before he left the main room, “talk to him.” 

“I will, don't worry.” 

  
  



	7. The 4th Of July

A few days passed by and Johnny still hadn't spoken to Ten. 

To be fair, the two of them had chatted over text a bit, but neither one had brought up anything about the party, other than comparing the hangovers they had (it's safe to say Johnny had won that one…). 

The problem was, Johnny was a coward. 

He was happy to admit he liked Ten, and sure, he really wanted Ten to like him back… but he also kind of liked where they were right now.

As it was, they were still in the early stages of their friendship (after the few setbacks), and Johnny didn't want to rush things. So instead, here he was — tiptoeing carefully around the subject, much to  _ all _ of his friends' annoyance. 

He was chilling at the table, legs thrown up in front of him, phone loosely gripped in his hand. It was 9:30 in the morning and Johnny and Ten had been chatting on and off for the last 15 minutes. 

From the brightness outside, Johnny could already tell today was going to be another scorching day. 

He was just finishing off his piece of toast, happily shooting off a reply to Ten when his roommate's door flew open. 

“Wakey wakey bitches!” Yuta called out, grin on his face as he stormed into the main living area. His eyes quickly landed on Johnny, and noticing the confused look on his face he launched into action: “Do you know what day it is?” 

Johnny shook his head, racking his brain but coming up blank, he hadn't been paying much attention to the date, knowing it was early July but nothing else. Yuta looked at him with complete disbelief before answering his own question: “The 4th of July…” 

Johnny laughed, not having realised that day had rolled around so quickly: “I didn't take you as the patriotic type Yuta?” 

“Oh come on, my name is literally Yuta, get it Utah… they sound similar.” Johnny cracked up, throwing his head back to laugh at his friend's ridiculousness. “No but seriously, all jokes aside, I'm not that patriotic but... I chose America as my home, for the time being, and the 4th of July is like a country-wide party, there’s no way I’m not going to celebrate.” 

“Okay, okay fair enough, what's your plan then?” 

“Isn't it obvious? We’re going to throw a party!”

Johnny sighed, “But we literally went to one less than a week ago.” He complained, letting his head lull back against the chair and scrunching his eyes. 

“Yeah, well I knew you’d complain ya weirdo, so I've got a plan:” Yuta stated, rolling his eyes dramatically, “I’ll be honest, at the last party, I had the most fun when it was just the seven of us at the end, you know it was chill, it was enjoyable… so I thought, why don't we just get together with our real friends and celebrate on the roof?”

Now Johnny had to admit, that didn't sound so bad. Just a low key catch up with the people he actually liked. Plus an opportunity to talk to Ten… He agreed quickly, electing a cheer out of Yuta and an angry call from Dongyoung’s room for waking him up so early on his day off. 

Their other friend emerged soon after that, hair sticking up and body clad in soft looking pyjamas “What are you guys yelling about?” He asked mid-yawn, quickly pouring himself a cup of coffee and sitting on the chair next to Johnny.

“We’re gonna throw a party tonight!” Yuta exclaimed happily, slinging an arm around both his friend's shoulders.

“Wow, how’d you agree to that?” He asked Johnny, turning his tired eyes on his other roommate. 

Johnny just shrugged, busying himself with his phone. “Probably because I said we’re just going to invite our friends, so… that means Ten will be around...” Yuta joked, laughing loudly when he saw Johnny’s face heat up. 

He scratched the back of his neck, trying to ignore the eyes that were currently fixed on him. Luckily Dongyoung wasn't that interested. “You should probably try and contact the group then, I mean, the 4th of July is literally today, they might already have plans.” 

“I'm on it,” Johnny offered, quickly pulling up his conversation with Ten and sending him and his friends an invite. He also sent a text to Kiya, just in case she hadn't slept over that night. 

It didn't take long before they both replied: Ten, being very grateful that he got to them so quickly, thanking Johnny for getting him out of a bigger party. Kiya, just casually agreed, telling him that the four of them would definitely be there.

Johnny had to admit, he was actually feeling excited about this. It would be the first 4th of July he was properly celebrating for a while, and because of the company he would be sharing it with, he had an overall good feeling about the whole evening. 

“They’ve all agreed.” Johnny let his friends know, holding up Kiya’s message for the others to see. 

“Fuck yes!” Yuta cried, fist pumping the air. “Right, we have so much stuff to get sorted by this evening, Dongyoung get dressed, the three of us are going shopping.” He stated, rushing into his own bedroom to grab the things he needed. 

Although Dongyoung let out a loud groan at his friend's comment, his face was also reflecting the excitement of the situation, he stole the remainder of Johnny’s toast (much to his annoyance), and made his way back into his bedroom. 

The rest of that morning was spent shopping. 

They started off on decorations, Johnny and Dongyoung having to literally drag Yuta away from the star-spangled top hats and extravagant outfits — reminding him that they were on a budget here. In the end, they settled on a string of flags and some appropriately festive fairy lights. 

Next was food. This was easy: a lot of beer and a lot of snacks. They also decided to splash out a little, purchasing a disposable barbecue and a selection of food to grill.

Yuta was practically thrumming with excitement by this point, which probably led to the next, and possibly worst decision he had made so far — fireworks. 

That's right, even with his friend's disagreements and words of warning, Yuta brushed them off, picking up a medium-sized barrel and adding it to the cart. 

The conversation had quickly led on from fireworks to sparklers, him and Johnny reminiscing on fun childhood memories. “I've never used a sparkler before…” Dongyoung explained, feeling slightly sad that he had missed out on a key childhood experience. Yuta silently placed a couple of packs in with the rest of their goods. 

One small fortune later: the three friends were making their way back into the apartment. They packed the food and drinks into the fridge, not wanting them to go warm in the heat of the afternoon, then headed upwards — carrying as many things as they could. 

Up went chairs, pillows, blankets and a rug. A portable speaker, the decorations and of course, the all-important fireworks.

They had been stopped on the top floor by their confused and slightly disgruntled landlord. Stan had taken a bit of convincing but eventually, he had sighed, letting out a deep laugh and telling them to be safe up there. “Oh, and boys,” he started, just before they all rushed off, “I’m going out tonight so don't cause any noise complaints alright?” Stan gave them all a pointed stare, only laughing harder when they all agreed quickly. 

***

The evening rolled around, and the group had only just been able to finish setting up when the others arrived. Johnny had been in the apartment, bagging up the food when the doorbell rang, he dropped the bags on the landing, calling to one of his roommates to pick them up, while he raced down the stairs. 

Pulling the door open he was greeted loudly and pulled into a group hug. “Hey guys,” He grinned, scanning the four faces. His eyes landed on Ten. The shorter male was smiling up at him, one hand carried a bag of refreshments while the other carded self-consciously through his freshly bleached, platinum blonde hair. “Wow!” Johnny exclaimed, eye’s scanning over the light stands, “You’ve changed your hair.” He stated dumbly, flushing slightly when the group let out a laugh. 

“Yeah, what do you think?” 

“I think you look great,” He blurted out, feeling his face heat up more, before trying to backtrack a little “I mean, it really suits you, we should do a photo shoot with it…” He quickly elaborated, watching Ten’s eyes turn to crescents as he smiled impossibly brighter. 

“Thanks, I just fancied a change and summer feels like the perfect time to go blonde.” Looking at Ten, Johnny had flashbacks to the first time they saw each other, Ten’s silver hair really leaving a lasting impression on him. 

“Well, come on in, the other two are just upstairs, we’re pretty much finished setting everything up,” he invited them in, realising that they were all still standing in the hallway of the building. 

The group followed him, chatting excitedly as they walked up to the roof. 

“Wow, look what you’ve done with the place,” Ten stated as they walked through the door, taking in the decorations and extra seating area. 

To say Johnny was proud of the transformation would be an understatement, the three of them had worked hard, not only with setting up the things they brought but also with clearing the place up a bit. The decorations were hung around the perimeter of the building, lights strung up around the table and the stairs, pillows placed artfully on the rug that they had dragged from their apartment. 

The refreshments were set up under the table, keeping out of the sun — while the barbecue was being set up on top. 

“Hey, guys what do you think of the place?” Dongyoung asked, from where he was placing the snacks. 

“It looks great.” Taeyong called back, going to greet him in a hug hello, “Pass us a beer would you?” Dongyoung did one better than that, passing them a pack and asking for them to be handed out to the others.

Just then Yuta looked up, noticing the arrival of their friends “Ah you're here,” He announced, standing up from where he had been squatting next to the, apparently ‘house safe’, barrel of explosives…

“Is that what I think it is?” Gem questioned, leaving the side of the group to further investigate. 

“Yup,” Yuta stated, proudly, “We have sparklers as well.” 

“Have you ever used fireworks before?” 

“Not like this, but how hard can it be right?” 

Kiya let out a half sigh half laugh, walking over to join her girlfriend, “Well luckily for you, my family have always been big on fireworks, so I’ll be able to help you out.” 

***

From then on the evening went into full swing, the seven of them relaxing out on the roof with good food, cheap beer and great company. 

As the sun set, a tipsy atmosphere fell over the group, drinks flowing easily and in large quantities. So far things were all going well, they had only had one minor incident, where the barbecue had almost set on fire, but that had (luckily) been resolved quickly. 

Johnny had taken over as chef then, happily accepting compliments on his self proclaimed ‘fucking great’ cooking skills. 

However, as he was playing as one of the hosts, he was yet to have an opportunity to chat with Ten, he pushed the thought out of his head for now, after all, the evening had just begun — there’d be plenty of time for that later. 

The sky turned from golden to blue — in the distance the first fireworks could be seen going off, blasts of colour exploding in the sky. From the roof they were able to see the full expanse of the area, watching the different displays go off all around them. 

Now that all the cooking had been complete, Johnny used this chance to finally make his way over to Ten. He grabbed his half-full beer and his camera from the table, lazily raising it to his face and capturing a photo of the other man. 

Ten was stretched out on the rug, propped up slightly by the wall behind him and watching the fireworks paint the sky in different colours. 

The flash went off and Ten’s attention was drawn in Johnny’s direction. “Are you always waiting to take creep shots of me?” He questioned in a light tone of voice. 

“Maybe,” Johnny joked, sitting himself down beside Ten and taking a swig of his beer. He placed both his drink and his camera down on the floor, looking out over the rest of the party. 

The group had become split into three: on one side Dongyoung and Taeyong were laughing loudly — at the very end of the rooftop, Yuta, Gem and Kiya were crouched over the fireworks, arguing slightly about how best to set up the display. And then there was Ten and Johnny, completely tucked away from the others — not dissimilar to the last party. 

“So what are you up to?” Johnny asked, turning his attention back to Ten and leaning back against the wall. 

“Oh you know not much, just people watching.” He indicated with a hand in the direction of the others, laughing slightly at the firework crew. “What about you?” 

“Well,” Johnny started, taking another sip of his drink before continuing, “I’m all finished being a professional chef,” Ten let out a snort, “so I thought I’d come and see you.” He finished. 

The other looked at him with a glint in his eye, raising an eyebrow before replying: “Look, Yuta already asked me but I'm sorry, I don't have any weed today.” He joked, shrugging his shoulders before poking Johnny in the side. 

“Goddamn,” Johnny said, voice thick with sarcasm, “I guess your company will have to do instead then…” His tone changed to genuine on that last part, sentence trailing off once Ten’s eyes landed back on him — gaze almost piercing.

Johnny wasn't sure if it was the soft light on the roof, the alcohol in his system or the buzz of the evening — but right at that moment in time, he couldn't help but think that Ten was completely beautiful and ethereal, almost glowing in the soft light. 

“What do you suggest we do then?” Ten asked, tone low and eyelashes fluttering slightly. 

Johnny was at a momentary loss of words, swallowing thickly and placing his drink back down. “How drunk are you?” He instead questioned back. 

“Just comfortably tipsy, you?” 

“Yeah, same here…” 

The space between them suddenly felt much smaller, Ten’s eyes were still boring into Johnny’s own — making it difficult for him to think straight. 

The party around them was quickly becoming forgotten, the music distant and voices fading away into the background. 

In front of him, Ten wet his lips. 

Later on, If asked who moved first, Johnny wouldn't be able to say whether it was him, Ten, or if they both went in at the same time. The only important thing was that once again, they were kissing. 

It was different this time. With no drug (other than alcohol) interfering with their senses, the movement of their lips became a lot more urgent. Ten was kissing him hard, lips bruising against his as he moved in for more — tongue swiping over Johnny’s bottom lip, asking for access. Johnny complied, parting his lips slightly and inviting Ten to take anything he wanted. To which, the other did, awkwardly clambering his way onto Johnny’s lap and threading his fingers through his hair. 

With his senses completely overwhelmed by Ten, Johnny's hands fumbled for what to do, In the end, he settled on circling them around the smaller’s hips — pulling their bodies flush against each other. 

Their mouths were still moving feverishly, Ten occasionally nipping at Johnny’s lips — forcing quiet gasps and silent moans to escape him. Ten Just hummed into the kiss at this, obviously pleased with the reaction he was able to create. They continued like this for a while — completely losing themselves in the moment, and, almost, forgetting where they were. 

It was a bright flash of light that interrupted them in the end. The two men pulled apart, quickly turning to the side and coming face to face with a grinning Taeyong. “Hey boys,” they laughed, wiggling their eyebrows suggestively at the pair, and waving Johnny’s camera that was held in one hand.

Ten scrambled off Johnny’s lap, face heating up as he reached to pull the camera away from his friend (just in case they were thinking of taking more). He sent a threatening glare in Taeyong’s direction, passing the camera back to Johnny without sparing him a glance. 

Dongyoung was laughing to the side, head thrown back and eyes screwed shut — obviously having been in on the idea. Johnny flipped them both off, ignoring the way his action only made the pair laugh more. 

Before anyone could Address the situation, Yuta called from his position on the roof: “Guys we’re just about ready, Johnny can we borrow your lighter again?” 

The man in question sighed, dragging himself to his feet before offering a hand to Ten. 

Ten took it, hoisting himself up before detaching himself and walking over to the other group. 

Surprisingly, without much trouble, the fireworks were lit, and red, white and blue explosions filled the sky. The group watched the display, cheering for their friends' success and pleased that they hadn’t caused any bodily harm.

For the rest of the night, Johnny found him and Ten were constantly split up — either they were both wanted by different people, or when they could talk, Ten would quickly busy himself with something else. 

Johnny felt lost — unsure of how he could have misread the situation. Ten had seemed just as into that kiss as he was (if the way he’d stuck his tongue down his throat and sat on his lap had anything to say about it). 

A niggling worry settled in his chest. 

The night ended with the group lighting the sparklers. Johnny opted out, instead deciding to take some photographs of the others. Sometime during this, Dongyoung insisted that he should use one too, noticing the dip in his mood and feeling somewhat responsible for it. 

In the end, the four guests decided to crash in the apartment, Johnny gave up his bed for Gem and Kiya, insisting on sleeping on the couch, while Dongyoung decided to room with Yuta for the night — telling Ten and Taeyong to take his. 

Even once they had all said goodnight, and the lights were switched off, Johnny found himself lying wide awake — thoughts racing from the events of the evening. He screwed his eyes shut, pulling the pillow over his head and trying to clear his mind.

He was in for a long night. 

***

At some point, Johnny must have managed to fall asleep because the next thing he knew, light was shining into his eyes, and the sound of distant voices were becoming steadily clearer. 

He snapped awake, eye’s flying open and body giving a jolt — almost knocking himself off the small sofa. 

“Oh, morning Johnny,” Kiya said from where she was pulling on her shoes, “sorry if we woke you.” 

Johnny stretched his limbs, letting out a loud yawn before flopping back down into the comfort of the pillows, “It's okay” He mumbled out, eyes threatening to drift shut once again. 

“We’re just leaving, thanks for having us, last night was great fun — tell the other two we said bye yeah?” Johnny nodded, rubbing a hand over his eyes and moving to roll over and go back to sleep. 

The door closed with a click and Johnny properly woke up. His eyes snapped open once more. This time he really did role himself off his makeshift bed. One thought racing through his head — if he didn't catch Ten now the opportunity to talk would be missed, _ again.  _

He ran out the door, not waiting for it to close before he was rushing down the stairs. He was dressed in his pyjamas (an old t-shirt and a pair of boxers), hair sticking up and feet completely bare against the cold tiled floor, but he didn't care. “Wait a minute Ten!” He called out, voice hoarse with sleep. He couldn't see the people who had just left so he kept going, spiralling down the stairs as quickly as his tired legs would take him. 

The person he was looking for was just stepping onto the ground floor when he spotted him, stumbling down the last couple of steps and reaching out a hand to stop him. 

Ten halted his movement, seeming slightly shocked to see Johnny wide awake and holding onto his shoulder. 

“Johnny, is everything okay?” He questioned, glancing at his friends before turning his questioning stare back on the man in front of him. 

“Ten, I'm sorry, I just… is it okay if we talk for a minute?” Ten looked him in the eye, and nodded.

“We’ll see you out there.” Taeyong quickly decided, leading the other two towards the door. Johnny sent them a thankful smile. 

The door clicked and they were alone. Johnny sat on the bottom step of the stairs, inviting Ten to join him — thankfully he did. 

“Can we talk about this…” Johnny started, indicating between them, “Us” he clarified.

Ten sighed, “Is there much to talk about?” 

“I think there is, I mean the last two times we’ve met up, we’ve ended up kissing, and I don't know — call me a romantic if you want, but that's gotta mean something right?”

There was a pause. “You’re right, it does…” Ten hesitated, unable to meet Johnny’s eyes. Johnny felt relief wash over him, however, the whole situation was quickly dampened “But I don't think I can be in a relationship right now.” 

Johnny couldn't lie, an ugly feeling of disappointment welled up inside him. But he wasn't mad — maybe he had completely misread the situation. He couldn't expect Ten to want something more just because they’d kissed twice. In fact, now that he thought about it, the whole idea did seem pretty stupid. 

And who was Johnny to judge? Back in his college days, he was the one to be turning down men, and women alike after a hookup, because that's all it had ever been for him. A hookup, a one night stand, a way to blow off steam. And all he and Ten had done was kiss... friends did shit like that all the time, right?

He took a deep breath, but before he could find the right words, Ten continued: “I do like you Johnny,” He rushed out, face flushing, “to be honest, if this was happening at any other time it would probably be a different story… It’s just, things are about to get really busy for me, and I need all my attention on dancing, so…” He shrugged lamely. 

Johnny recalled a conversation from last night with the dancers, they were telling the group all about the show they were putting on at the end of August. It was a big deal — a way to get noticed by dance companies, the best way to take the next steps in their careers. As Ten was the choreographer, Johnny knew how important it was to him. 

“It’s okay Ten, you don't have to explain—”

He was cut off by a sound of frustration leaving Ten’s mouth. “No, you don't get it!” He sighed, a small smile slipping easily onto his lips. He leaned up, placing a quick kiss against Johnny’s mouth. It was chaste, and nothing like the heat-filled make out session from the night before. “It’s just right now I need time, and I can’t expect you to wait for me.”

“What if I want to wait?” Johnny touched a hand to his lips, unconsciously tracing the area Ten’s had just been.

A blush was steadily growing on Ten’s face, his eyes once again darting downwards: “Don’t say such things…”

“But it’s the truth.”

Ten seemed genuinely taken aback by this, eyes glancing up to meet Johnny’s, “Well, I…” Over the last few months that they’d known each other, Johnny had never seen Ten at a loss for words, it was a strange but endearing sight, his brain ticking over different responses — taking in the new information. Eventually, he continued: “How about we talk about this nearer the performance? That way you have plenty of opportunity to change your mind, I mean after all this is New York City — you might find someone better by August.” Ten’s Jokey tone of voice did nothing to cover his underlying insecurities.

“There’s no one quite like you though,” Johnny replied quietly, hoping to get his point across. He’d gotten this far without rushing Ten, he was happy to wait longer. 

A blinding smile appeared on Ten’s face, ears tinging pink from the sincerity of Johnny’s words. “Damn that was so cheesy,” He laughed, trying to cover up how happy the comment had made him. He placed his hand on Johnny’s knee, giving it a gentle squeeze before standing up: “I should probably get going.” He sighed, “The others will be wondering what’s going on.” With that final sentence, Ten made his way out the front door of the apartment building, waving to Johnny as he left. 

Even with the lack of decisions made, Johnny felt very positive about their conversation. A grin of his own spreading across his face, and a giddy feeling settling in his stomach. He could wait — waiting for a Ten was easy.

  
  



	8. Small Steps

Things began to move smoothly for them after that. The month of July progressed, and so did their relationship — the two of them beginning to take small steps, becoming more comfortable with each other. Sure, they still weren't ‘dating’, per se, but actively spending time together and getting to know one another more was definitely a step in the right direction. 

Their friends had teased them, Yuta nudging Johnny with his elbow and giving him knowing looks when he had returned to the apartment, apparently both his roommates had gotten up when they heard the front door slam.

His face had quickly turned to that of disappointment when Johnny had explained what had happened. “And tell me again why you’re looking so smug about this?” He had asked, sounding slightly exasperated. 

“His dancing is really important to him, surely you of all people understand that?” Johnny replied, crossing his arms. Yuta had literally spent the last four and a bit months dancing in the same class as Ten, and even though he and Dongyoung wouldn't be taking part in the end of summer show, they surely couldn't miss the effort all the performing dancers were putting in. “Anyway, as I said, I don't mind waiting. It’s a refreshing change of pace from my past relationships… If you can really call them that.” 

“I think it's good,” Dongyoung piped up from where he was sitting crossed legged on a chair, “This way you can explore your relationship, without getting too deep too quickly — it's healthy” 

“Thank you,” Johnny pointed to his other roommate, “I knew I could trust you to get it.” Dongyoung shot him a thumbs up, Yuta just sighed dramatically. 

Over in Ten’s apartment, he had received a similar reaction: there were cries of “Since when did  _ you _ take things slow?” and “I give it a couple of weeks before you two are all over each other.” 

Ten had rolled his eyes, face heating up slightly. It was safe to say he had a bit of a reputation in the apartment, being the least likely to stay in touch with the people he was interested in — scared to let them in, scared to allow anyone to get close. 

But Johnny was different: he was attractive, funny, passionate about what he loves and understanding. Ten had been drawn to him from the start, and for more than just his looks — falling for his personality as well. For once he wanted to get to know the other man, let himself trust in someone that wasn't just his closest friends. That had to mean something?

***

Summer in New York City was hot, the long days stretching out with scorching weather and blue sky.

It was a couple of weeks after the 4th of July celebrations, that the group were all able to meet up again, they wanted to make an effort to enjoy the weather, lounging out in the green spaces of the city. However, due to increasing schedules (in particular for the dancers), this had become more difficult.

“There they are,” Kiya expressed, walking into the park — hand in hand with Gem while Ten and Taeyong followed closely behind. 

The group had decided to meet in the late afternoon, rays of evening sun already casting golden hues over the park goers. 

Ten made his way over to Johnny, plopping himself down and cheekily removing the (currently unlit) cigarette from his mouth. 

They shared a greeting kiss, Johnny not giving a crap when his cigarette was crushed into the ground. “Hey, you” Ten murmured, breaking the kiss to look at Johnny with a warmth that reflected the sun. 

“Hey” Johnny had all but whispered in return, slinging an arm around Ten’s shoulders — face splitting into a goofy smile. To their side, Dongyoung cooed while Gem and Taeyong whistled dramatically. “Is this something we’re gonna do now?” He asked, slightly confused, but not at all put-off, by Ten’s actions. 

Ten had shrugged in return, a shy smile forming: “I don't know sorry, it just felt like the right thing to do.” 

“You don't have to apologise. You know it would never bother me.” 

The seven of them had fallen into a comfortable conversation then, each talking about what they had been up to since the last time they met up “I collected my film yesterday, the one from the party,” Johnny spoke up at one point, sending a knowing look at Ten, “Yeah, safe to say I hadn't thought much about what was on it until the shop owner brought up the picture of us making out…” He shot a glare at Taeyong, who had burst into laughter as soon as the topic had been brought up, “She wanted me to know that although she was very happy for us and gave us her support, intimate photos like that should probably be kept private. So thanks for that Taeyong.” He finished, eyes not leaving his friend who at this point was shaking with uncontrollable laughter.

“You’re absolutely welcome!”

“What? No!” Ten sounded slightly horrified at the story, “I’m never going to be able to show my face in there again.” He expressed, covering his eyes with embarrassment, “Although…” He added, peaking through the gaps in his fingers, “Is there any possibility I can see that picture?” 

“I’ll send it to you later…” 

“Okay enough of that.” Yuta quipped, changing the conversation onto dance. 

As the month was progressing, the dancers' schedules were to become even busier than they were now — not only were they getting ready for the performance at the end of August, but they were also continuing their part-time jobs as well. 

“No rest for the wicked.” Gem had sighed, lying back on the grass and enjoying the few hours of downtime they had. 

The three dancers, plus Kiya, had come straight from a painful six-hour rehearsal, still clad in their dance gear. It was nice for them to be able to take the opportunity to really relax — watch the stress and pressure of the day melt with the warmth of the sun. “It’s hard, but it’s worth it,” Taeyong explained to the group, they were sat with their back against the tree, legs cradled against their chest. “I mean, we knew what we were getting into when we agreed to do solos, or take main parts. Plus, it will help us get noticed. And we want to be noticed for the right reasons…” The group shuddered slightly, obviously remembering a less successful performance. 

“I’m excited!” Ten piped up, he had been picking flowers from the grass and turning them into a chain — stopping his actions to address the group properly. “We’re all putting in a lot of effort and making huge improvements every day. We’re showing that not only can we dance well, but we can lead a group, choreograph and teach.” He looked at the others now, “I can’t wait to show you guys how things have changed, you're all coming to the show right?”

Cries of “Of course we are”, “I wouldn't miss it” and “well duh” were heard from the other friends, Johnny watched Ten’s face light up at their reactions, excitement growing. 

Johnny was feeling much the same. There was one thing seeing Ten’s dance in its early stages, but a whole other seeing the finished piece with the music, the lighting, the costume. If he was mesmerised before, the real performance was going to be on a whole other level.

It was moments like this, shared in the sun that Johnny loved the most. A time to relax and reflect with his new found family.

They had shared some beers between them and enjoyed the last few hours of sunlight before packing it in for the day. As it was, they all had busy schedules starting the next morning and the dancers, in particular, couldn't afford to turn up without enough sleep. 

***

“It’s my step brothers birthday next month.” 

Johnny and Ten were chilling in the living room of Johnny’s apartment. They had hung out all day, relishing in having the same day off by not doing much but spending time with each other. 

“What day?” Ten questioned.

“The 2nd.” 

Ten nodded. Johnny had told him a bit about his family, but never going deep into detail, “Are you two close?” 

At this question, Johnny sighed: “I don't know… Well, we were once, before I went to college and became an asshole.” He laughed bitterly, “But the last time we spoke face to face, was the day I left for the city and he was mad, really mad.” Ten stayed quiet, not wanting to disrupt his train of thought. “I guess I disappointed him.” His eyes finally met Ten’s — a look of guilt flitting through them. 

“Have you talked to him since you left?” 

“Yeah, a couple of texts here and there, you know the usual — just to let the family know how things are going.” 

“Well, that’s something at least.” Ten brushed a stray hair out of Johnny’s face. It had become longer over the last few months that they had known each other, dark brown stands easily falling into his eyes now. 

There was a pause. Ten had a question on the tip of his tongue, something he had been wanting to ask for a while now, but always unsure of how to bring it up. He took a deep breath then launched in: “Do you mind telling me what happened in college? It’s just you've referenced your past self a lot and, I don't know, I guess I just want to hear your story…” He rambled out, anxious that he was overstepping the boundaries. 

Johnny took a deep breath as well, “Honestly, I'm probably making a bigger deal out of it than I need to, but it’s my way of reminding myself not to get back into those habits.” There was a pause, “In my first year, I got into the wrong crowd.” He looked up at Ten, “There was a group of guys in my dorm, they were nice people, mostly, but not a great influence. For them, the college experience was all about going out and getting wasted — and so, that's what it became for me. My life consisted of drinking, hookups and parties — I took a lot of shit just because the others were, and somewhere along the line convinced myself that I was having fun, feeling fulfilled.” 

Ten was looking at him with nothing but understanding, so Johnny continued: “It didn't help that I hated my course — I never wanted to be a lawyer, but my family expected me to do something worthwhile.” He paused, running through the story in his head, “That's when I completely cut them off: ignoring their calls, isolating myself. I upset a lot of people…” 

His eyes were once again downcast, Ten smoothed a hand down his arm, trying to bring him back to reality. “It took until the next year when I dropped out of college, to realise how stupid I’d been. And staying in the same city meant knowing where everything and everyone was — with the free time of being a college dropout, there were way too many temptations. So, I left.” 

Ten smiled reassuringly, pleased that Johnny had shared so much with him, “Thanks for trusting me. But I think you need to give yourself a break, like come on John, I don't know many people who didn't go slightly off the wall in college, you're definitely not the only one.”

Johnny laughed, feeling a weight lift off his shoulders — pleased to have finally shared this story with Ten.

“Look, younger me wasn't all that great either, I moved here at age 18, I was young and naive and I made a lot of mistakes, but that's what our youth's for right? Like, fuck it! We’re still young, I'm only 21 and you're only 22 — we’ve got many more mistakes to make.” He sent a wink in Johnny's direction only making him laugh more. 

After the laughter had died down a bit, Ten spoke up once more. This time in a more serious tone. “Why don't we all chip in together to get something for your brother? All seven of us, that way your family would know that the people you hang out with now are better than the last group… We’ll just forget the weed incident happened, yeah?” 

Johnny chuckled, “Yeah I’d like that.” He smiled brightly, feeling himself relax. “Thank you.” He held tightly onto Ten’s hand, giving it a squeeze before letting go — he should have talked to Ten about this a lot sooner. 

***

A few days before Mark’s birthday, Johnny gathered his friends into the small space of the living room and set up his Polaroid camera on a cheap tripod he had picked up. He positioned the group, making sure everyone was in shot before putting it in self-timer mode. 

Triggering the shutter, Johnny quickly made his way into the centre of the group, making sure no one was being blocked by his height before turning to the camera and flashing a smile. 

Just before the timer ran out, the group all moved. Ten linked his arm with Johnny’s blowing a kiss at the camera, Yuta slung an arm around his neck, pulling him and Dongyoung in towards him, Taeyong stuck two fingers up behind Johnny’s head and Kiya and Gem pulled goofy faces to the side. 

The camera whirred and the image was spat out. The group gathered around, waiting a couple of minutes for the picture to begin developing. 

When the photograph was finally revealed, they all let out hoots of loud laughter. It was everything Johnny could have asked for. The seven of them with big smiles, messing around in front of the camera and creating a scene that was so uniquely them. He made a note to get the polaroid scanned before sending it off — almost sad that he’d be giving the original away. 

Later that day, while Johnny was packing the gift the group had chosen for Mark (an NYC cap, some sour candies and a handmade bracelet from Dongyoung), Johnny slipped in the group polaroid and another one of the view from the rooftop. He also wrote a note, wishing him well on his birthday, telling him to have a good summer break and introducing each friend in the picture. He hoped his words would convey enough meaning to show his kid brother that he still very much cared and wanted to mend the things he had broken. 

He posted it off quickly, making sure it was sent with plenty of time to spare. 

A hopeful feeling settled in Johnny’s chest. Sure, there was still a long way to go when it came to mending the relationships with his brother (and rest of his family for that matter), but this was most definitely a start — a way to break the ice between them. It felt good to be taking this first step, something that only being away from them for a long time had shown him. 

Or maybe Johnny was just growing up. Either way, it didn't matter. 

To make it better, his friends had been so happy to be included in this. Excitedly talking about what they could get Mark, and wishing they had more cash to spare. This kind of friendship was something that Johnny hadn't experienced in a long time — maybe even ever. It felt good to finally have a group of people to call home.

Home: something that was made even more obvious by the picture. He hoped his family could see just how happy he was. Just how happy this city made him.

The 2nd of August rolled around, and Johnny was woken up in the morning by a text. 

_ Mark:  _

_ Hey John, thanks for my gift, I wasn't expecting to get anything so thanks. _

_ Your friends look cool btw oh and your mum says you should get a haircut… _

Johnny let out a chuckle, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes and quickly replying: 

_ You're welcome, and don't worry I would never forget your birthday! Tell mum I like my hair longer haha and thanks I’ll let them know you said that. _

He pressed send and flopped back down onto his bed. It felt good to be chatting properly with his brother again. 

_ John: _

_ Happy birthday from us all!  _

__

__

_ Mark: _

_ Thanks, man. _

  
  



	9. Show Time

August had come around, and before they knew it, August was on its way out. The summer months in NYC were unsurprisingly busy, the subways were always crowded, no thanks to the horde of tourists that flocked the street at this time of year, and Johnny found himself being needed down at the record store more than usual. 

Not that he minded, working at the shop kept him busy and out of the heat. It was also not far from his apartment, so he didn't even have to battle his way too much through the crowds to get there. Plus, while everyone was busy with their own things, it meant he wasn't getting bored by himself. 

It was true since the month had begun, everyone's schedule had picked up. Yuta had been non stop auditioning for different ameteur plays and musicals, Dongyoung had managed to land himself a role as an extra (something he would excitedly remind them about), Kiya had been promoted to manager at the store — not like she hadn't been practically working as one for years, and of course the dancers were all busy getting ready for the performance. 

It had come as some surprise when Johnny had checked his calendar, not realising the date of the performance had come around so quickly. 

He was excited, this show was highly anticipated by everyone and the more time he spent with the dancers, the more he came to understand how important it was to them — especially Ten. 

The two of them had continued meeting up, as regularly as they could with their busy schedules. Johnny even going to meet Ten after dance had finished for the evening — just so they could chat for a while over a coffee or something. 

It was safe to say, this performance was very important to the younger. 

Ten had spent three years in the dance group. That meant for three years, he hadn't been good enough to have a solo stage, and for three years, he had worked on his choreographing. Now he was finally ready — finally chosen as the main dancer, a perfect opportunity to show people what he was made of. 

However, with high expectations came a lot of pressure. Ten had spilt his worries to him one night: the pair were walking around a park, the sun had just set but the air temperature was still warm. Neither of them had spoken for a while, just enjoying each other’s company and being together. It was peaceful and comfortable. Over the months that they had gotten to know each other, and more importantly since to conversation inside Johnny’s apartment building, they had grown a kind of silent understanding. There were no longer any awkward pauses, conversation stopped naturally and flowed without force. That evening had been no different. 

“Sometimes I don't think I can do it.” 

Johnny looked up at the sound of Ten’s voice, raising an eyebrow in question. 

“—Be a dancer that is,” He sighed heavily. “I mean, of course, I love it, I love dancing and I live for the stage blah blah blah… But, I also worry that if I do well — if I get noticed — it could take all the fun away.” 

Johnny understood, how couldn't he. A memory of his father warning him about pursuing his dreams as a photographer sprung up in his mind, ‘Something’s only enjoyable until you start doing it for money’ he had stated when Johnny brought the conversation up at dinner one time.

Sure, His dad had meant well, not wanting his kid to get his hopes crushed, but he’d also been ultimately wrong, photography could be his passion and his job without him losing interest or enjoyment. 

To try and reassure Ten, he had told him just that, explaining why he hadn't taken photography further before this. “You know yourself, and you know how important dance is to you. Would you be able to give it up for a full-time job?” He questioned 

Ten shook his head, “Never.” 

Hearing those words spoken with such confidence filled Johnny with assurance. “Exactly, everyone has good days and bad days in their line of work, but if we just remind ourselves of why we’re doing it, everything will be worth it in the end.” Inside he hoped he was right. Pursuing any kind of art in this day and age was a risk — but if the opportunity was presented then it had to be taken, uncertainty thrown aside and anxieties ignored. 

And tonight was finally the night. Two months (there about) of constant practicing would be showcased in front of a large audience. 

It was already coming up for early afternoon. The sun was still high, and the store was still busy. Johnny had worked up a sweat, with all the shifting and stacking that he’d been doing — not difficult in this heat. He sighed heavily, placing down an empty box and wiping his forehead. His fringe was uncomfortably stuck to his skin, curling slightly at the ends; maybe he did need a haircut?

Just as he was taking a breather, he caught sight of Kiya exiting the office room. She had just finished putting in a new order, with the popularity of the store rising, new releases were selling a lot faster. Johnny was pleased to see the business booming. “Kiya,” He called out, picking up the box again and walking over to see her. 

“Hey, Johnny, what's up?” 

“I was just wondering, what time are you heading to the performance tonight. I know we have tickets booked already, but I’d quite like to wish them good luck before they head in, you know?” 

“Well, Gem and the others normally get there an hour and a half before the show. That way they can get ready, and warm up before the audience gets in. They’ve already done the main dress rehearsal so then it's just going over things with the rest of the group. I normally wave them off before they go in then hang around till the doors open — you’re welcome to join me, that way we can get the best seats.” She explained, obviously used to this kind of schedule. 

Johnny was relieved. This was new for him and his friends, it felt reassuring to know that they had someone to show them the ropes. “Ah that's great thank you, I knew I could trust you to know what's happening.” Kiya laughed at his comment, patting him on the back and shaking her head slightly.

“You’re welcome to invite the other two along as well, I would hate for them to miss out or get lost…” 

“You know what, that's probably a good idea,” Johnny chuckled, “so we’ll meet you at the venue at around 6:30.” 

“Yup sounds great, the others will be thrilled to see you… especially Ten.” She winked, chuckling slightly when Johnny was unable to hide the blush that crept up his neck. 

The two of them finished off their work, and Kiya made the decision to shut up early for the day — not wanting them to be in a rush later. “See you soon Johnny, don't be late.” She called, locking the shop before waving him off. 

“Don’t worry I’ll be there.” 

***

The rest of the evening went quickly, Johnny managed to persuade his friends to arrive early (not that this was difficult, the other two being more than happy to wish the dancers good luck). Then he spent his time getting ready. 

It turned out, Johnny had no idea how to dress for an occasion like this. Was this too formal? Was that too scruffy? What would the rest of the audience be wearing? These were the thoughts that flitted through his head as he got ready, rummaging through his clothing in hopes to find something that would work. 

As his favourite red shirt was nowhere in sight, he made a mental note to search the washroom later, before slipping into another patterned button down and french tucking it into his nicest jeans. Hoping that it would be suitable. 

He left his bedroom after attempting to somewhat style his hair, and came face to face with his roommates, “Well, someone’s dressed to impress.” Johnny scoffed at Yuta’s words, scratching at his neck and trying to cover his embarrassment. Noticing his reaction, his friend spoke up again, “I'm just joking man, don't stress, you look great!” he assured, looping an arm around his neck. 

“Yeah, don't listen to him, Johnny. He’s said the same to me many times, I think it's just his way of complimenting people.” Dongyoung added, shrugging at his friend's weird habits. 

Thankfully they hadn't spent much longer talking about it, instead quickly heading out the door and towards the venue. 

They arrived at the building with time to spare and went over to the backstage doors to wait. It wasn't long before the others turned up. They were chatting loudly, obviously excited for the evening.

Noticing the three of them, Kiya waved, grabbing her girlfriend’s hand and pulling her along behind her. To their side, Taeyong cheered happily at the sight and Ten stopped still, face splitting from shock to joy before he too raced over to meet them. 

“What are you doing here?” He questioned, grinning wide as he approached them, eyes trained on Johnny. 

“Uh,” Johnny stuttered, having expected Kiya to have told everyone, “We’re here to wish you luck.” He explained, not trying to stop the smile that appeared on his face. 

Ten’s eyes turned into crescents as he somehow managed to smile even more, practically throwing himself at Johnny, and planting a kiss firmly against his lips, “Thank you.” 

“Are we going to be getting this treatment as well?” Yuta interrupted, winking as Ten turned his face towards him and Dongyoung. 

“You better believe it.” Ten detached himself from Johnny, and instead leapt onto the other two, grabbing them both into a neck hold and placing a kiss on their cheeks. Johnny laughed loudly, clapping at the interaction. 

Ten made his way back over to Johnny’s side after that, standing so close that their hands were brushing slightly — neither one moved away. “You look great by the way, Johnny.” He complimented, eyes not so subtly, checking him out. 

“Thanks.” Johnny breathed out in reply, feeling the heavy gaze spread over him, “I wasn't sure what to wear… this is probably a bit overdressed, but I couldn't find my red shirt, so it had to do. I just didn't want to be seen as only the scruffy, stoner, photographer, you know?”

Ten nodded, laughing slightly before meeting his eyes, “Hmm, you do have a habit of slipping into that stereotype.”

“Hey!”

“I’m just kidding, but don't worry, you’re not overdressed. And you really do look amazing.” He leaned up straightening the collar and patting his hand on his chest — Letting it linger for a second, resting right over his heart. Johnny became increasingly aware of how fast it was beating. 

They chatted in the group for a couple more minutes before the other dancers began to arrive. “We should really head in now,” Taeyong announced, greeting the people who had arrived so far, before turning to face the group of friends again. “You guys ready?”

The two other dances nodded, picking up their kit bags and smiling at the rest of the group.

“Good luck guys!” the four of them called, smiling and hugging each one of them. 

Ten saved hugging Johnny for last, squeezing his hand and looking him directly in the eye, “Watch me tonight.” He said quietly — Johnny only nodded back, knowing his eyes wouldn’t be leaving Ten for the full show. 

With that the three of them were walking away, saying goodbye with one last wave and a sense of anticipation to come. 

***

It wasn't long before a crowd began to form outside the venue, friends, family and dance enthusiasts lining the streets. Johnny had watched some official types walk to the front and be welcomed in, guessing that they were the people who’d be handing out opportunities at the end of the night. 

They looked like the standard invigilator types that would normally turn up to these events, Johnny eyed them as they entered, trying to gauge what they were like. “These are the usual lot that come to this.” Kiya murmured, noticing Johnny’s stare. “Those two are fine.” She nodded in the direction of the younger woman, and the only male, “But that one, she can be a real nasty piece of work.” 

Johnny moved his gaze to the last invigilators, she looked strict: hair pulled back in a tight bun, formal clothing perfectly pressed without a wrinkle in sight, deep rouge lips, pursed tightly. She walked with the same air that the women who ran the group did, head held high — posture perfect from years of training. Just looking at her put Johnny on edge. “Try not to worry about her though. Gem, Ten and Taeyong have faced her before and they're bound to face her again. Plus she's not the one looking to employ new dancers tonight — she's just here to share her  _ sought after _ opinion.” Although Kiya was trying her best to reassure Johnny, he could tell from the way she sneered at the last statement that she disliked her as much as he did. 

Once the important people were inside, it wasn't long before the doors opened for the public, people filing in, tickets in hand and ready for a good show. 

Due to arriving early, the group of four were able to grab good seats on the front row. They were right in the centre, a perfect position to watch the full performance. The show was in two parts, the first half dedicated to the dance group their friends were part of, they’d be showcasing the three solo artists, breaking up the event with smaller group dances then finishing it off with the full group performance — choreographed by Ten. 

The lights began to fade, and the familiar notes of Ten’s solo stage played through the speakers. A pang of nerves welled up inside Johnny, anticipation making him tense. This all melted away, replaced with awe as Ten entered the stage. His hair was neatly styled, blond strands looking almost Champaign toned under the soft stage lighting, earrings glinting against his skin. 

However, that wasn't the first thing Johnny noticed. No instead, his eyes were drawn to the strangely familiar, red floral shirt, that was falling loosely over the tight jeans that Ten was wearing. 

“Isn’t that the shirt you were looking for?” Dongyoung asked, leaning to whisper in Johnny’s ear. 

“Uh, yeah, yeah it is…” 

Ten walked to the centre of the stage, body moving with the confidence of a well-trained dancer. He stopped still, eyes scanning the audience before landing directly on Johnny. A small, barely there, smile crept onto his face, and he was off. 

The music played, and Ten moved — Body spinning, swaying, dancing across the stage. He had developed the routine a lot since the last time Johnny had watched it, adding in different movements and flowing transitions. 

Although it was vastly different, there was one thing that stayed the same — Johnny’s inability to look away. He watched, eyes locked on the moving figure as he contorted his body in time with the music, perfectly portraying the feelings that the song evoked. Johnny felt his breath hitch, heart hammering in his chest. 

Everything about Ten was beautiful, but it went deeper than looks, deeper than personality — resonating in a higher art form that could only be displayed on stage — whether that be here in front a local audience, on the world stage in front of millions or in the limited rooftop space with only Johnny’s eyes to see him shine.

By the hush that had fallen over the audience, Johnny could see he was having the same effect on everyone. And, as the song came to its end, Ten panting hard, but smiling harder, a strong sense of pride welled up inside Johnny. 

The four friends in the front row shot up out of their seats, applauding with the rest of the audience and cheering loudly. Johnny had a grin splitting his face, unable to contain the happiness he felt. Ten bowed to the theatre of people, blowing a kiss to his friends in the front before heading off stage with a spring in his step. 

Thankfully the rest of the show passed without a hitch. After Ten, a couple small group performances took place, then Gem took the stage for her solo. She performed a contemporary ballet piece — tumbling across the stage with an air of grace and tranquillity. To his side Kiya watched with wide eyes, her hand clutching at her chest. Johnny completely understood what she was feeling. 

A little after that, it was Taeyong’s turn. Unlike the other two who focused on soft or emotive pieces, they went for the complete opposite, body popping and contorting in sharp jagged movements. It was mesmerising to watch. 

The first half rounded off with the final group performance. Choreographed by Ten but performed by the whole group, this dance, in particular, showed off Ten’s understanding of everyone’s strengths and weaknesses. He made sure each person got a moment all to themselves in the spotlight and also allowed the group to show off, while still creating a very put together routine. Johnny hoped the invigilators were paying attention. 

It came to an end and the dance group received a standing ovation. The applause was almost deafening. Each set of dancers came to the front for a bow — people cheering especially loud when the three soloists stepped forward. They were all beaming, weeks of effort finally paying off in one fantastic performance. Johnny didn’t envy the group going on next, not sure how anything could top what he’d just watched. 

After a few talkie bits from the group leader, bouquets were handed out, the dancers made their way off stage and the lights came up. 

Johnny and his friends were out of their seats in seconds, excitedly chatting about the show as they headed toward backstage. 

They walked through the crowded corridors, dodging other dancers as they talked animatedly about the show. It was busy: staff, dancers and spectators all walking around. The four friends found themselves pressed with their backs against a wall, keeping an eye out for the three dancers they were there for. 

Johnny, with his height allowing him to see over the heads of the other people, spotted them first. He stuck up a hand, waving it to gain their attention before motioning for his friends to follow him through the crowd. 

As soon as they were within talking distance, Kiya leapt onto Gem — smothering her girlfriend with kisses and congratulating her on the amazing performance. 

Johnny hung back for a second, allowing Dongyoung and Yuta to talk to the other two first. After all, they had been the ones going to dance with them over the last few months. 

Ten noticed this, quickly thanking the other two before locking his eyes into Johnny and moving towards him. His smile was bright, and his face had a light sheen of sweat covering it, he was still adorned in Johnny’s shirt, top buttons opened and smooth golden skin exposed. Johnny swallowed, reluctantly pulling his gaze away and back to Ten’s eyes — smiling more and pulling him into a hug. 

“Ten, you were amazing, I can’t believe how much that dance has developed and progressed since I last saw it.” He congratulated, pulling back from the hug in order to see Ten’s face. 

He was taken by surprise when instead of replying, Ten leant forward and captured his lips in a needy kiss. Strong arms snaking around his neck and pulling him into it. Johnny didn’t resist, being more than happy to kiss him back. He ran his hands down the front of  _ his _ shirt, feeling the familiar fabric against Ten’s body. 

“Does dancing turn you on?” Johnny joked, questioning Ten’s actions with a sarcastic tone of voice, once they had pulled apart 

“No, but you do.” Johnny felt his mouth go dry, not expecting such honesty from an obviously teasing question. “I could feel your eyes on me throughout the whole performance, watching, just like I asked, from the front row. You were… distracting, in the best kind of way.” 

“I see.” He paused, excitement buzzing around his system, “Is there anything I can do to help with that?” The two of them were pressed close, the kiss not leaving much room between them.

Ten looked up, checking around and noting how none of the attention was currently on them, before leaning impossibly closer and whispering in Johnny’s ear: “I kind of want you on your knees, want you to show me how much you can affect me.” 

If it wasn’t for the location they were currently in, Johnny would have dropped to his knees right then and there, arousal coursing through him at the dominance Ten was asserting. He desperately wanted to make Ten feel good, wanted to hear him cry his name, wanted to be the one to pull all sorts of dirty sounds out of his perfect mouth. 

The lust that appeared in Johnny’s eyes was obvious to Ten. He swallowed thickly, want thrumming through his own body. There was a dangerous glint in his eye as he voiced the next words: “I’m going to the bathroom.” 

“Me too.” Johnny practically choked out, flashing a forced smile at their other friends and turning back to Ten who had already started walking. 

“But guys? The invigilators will be out soon, can’t you just go when we get home?” Taeyong called after them, sounding slightly exasperated. 

“Let them go,” Johnny heard Gem say, as Dongyoung let out a snort of laughter and Yuta wolf whistled. Johnny didn’t pay any attention to them, instead, quickening his pace, in order to catch up with Ten. 

Thankfully, they didn’t end up in a bathroom. Instead, Ten led them to an empty dressing room (one that hadn’t been used for the performance) and locked the door behind them. 

As soon as this was done, Johnny didn’t waste any time, rounding on Ten and pushing him back against the door — kissing him passionately. He ran his hands through Ten’s hair, over his chest and down his body, palming him through his jeans. 

By this point, Ten was already worked up, body responding well to Johnny’s touch. 

It didn’t take long before Johnny was sinking to his knees, face level with Ten’s crotch. 

His mouth was watering as he slowly unbuckled Ten’s trousers. Pulling them down quickly. 

The groan that escaped Ten’s mouth was unmistakable, voice echoing out into the otherwise empty room. Johnny looked up, eyes meeting with Ten’s own hooded ones. With that, he grabbed the waistband of Ten’s boxers and went to pulled them the rest of the way down. 

However, as soon as he did this, Johnny was halted by a hand in his hair, stopping him from moving forward. 

“Before we begin,” Ten panted, voice thick with want, “does this mean you still want to try this, us, a relationship?” 

Johnny chuckled lowly, smiling up at the other man. “Ten, baby. Do you l think I’d be in this position if I didn’t?” 

Unable to argue with that logic, Ten loosened his grip, allowing Johnny to surge forward. 

***

He probably looked like a mess, hair mused, lips slick (with more than just spit) and swollen. By this point, he was also painfully hard and in desperate need of release.

“Let me take care of you,” Ten stated, after a few seconds of them both gaining their breath back. He zipped up his own pants and very carefully pushed Johnny down onto one of the benches. 

He was just working his flies open when a loud knock on the door disturbed them. “Ten,” it was Gem and by the sounds of things, it was urgent. 

“Five more minutes...” Johnny's voice broke slightly as he called out, desperate for just a bit more time alone with Ten. 

“I’m sorry guys but we don’t  _ have _ five more minutes. The invigilators are here to see you, we’ve been keeping them busy but they're done chatting to us now and really want to speak to the star of the show. 

I said I’d go and get you, but by the sounds of things they’re getting impatient, so you might want to come quickly.” 

Ten sighed, “Well, if you  _ hadn’t _ interrupted that might have  _ happened _ by now.” He stated, reluctant to leave Johnny like this. 

“Gross Ten, you know that’s not what I meant but whatever, just get out here ASAP okay?” 

The voice behind the door went quiet — Gem stepping away to give them some time to talk. 

Ten sighed heavily — leaning his forehead against Johnny’s and stroking a hand through his hair, “I am so sorry about this,” he breathed quietly, sounding very disappointed by the turn of events. “Gem is right though, I should probably get out there. You’re welcome to stay and finish yourself off, I totally understand.” He motioned to Johnny’s state, feeling bad that he couldn’t reciprocate at this time. 

Johnny just shook his head, leaning forward and capturing his lips in a slow kiss. Ten could taste himself on Johnny, evidence of their last activity clear for everyone out there too see — it only made Ten crave him more. “Nah it’s okay, I’d feel a bit weird if I just jerked off by myself in a changing room — plus, I don’t want to miss what the judges have to say. How about you just make it up to me later?” 

“Oh, you bet your fat ass I’m gonna make it up to you later! You won’t know what’s hit you.” Ten assured, making them both laugh, “Come on, our audience is waiting.” With that he stood up, pulling Johnny to his feet and trying to make them both look a little more presentable (it didn’t work). 

They exited the room, hand in hand, Gem hurriedly tilting her head in the direction of the hallway, and egging them to hurry up. 

As soon as they rounded the corner, they were met with the exasperated stares of their friends, and the more stern/professional expression of the two female invigilators. 

“Sorry I’m late,” Ten started, flashing his most professional smile, “I was er... a little preoccupied.” 

Johnny stifled a laugh and Kiya rolled her eyes, subtly shoving her jacket into Johnny’s hand and silently telling him to cover up. Johnny sent her a thankful smile, quickly wrapping it around his waist. 

“Very well, Mr Leechaiyapornkul, you're here now so we may as well begin.” The stern lady addressed, before launching into her speech. She explained the good parts, the things he needed to improve on and her overall thought — at times she was harsh, but Ten didn’t look the least bit fazed, taking it all in his stride and smiling politely at her (post orgasm bliss helping him somewhat, with staying calm). “And finally, I would have preferred you to be dressed in something more serious — something that expressed the dance better not, this.” She narrowed her eyes at the loose shirt that was falling off one of Ten’s shoulders. 

Johnny wanted so badly to disagree with her statement, explain how it was the perfect choice and held a lot of meaning to the dance. But at a squeeze of Ten’s hand, he stopped himself, instead, watching Ten thank her for the advice. 

“Overall Ten,” She finished, taking a step forward and sticking out her hand, “you did a good job today, I look forward to seeing what you bring to the dance world in the future.” Ten shook her hand, bowing his head slightly before she walked away. 

That left only the younger female invigilator. She smiled kindly at the dancers, stepping up to address them all. “And now that everyone’s here, I can finally talk to you as a group.” 

The three dancers shared a look, stepping forward to form a line in front of her. 

“I’m extremely impressed by the quality of dance I saw from you. Because of this, I would like to offer you all a place in my dance company.” She finished her statement with a clap of her hand, waiting for the dancers to react. 

“Oh my god, really?” It was Taeyong who spoke up first, voice going higher at the end, unable to contain their excitement. 

“Thank you for this offer.” Gem said, only just able to keep her cool. 

“You don’t have to rush to accept it now — sleep on it. And when you're ready, shoot me an email. Our term begins in October, so just confirm things before then.” 

The group thanked her, each shaking her hand and feeling giddy from her offer. 

“Oh but Ten,” she spoke up before fully turning away, “I’ll let it slide this time, but she’s right you know — this shirt is definitely not appropriate dance-wear...” She raised an eyebrow at him. “I’m surprised your group leader let you get away with it.” 

“Well, technically she didn’t,” Ten admitted sheepishly, trying to straighten his shirt as much as he could, “I told her I was going to wear something else, I knew she wouldn’t let this slide. I’ll probably be in a lot of trouble later.” 

The invigilator looked at Ten with confusion, obviously trying to depict why he would put himself in this position. Johnny stepped in to explain: “I’m sorry Miss, you see that’s my shirt and, it holds a lot of meaning to the dance — I know from an outsider's perspective this doesn’t matter, but it meant a great deal to me.” 

She looked over, scanning Johnny with narrowed eyes. “Yes, I figured as much, well that’s not my place to judge. Good work again all of you, I hope to see you at my studio come October.” She flashed a bright smile, turning on her heels and exiting the corridor. 

As soon as she was out of sight, the three dancers leapt up, cheering loudly and embracing one another. The rest of the friends quickly joined in, jumping together as they celebrated the dancers' success. 

Ten wrapped his arms around Johnny’s neck pulling him down for another kiss, smiling wide against his lips. 

“You did it, you all did it!” Johnny cheered against Ten’s jaw, hoisting him up and spinning him in a circle. Ten let out a loud laugh, throwing his head back and letting Johnny twirl him around. 

“And before anything else happens, I just need to know,” Yuta piped up, stepping away from the group slightly to address Johnny and Ten. “are you two...” 

He didn’t have to say anything more because both Johnny and Ten were nodding their heads enthusiastically — smiles plastering their face. “Yeah,” Ten confirmed, “we’re going to give us a go.”

“Fucking finally!” Kiya all but yelled, clapping her hands in glee, “Right, so many good things have happened his evening — we have to celebrate. Let’s splash out a little and go somewhere fancy.” 

The rest of the group agreed but Ten looked reluctant, flicking his gaze to Johnny. “Thank you guys, that would be amazing but, if it’s okay, I think me and Johnny will join you later on, we’ve still got some unfinished business to get to...” 

Johnny felt his knees weaken at the mention of more — Ten obviously wanting to keep his promise and take care of him as soon as he could. 

“Fine,” Yuta rolled his eyes. “Everyone can come back to our place and get ready. You guys take Ten’s apartment all to yourself and when you’re ready, we’ll meet at that pizza place. What do you think?” 

Johnny nodded quickly while Ten agreed, grabbing him by the hand and quickly pulling him out of the building. 

***

In the end, Ten did make it up to Johnny. Pushing him down onto his bed the moment they got through the door and kissing him feverishly. 

It didn’t take long for Johnny to become fully worked up again. Pressing his head back into the soft covers and moaning out Ten’s name — breaking the kiss. 

Ten didn’t hesitate after that, trailing hot, wet kisses down his jaw and over his neck. Biting at the soft expanse of skin that spread over his collarbones. 

Johnny’s hands were already roaming his back, coming to rest in his hair and pulling ever so slightly. Ten gasped, loving the way it felt — Johnny, tugging on his hair, all needy and pliant under him. 

He slid to the floor after that, positioning himself between his legs, "I'm not going to last long." Johnny warned, body tight with tension and close to completely letting go.

"It's fine, I made you wait long enough." Ten assured, moving his hands to Johnny's waistband and quickly pulling it down.

***

Round two took place an hour or so later. The steam from the shower, clouding their vision, moans lost to the sound of water. 

After that, they lounged out on Ten’s bed, a soft song playing in the background while the two of them cuddled — comfortable in the embrace of the other's arms. 

They had been quiet for some time, both satisfied and content — just listening to music and enjoying the other’s company. 

However, Johnny couldn’t quite keep still, fidgeting slightly. He was happy they were finally doing this, like really fucking pleased. After all, he’d only been wanting it since his first few months in the city.

But, to get to this point they’d had a few ups and downs, a couple of setbacks that they still hadn’t talked about. It was this that Johnny dwelled on now, even with the beautiful stranger from the train, no longer a stranger, and pressed comfortably against his side — arm resting loosely over his waist. 

“Ten,” he mumbled out.

“Hmm?” 

“I was just wondering,” he paused, trying to gather his thoughts, “that time in my apartment, when we almost kissed, why did you leave?” He let the question hang in the air, waiting for Ten to tense up.

However, the moment never came, instead, he let out a soft sigh and propped himself up to get a better look at Johnny. “You’ll think it's stupid.” 

“I won’t, I promise.” 

Ten hummed again, resting his head on Johnny’s chest and tracing patterns onto his abdomen. “I was just scared to get close.” He admitted quietly, voice sending vibrations through Johnny’s skin. “You seemed to come into my life so quickly and it scared me. It scared me that I liked you, and it scared me that I wanted to let you in.” 

He took a deep breath. “It didn’t help that you just slipped so easily into my friend group — like, they literally all love you. And you brought more people along, who are also great. I couldn’t imagine life without any of you now.”

He moved so that he was positioned just over Johnny, looking down on him. “We seemed to naturally gravitate towards each other — no matter how hard I tried to stop it, put distance between us. In the end, I realised I was just hurting both of us, from then on, I couldn’t keep away even if I wanted to. But I was still scared, so I admit, when you went to kiss me I panicked — even though I wanted it too. I also used the dance as an excuse to put things off for a while — give you a get out card, you know? Just in case you changed your mind.” 

Johnny reached up brushing his hand through Ten’s hair, then moved to rest it on his shoulder. 

“But even with that, for some reason, your stubborn ass stuck around anyway.” 

“As I said before, there really is no one quite like you. That fact won’t change, no matter what city we’re in — you’re still the person who’s had my attention from day one.” 

Ten leaned down and kissed him then, it was soft and unhurried. The gentle press of lips used as a way to acknowledge what the other had said. 

***

They did, eventually, manage to catch up with the others, meeting them at the pizza place just over an hour after the others had arrived. 

Their friends had already ordered, four large pizzas and several different sides were spread over the table — cans of drink dotted around here and there. 

“I like how this is your idea is fancy.” Ten stated as they walked up, slipping into a pair of empty chairs, Johnny’s arm resting automatically around his neck. 

“About time you two, we were starting to wonder if you were even gonna show at all.” Dongyoung chirped, stuffing a slice of pizza into his mouth and flicking a crust at them.

“Well, better late than never,” Gem added, Kiya and her were sat close — any distance feeling like too much. 

“Honestly I’m surprised you weren’t longer...” Taeyong winked in their direction. 

Just then Yuta arrived back at the table with a beer in his hand. “Hey lovers,” He chided, leaning his arms over their shoulders and placing a sloppy kiss on each cheek: “we missed you.” 

They all settled down for the evening then, digging into the food and celebrating the dancers' success. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are officially just over half way through now!! 
> 
> Thank you so much for reading this far, and I hope you continue to enjoy ~~


	10. Beautiful

It was easy, falling into a routine with Ten. With spending so much time with each other over the last few months, they pretty much already had one. 

The only difference now was they regularly stayed over each other’s apartments, kissed openly and got each other off. 

It was new, it was exciting, it was still kind of terrifying. 

For the most part, however, they carried on like normal. Johnny would still meet Ten after dance practice (the three dancers had quickly accepted the invitation from the company, but as they were starting in October, that gave them one last month of dancing in the familiar warehouse. 

He would still pop in to see him at work. 

Ten would still come to pester him at the record store whisking him away to talk music. And they still did the odd photoshoots together — Johnny joking that his portfolio was mostly taken up with pictures of Ten by this point. 

The main thing to change was their title for each other, ‘boyfriend’ now easily rolled off the tongue, followed by other pet names like ‘baby’ or ‘sweetheart’. 

Their friends found them adorably unbearable. 

***

Both Johnny and Ten were lucky enough to get several overlaps on their days off (they liked to think it was ‘meant to be’, but in reality, it was probably because Johnny’s boss was one of their best friends, who happened to know Ten’s schedule).

Just like before they were dating, the time they had together was spent comfortably in the secluded space of one of their apartments. 

Today was no different: Johnny had made his way over to Ten’s after breakfast that morning. A spring in his step and a smile on his face at the idea of spending a full day, completely undisturbed with his boyfriend — something they had yet been able to do since becoming a couple. 

Ten had texted in the morning, telling Johnny to bring his Polaroid camera, and saying something about not having seen him use it for a while. Not being able to argue with that, Johnny grabbed his things, loading in a new pack of film, in advance, before heading over. 

There was an air of anticipation that he couldn't seem to shake as he hopped into the subway, eager to get to Ten’s as soon as possible. 

He let himself into the apartment, being instantly treated to the sight of Ten, dressed in nothing but a pair of booty shorts and a loose fitted tank top, stretching up to put away the dishes. 

Johnny stood a little starstruck by the doorway, eyes gazing over the man in front of him, taking in his toned back and defined arms. He blinked a couple of times, swallowing hard before making his way into the room. “Here, let me get that.” He offered, reaching for the plate and intending to make Ten’s job easier. 

What he wasn't expecting was Ten to push the plate further away from him, instead, climbing easily onto the counter and placing it in that way. Once he was finished, he turned around, sitting himself down on the counter and swinging his legs slightly: “Thanks, but I've got it.” He stated, pulling gently at the loose T-shirt material on Johnny’s chest. 

“I can see that,” Johnny nodded, allowing himself to nestle in-between Ten’s legs, resting a hand on each bare thigh. From this position, they were practically eye to eye, and Johnny was treated for the second time that day, watching as Ten’s eyelashes batted once, then twice, before closing all together and pulling him in for a kiss. 

Their lips pressed together hungrily, setting the mood for the rest of their day. Ten wasted no time in licking into Johnny’s mouth, moaning lewdly at the slide of the tongues and tugging Johnny closer until they were chest to chest. 

Johnny’s own hands were travelling upwards, moving from Ten’s thigh to his waist, then finally slipping under Ten’s tank top and caressing over his sides and back, letting out his own groan as his senses were completely overwhelmed.

Ten was the first to break them apart, pulling away only when he was desperate for breath, and resting their foreheads together. “I missed you,” it had only been one day, “missed your lips, missed the things you can do with them.” Johnny hummed at the praise, pushing forward to steal another kiss. He only briefly managed this, before Ten was pulling away once more. “Do you have your camera?” He asked, smiling sweetly as he spoke. 

“Yeah, of course, it's just in my bag,” he gestured behind him, reluctant to move from his current position. 

“Great, I thought we could take some pictures today.” 

“Sure, any suggestions?”

“Actually, I do have one idea…” putting some space between them, Johnny watched as Ten pulled his top over his head, taking his time and stretching his arms above him, before dropping the garment. He then pushed gently at Johnny, making him step back and allowing himself to hop down from the counter. 

His shorts were next to be discarded, slipping down his narrow hips and pooling at his feet — it came as no surprise that Ten wasn't wearing any underwear, now standing completely naked in front of Johnny. 

“Nudes?” He questioned, almost dumbly as his eyes trailed over Ten’s body. 

“Yeah nudes,” Johnny reached out a hand, pressing it against his side and trailing it down. Running it over the smooth curve of his hip. Ten let out a shiver before slapping it away, “You can’t get me worked up until after the shoot okay, I looked it up any nude photographs explicitly showing penetration or erect dicks are counted as pornographic imagery. And if that happened, you wouldn’t be able to use these in your portfolio. I think that would be a bit of a shame.”

“Okay,” Johnny agreed, pulling his eyes away from Ten’s body and back to his face, “Let’s do this then.” 

They spent the best part of an hour shooting, setting up the shots in Ten’s room. Johnny focused on capturing intimacy and comfort, using soft natural light that was diffused through the blinds to capture the curves and angles of Ten. 

As always, he was captivated by his boyfriend, not having to try hard to pose him and being happier just to wait for inspiration to strike. 

In between shots, they filled in time with needy kisses and appreciative touches — defiantly breaking the rule of not getting worked up by the sixth or seventh shot. Still, they made do, Johnny, making sure to focus on the upper body or Ten’s face. Capturing the blush on his chest and his soft almost spaced-out expression.

"You look beautiful," Johnny had uttered, briefly placing his camera down, to move in for another kiss, no longer afraid of showering his boyfriend in compliments. 

Ten practically keened at his words, twisting himself to get a better look at Johnny, and reaching a hand out to pull him down for more.

Throughout the shoot, Johnny had also been losing garments. It had started with his jacket, then his t-shirt, jeans and now finally underwear. Once he had become fully naked, Ten had looked at him with such desire in his eyes, that Johnny had almost chucked his precious camera behind him in favour of pleasing his boyfriend instead. “Don’t,” Ten had told him, “we’ve only got one more frame, might as well use it up.” 

Johnny tightened his grip around the camera, leaning forward to where Ten was lying on the bed and linking their hands. He snapped the picture, not caring about the angle or perfecting the composition. “There,” He stated, finally putting the camera, and all 8 polaroids down, “We’re finished.” 

A smirk formed on Ten’s face as he beckoned Johnny over, “Oh baby,” he drawled, “I think you’ll find we're only just getting started.” And with that, he crashed their lips together once more, pulling Johnny on top of him. 

***

The couple spent the rest of the day napping, curled up together with nothing and no one to disturb them. 

By the time the evening rolled around and Ten’s roommates began to arrive home, they were both well-rested and completely satisfied. 

At some point they had gravitated from Ten’s bed to the living room, flicking through TV channels before settling on a random show. 

Taeyong was the first to arrive. they walked in, smiling fondly at their friends before making it into the kitchen area and groaning loudly, “Guys, no hate or anything but as you’ve both been at home today, and the rest of us have been out, I kind of thought you’d do the washing up.” They finished, crossing their arms and turning to face the couple with a raised eyebrow. 

“Sorry Tae,” Johnny smiled sheepishly, he would have moved to get up but Ten, who had made himself comfortable in his lap, seemed unfazed and unwilling to move. 

“I’ll do it later, don’t worry.” Ten reasoned, snuggling further into Johnny’s warmth. “I’m too comfortable right now.” 

“Fine,” Taeyong sighed, “but you know Gem will be mad if they’re not done by the time she gets back.”

Ten waved them off, barely sparing a second glance, gaze instead trailing back to whatever was on TV. Johnny shook his head slightly, fully prepared to help clean up before he had to leave — for now though, he continued to run a hand through his boyfriend's hair. They’d get around to it eventually.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a Short and sweet Chapter for the early stages of their relationship
> 
> Hope you like it~~


	11. Fall

Before they all knew it, summer gave way to fall: the air grew cooler, the leaves began to turn crisp, the skies became clouded. 

As the summer heat left, so did the holidaymakers — leaving in large groups and clearing out the streets, making the city seem almost quiet.

The group of friends, who had been working off their feet for the past few months, were  _ finally _ able to take a breather — the strain of the summer months fading away like the sun itself. 

October started and so did a new chapter. The three dancers saying goodbye to what they’d known for the past few years and saying hello to new opportunities. 

They started attending the dance company at the beginning of the month. Discussing contracts and sorting out schedules. At this point, they would still have to continue with their part-time jobs on the side, but the hope was to be able to move away from that eventually. 

Johnny threw himself into his photography. Now with more time on his hands, he was able to work with Kiya to help her produce a portfolio — just like he had promised those eight long months ago. 

The first few photoshoots had been a good start, but by now, she was in need of something new. 

Half of him couldn't believe he was still here, in New York City, surrounded by people he loved and pursuing his dreams. It felt almost too surreal, too perfect (even with the cracks in his bedroom wall, and the lack of money in his pocket). 

Yuta and Dongyoung continued to be a source of comfort to Johnny — there after a bad day to share a beer and bitch about their misfortune, or equally, the first people to turn to when celebrating success. Both of them were carrying on like usual. Dongyoung’s part as an extra had been a success (or as successful as a background character could be), and Yuta, had landed himself a role in the chorus of a local production (not quite the Broadway lights he was dreaming of, but at least it was a start).

The month drew to an end with celebration, the group throwing a party for Yuta’s 22nd birthday. What had started off as a small get together, ended as a big event — there were the seven of them, the majority of the dance group, Yuta’s theatre buddies and some close acquaintances from his past. 

Fitting them all in their tiny apartment had failed instantly, and instead, the group headed to some nearby club. 

They ended up dancing all night — only crashing out long after the sun had risen. Yuta had thanked them all for the best birthday celebration, promising to hold just as crazy a party for them.

As for his relationship with Ten, their first two months together had gone from strength to strength. They really did seem to flow together, a silent understanding falling between them. 

Johnny was there to support Ten with starting the new chapter of his life, and Ten continued to be Johnny’s muse — inspiring him throughout the mundane everyday life. 

They were still in the early stages, taking their time to explore and get to know each other at a more intimate level. Every inch of skin, every freckle, mole, scar, insecurity. 

It was a new experience — letting someone in — for both of them. 

New, and still somewhat terrifying. But, completely exhilarating at the same time. 

Nowhere was this truer, then when wrapped in the covers of Johnny’s bed, bodies intertwined and the outside world long forgotten. 

It was times like this that Johnny felt the closest to Ten, mind an endless spiral of his name, body pliant and needy — completely lost in the moment. 

Unfortunately, the perfect bubble they had built around themselves couldn't last forever, and on the 3rd of November, it popped. 

It was their day off. After spending the night at his own apartment, Johnny had been the first to wake. Not wishing to disturb his sleeping boyfriend on one of his rare lie ins, he decided to carefully exit the room and make them both breakfast instead. 

It was already mid-morning, and by this point, they were the only two home. Yuta had gone to work, and Dongyoung, to an important audition. The apartment was quiet, still, undisturbed. 

He was just finishing plating up their brunch when Ten stepped out of the bedroom. 

Johnny looked up at the soft press of lips against his neck, smiling at his still half-asleep boyfriend. He looked adorably soft, dressed in one of Johnny’s t-shirts and a pair of his own sweatpants, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, hair sticking up in all directions. “You cooked breakfast,” he stated, more to himself than anyone, slouching into a chair and beginning to eat. 

Johnny quickly joined him, sliding in, on the other side of the table. From where he was sitting, he could see a frown etched into Ten’s forehead, a slight pout on his lips as he picked at the food in front of him. “Is something wrong?” He coxed.

Ten only sighed, putting his fork down and standing to get a drink, “I can’t hide anything from you, huh?” He let out a laugh, that sounded much more forced and bitter, than it did genuine. 

Johnny felt his own forehead crease, suddenly unsure of what to say. “You can talk to me.” He eventually settled with. 

“It’s my mom’s birthday.”

_ Oh  _

“It’s my mom’s birthday and I haven't spoken to her in the last four and a bit years, and it sucks because I don't even know how she is, or if she misses me or if she even cares.” He stabbed angrily into his food, frown deepening. “We haven't spoken since I left, and do you want to know the last thing she said to me?” 

Johnny couldn't say he did, but by the looks of things, Ten wasn't waiting for his agreement, launching into it anyway. “She told me that if I left, I would no longer have a place in their lives... this was after she kicked me out by the way. I haven't had contact with them since.” He sounded almost broken as he spoke, spitting the words out with as much venom as possible — an attempt to hide the hurt he was feeling. 

Johnny felt sick. The food in front of them, long forgotten. 

“Ten, I'm sorry.” What else was there to say, he stood up, walking around the table to embrace the younger, pulling him close and letting him take all the comfort he needed. 

Ten clung back, breathing hard against his shoulder. “I just wish I could show her how wrong she was, or maybe just see if she had changed her mind or, or, just hear her voice.” Johnny nodded while he spoke, pulling him closer. 

They were quiet for a second, then, without thinking, Johnny opened his mouth, thoughtless words toppling out. “Why don't you call her?” 

The mood changed instantly. Ten tensed, pushing back until he was holding him at arm's length, “Excuse me?”

“Well,” Johnny hesitated, every part of his body was screaming for him to stop talking, to backtrack. But the more stubborn part of him wanted to persevere — after all, it was just his opinion, he should be allowed to share it, “I think you should call her, I mean like you said, it’s been years, surely she’d be pleased to hear from you after all this time.” 

“What would you know?” Ten’s voice was getting steadily louder. He took a step away from Johnny, obviously taking offence at what he had said, “Really Johnny, what the  _ fuck _ would you know about my family? Do you really think they’d react well to hearing from me?  _ They _ cut ties with  _ me,  _ remember?” 

“But it’s been  _ years _ .” He found himself repeating, matching Ten’s tone, “If you made the first move then surely they’d see you’re being the bigger person and at least hear what you have to say?” He sighed, not quite sure how this got so out of hand, “Look, even after all I've done to my family, they’re still happy to hear from me—”

“Fucking great,” Ten threw his arms in the air “I don't get it, Johnny, if your life was so goddamn perfect back home then why are you here wasting your time with me?” His words stung, Johnny folded his arms defensively. However, it was Ten’s next sentence that delivered the final blow: “What are you running away from Johnny?” 

“Oh, so this is about  _ me _ now?” His heart was beating fast, words cutting straight into his chest. 

“ _ Apparently _ it is.”

“Fine, fucking fine, you  _ really _ want to know? You want to know what I'm running from? Well, the answers quite obvious. I’m running from myself.” The words spilt out before he could stop himself, “I always have been. I'm running from myself, running from the person I had become, running from the expectations. 

I didn't like the  _ ‘me’  _ I was turning into in Chicago, didn't like the direction I was headed and to be honest, I didn't see the point in continuing.” He stopped, breathing heavily through his nose, Ten was still stood in front of him, refusing to make eye contact. “I ran because I didn't know what would happen if I stayed.” 

His words hung heavily in the room.

Ten didn't look at him as he stormed into Johnny’s room. He didn't look again when he emerged seconds later, a bag with his belongings in hand. He grabbed his jacket, slipped into his shoes and tugged open the door. 

He didn't say a word as he left, slamming it with enough force to shake the whole room. 

Johnny didn't even try to follow him, too angry himself to try and reason with him. “Fuck you too.” He yelled, knowing full well that the sound of his words wouldn't reach him. His voice broke towards the end, making him sound more desperate and pathetic than anything else.

This hadn't at all been how he thought his day would go. 

Pacing the room, he let out a sound of frustration and pulled open the window. Stepping out onto the balcony, he shivered against the cold air and got out a cigarette, quickly lighting it. His hand shook as he took his first drag, angry tears beginning to burn at the corners of his eyes. 

Was he always going to have to tiptoe around Ten? Or was it him who went too far this time? 

The smoke flowing into his lungs did nothing to calm his mind, only causing extra irritation. Ten had asked him to quit recently and he hadn't even managed that, brushing him off with the false promise that he would try and cut down. 

He stubbed it out, quickly lighting another and inhaling again — wishing the smoke would just suffocate him. 

When this again didn't offer any relief, the tears he’d been desperately holding back finally broke. He stifled a sob, chucking the packet over the side of the building and stamped on his lighter for good measures, watching the broken plastic shards fall through the metal grating under his foot. 

It was about an hour later, when the anger had melted away, and the tear tracks had dried on his face, that Johnny attempted to contact Ten. 

He was sat at the table, food from this morning still in front of him, apologies on the tip of his tongue. 

Looking back at the situation, he could see he’d been in the wrong, knowing full well how touchy Ten could get about his family, but continuing to push it anyway. 

He should have been there to comfort Ten, not seem like he was taking sides. 

He held his head in his hands, phone ringing by his ear: “please pick up, please pick up, please—” it went to voicemail. “ _ Shit _ .” Johnny hissed, redialing the number, a new sense of worry washing over him. 

Ten was trying to block him out. 

***

7:30 pm rolled around, and Yuta and Dongyoung arrived at the apartment. 

Johnny was lying on the couch, staring blankly up at the ceiling. From this position, he couldn’t see his friends faces, but even so, he could tell something was wrong. 

The pair were talking in hushed whispers, the very obvious sound of someone crying making its way into Johnny’s ears.  _ Great _ , seems like they were all having a crap day. 

“We’re home now, it’s gonna be okay.” Yuta’s voice hushed softly, the door clicked shut, and footsteps continued to get closer. “Sit yourself down here, I’ll get you some water.” 

“Thank you,” Dongyoung replied, letting out a shuddering breath and stifling another sob. 

Neither one of his roommates had paid him any mind at this point — Johnny was happy to keep it that way. 

Yuta walked back over a few seconds later with a drink for Dongyoung, the sound of crying slowly subsiding. 

Unable to ignore his friends anymore, Johnny raised his head: “What happen?” He croaked, voice breaking after hours of disuse.

Concerned eyes looked him over — Yuta instantly noticing something was up. “The big audition Dongyoung was going for today, he didn’t get it.” His roommate explained, squeezing Dongyoung’s hand as he spoke. “They just didn’t reject him in a particularly gentle way—”

“They told me to give up.” Dongyoung cut in, voice weak as he explained the events, “They told me to give up and go back to Korea. Said I’m not cut out for this line of work.” He sniffled loudly, rubbing angrily at his eyes that were threatening to spill over again. 

“When he didn’t turn up to dance practice I was worried, then after it finished I found him crying just outside — thought it was best to get him home after that.” 

“Dongyoung,” Johnny moved to sit at a better angle, “I’m so sorry you had to go through that.” He had seen his friend after a rejection before, Dongyoung’s normal reaction was to mope for a couple of hours before brushing it off and getting on with the next audition. 

But this was different, this had been a part that Dongyoung was actually interested in, a part he felt he was perfect for. Johnny had never seen him break down like this. 

“Anyway, are you alright? I don't mean to be rude but, you look like shit.” Yuta finally walked over to him, crouching down beside the sofa and watching as Johnny sunk back down into the cushions — eyes once again, becoming trained on the ceiling. 

“Yeah, wasn't Ten here this morning, where is he?” 

The line of questioning made Johnny’s headache, where was Ten? Did the younger even want anything to do with him now? He didn't want to think about the questions, didn't want to answer his roommates. “Johnny,” Yuta coxed when he scrunched his eyes shut — realising how red and swollen they probably were, “what happened?” 

“We had a fight.” Johnny admitted, not being able to lie to his friends, “Ten stormed out, I haven't been able to get in contact with him since.”

“Well, that's okay. It happens, couples fight, I’m sure you’ll both apologise to each other and have loud make-up sex tomorrow or something, he’ll come around, just give him time yeah.” Yuta seemed very sure of himself, making light of the situation and patting Johnny on the arm. 

“No, you don't understand, I think I've really messed things up.” Johnny launched into his explanation: telling them about Ten’s parents, the touchy subject, how Ten had always been tense around bringing them up, and how he had pushed him to breaking point. “And then I snapped, spilling my own sob story and he left and,” Johnny shook his head, eyes watering once more, “you should have seen the look in his eyes. They were hard, almost uncaring if it wasn't for the obvious hurt that he was trying to cover. I broke his trust.” He let out a shuddering breath, not daring to look at his roommates' expressions. 

The room was silent. 

Dongyoung was the first to move, standing from the armchair and walking over to Johnny: “I’ll have one of your cigarettes now Johnny.” He all but demanded — sticking out his hand.

“Damn okay Dongyoung, that's more like it. Come on Johnny, some fresh air and nicotine will be good for you.” 

Refusing to move, Johnny chuckled dryly, shaking his head, eyes still staring upwards — trailing them over the watermarks; the building stained from years of being lived in. “Wish I could help you guys, I really do but… I quit.” He let the statement lie stagnant in the room.

Yuta’s face appeared in his line of vision. 

His expression, turning to one of disbelief. 

Quickly forcing his jaw shut, lips forming a thin line, he clambered onto the sofa, leaning over to get a better look at his friend: “I’ll go get some more then.” 

Johnny just shook his head, smiling sadly, “Nah, don't bother.” He pulled out a packet of nicotine gum, waving it in front of Yuta’s face. It had been a gift from Ten, a nudge in the right direction. Johnny had almost forgotten about it, only finding it when he had flopped onto the sofa. “I've got this.” He lay his arm back down, resting it above his head now, gum still in hand. 

“You’re welcome to have some if you like, hadn't you quit when I arrived?” He recalled, thinking back to his first day in the city, “I got you back into this, so how about we get out together?”

Seeing he wasn't going to get much more out of Johnny, Yuta rolled off the sofa, slumping against the side in defeat: “Fine,” He sighed, shaking his head, “we’re going to need a lot of alcohol for this.” 

And so, the three friends set about getting themselves shit faced. 

They started with beer but quickly moved on to cheap liquor. The alcohol burned as it travelled down their throats and settled uncomfortably in their gut. It didn't take long for the three of them to become pretty out of it. 

A voice in the back of Johnny’s head reminded him that drinking on a practically empty stomach was definitely not the smartest of ideas, but right now he didn't care, accepting another shot from Dongyoung and knocking it back. 

The mood had lightened considerably by midway through the night, the friends were finally laughing and even being able to somewhat enjoy themselves. 

A part of Johnny could almost forget why they were doing this in the first place...  _ almost forget _ . Desperately trying to push thoughts of Ten out of his head. 

It didn't work, and at 4 am, Johnny was emptying his guts into the bathroom toilet, gripping the seat with white knuckles and scrunching his eyes shut. 

Yuta was there in a second, seeming much soberer as he held back Johnny’s fringe and rubbed his back. He left for a second, reappearing with a glass of water. 

Johnny had chugged the drink down, body feeling completely dehydrated and weak. “I’m okay,” He rasped, pushing himself up and brushing off Yuta’s concerned hands, before making his way back into the living room. 

Dongyoung had passed out at some point on the armchair, currently curled around a pillow and snoring softly. Johnny flopped back onto the sofa, deciding that his friend had the right idea and quickly falling into a deep sleep. 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahh I’m so sorry about the angst!! 
> 
> I promise it won’t stay sad for long


	12. Wait

Johnny knew he was in pain when he woke up, body aching, head pounding. His mouth tasted like shit and his stomach was churning. 

At the sound of the bathroom door creaking, He reluctantly cracked an eye open, regretting it instantly as the light in the room assaulted his retinas — making him groan in pain. 

A fresh-faced and clean haired Yuta stepped out, he shook his head slightly at his friend's pain and headed across the room to prepare a greasy hangover cure. “How are you feeling Johnny?” He asked, pulling out a frying pan and turning on the radio, much to Johnny’s complaints. 

“What time is it?” He croaked back, trying and failing to clear his throat.

“12:30, do you remember much from last night?”

Johnny closed his eyes again, thinking back to yesterday. Unfortunately, his memories were all still intact — they made his head spin, images of his fight with Ten flashing back. He nodded glumly, reaching for his phone and hoping for the notification he was desperate to see.

All he was greeted with, was a text from Kiya: 

_ Yuta told me what happened, you're probably feeling a bit worse for wear this morning, so take the day off.  _

He dropped his phone back down — she hadn't said anything about Ten.

About half an hour later, Dongyoung re-emerged from his room, eyes swollen and wrapped in a blanket. Apparently, he had woken up earlier, and taken himself off to bed for a couple more hours rest. 

Now, he made his way over to the table, smiling at Yuta and thanking him for the food. 

“You don't need to thank me, someone has to take care of you kids.” Quipped Yuta, trying to raise a reaction out of Johnny. It half worked, the older letting out a grunt before pushing himself into a seated position. “Food‘s ready, you should definitely eat Johnny.” 

“Yeah, I will.” He stretched his stiff limbs, making his way over to the table. 

The group dug in, eating quietly, and quickly clearing three plates of food. Yuta was right and the greasy fry up had definitely helped ease some of Johnny’s hangover. He promised to wash up as thanks, after freshening up.

***

“You talked to Kiya?” Johnny’s question came out as more of a demand, while he finished up the dishes. 

“Yeah.” 

“Why?” 

Over the morning, Johnny had been wanting to ask, but felt unsure of how to breach the topic — apparently bluntly blurting it out, was the way his brain had decided to go with. 

“Well, for a start, she called me. She wanted to check up on you, because, you know, we’re all friends.” He looked over at Johnny with a raised eyebrow. “All I did was tell her what you told us, and explained how you were currently very hungover and fast asleep on the couch.” 

“Did she say anything about…” He didn't have to finish the sentence because Yuta was already shaking his head. 

“I'm sorry, Ten didn't come into conversation. I don't even know if she’d been over Gem’s last night.” Johnny nodded, sighing deeply. “All I can say is she would have told us if something was wrong, so you don't need to worry about him.” 

Despite Yuta’s words, Johnny knew he couldn't stop the anxiety that began to rise. Even if Ten was okay (which he really hoped he was), he didn't know what was going to happen next. 

“How are you so alive and at it anyway?” Johnny changed the topic, noticing his friend's apparent lack of hangover. 

At the question, Yuta just shrugged: “I could see you two were going to go hard, so I just didn't drink as much.”

Johnny felt a warmth spread through his chest, his friends were always so thoughtful: “Thank you, Yuta.” 

He decided to call Ten a little while after that, trying not to feel disappointed when it yet again went to voicemail. 

The rest of that day dragged on, Johnny constantly checking his phone and occasionally trying to get through to Ten again. 

At one point in the evening Dongyoung had a long phone call with his brother, he shut himself in his room for several hours, emerging with red eyes but a more genuine smile — feeling better once he had talked to his family. 

Yuta continued to fuss around them like a mother hen, checking in and making sure they were both feeling okay. Johnny couldn't help but feel guilty: he had brought this upon himself, and now he was burdening his roommates. 

He kept these thoughts to himself. 

***

The next day, not wanting to disappoint any more people, Johnny got up at a reasonable time and made his way into work. 

No one paid him much mind as he entered the shop, giving him brief hellos and asking if he was feeling better. Johnny had plastered on his most convincing smile, brushing off the topic and making his way towards the tills. 

Kiya didn't bat an eye when she saw him, acting to the outside as if he had never been off at all. “Johnny, would you mind helping me carry out a new box of vinyl. We had a large delivery this morning and I could do with your assistance.” 

Nodding, Johnny agreed to follow her. 

As soon as they were in the privacy of the storeroom, Kiya stopped dead in her tracks and turned around, pulling Johnny into a bone-crushing hug, “Are you okay?” She questioned, voice soft and full of concern, “Gem texted saying Ten was mad as hell and I just had a terrible feeling that something had happened. I couldn't get much out of him last night but when I called Yuta things began to make sense.” She pulled back slightly, forehead creased, “He said you weren't doing so well.” 

Johnny felt as if he could cry again, leaning forward for another hug and letting out a shuddering breath: “I'm fine,” he just about managed, sounding not at all fine, “Can you, is he. Can you tell me if Ten’s okay?” He knew Kiya didn't like sharing things about Ten without his permission but he had to at least try. 

“He will be, you both will be. I have complete faith that you’ll make it through this. I mean it's not the first time he’s got mad with someone over this exact conversation.” 

“Really?” 

“Yeah, the last person was Taeyong. They have a great relationship with their parents and couldn't understand why Ten wouldn't try reaching out. The two of them had a huge argument because of it, but after a few days of ignoring each other, even the two of them got over it, apologising and moving on.

He really likes you, Johnny. I can’t see him throwing away what you have at the first argument. Just wait for him.” 

Johnny felt a little reassured at her words, letting out a watery chuckle, “You always say that: give him time, wait for him.” He mumbled, forcing a tight smile and wiping his eyes. 

“Yeah I do, I guess what you need to decide is if he’s worth it?” 

Johnny didn't have to think at all before replying: “Yeah. Yeah, he's worth all the waiting.” 

Seeming calmer at his words, Kiya squeezed his shoulder and stepped away, “That's a real relief.” With that, she moved over to a shelf revealing several box loads of records: “Right, let's get on with this.” 

By the time Johnny had gotten home, he felt exhausted. It had been good to get out and go to work, the hours around the record store helping him take his mind off things for the most part, but now the tiredness from his restless sleep was quickly catching up with him. 

He was just finishing a pot noodle when his phone began to buzz. His eyes flicked up, landing on the familiar name that had appeared on his screen. 

Ten was calling him.

He stopped still, watching his phone ring and debating what to do. 

He let it buzz a couple more times before sighing to himself and picking it up: “Hello?” His voice cracked as he spoke. 

There was silence. 

“Hello?” Johnny tried again, feeling more and more desperate as he waited for a reply. 

All he could hear was the sound of cars and people chatting in the background. 

Still, no one spoke. 

Sighing to himself, Johnny accepted that Ten had accidentally pocket called him and went to hang up when: “Johnny…” The unmistaken sound of Ten’s voice filtered through the receiver.

As soon as he heard him, Johnny knew something was wrong. On the other end of the line, Ten let out a small sniffle and pulled in a shuddering breath. “Ten? Are you okay? What's wrong?” He instantly jumped into concern mode, standing up and gripping his phone with white knuckles.

“Johnny,” Ten’s voice broke, starting to cry, “I'm hurt, I think I’ve injured myself.” Johnny felt his heart stop. “I’m sorry, I know I’ve not been so great over the past few days but,” He choked on a sob, “please I need you.” He was full-on crying by this point, broken sounds reverberating through the phone. 

With adrenaline pumping through his system, Johnny started moving, slipping into his shoes and grabbing his jacket. “Ten it’s going to be okay. I’m on my way, can you tell me where you are?”

At the sound of panic in his voice, Dongyoung and Yuta both looked up, sharing a worried glance before going to grab their own shoes and coats. 

Over the line, Ten listed his location — He was just outside a subway station, on his way to Johnny’s place after his recent dance practice. Thankfully it's a place Johnny knows well, two stops away from his closest station. “Okay, I’m on my way. Keep talking to me, can you tell me what happened.” 

“I've spent the last three days practicing…” Ten admitted, voice shaking now, but sobs quieting down, “I know It was stupid,” Johnny could hear him well up again, “but I still did it. And then today, I had a fall during one of my jumps, landed pretty badly. Everyone—” He pulled in a shuddering breath, “Everyone told me to sit out for the rest of the session or go home. But I’m stubborn, so I ignored them.

As soon as practice finished I knew something was wrong. I thought if I could just get to you I’d be alright, but I collapsed just before getting to the station.” 

By this point, Johnny was running out the building, his roommates following close behind. His heart was pounding, but he didn't dare stop to calm himself down. Right now all he needed to do was to get to Ten as soon as humanly possible. 

They sped into the nearest station, jumping onto the correct line. Johnny was shaking, his phone, which had lost signal as soon as they entered the underground, still gripped tightly in his hand. 

He used this time to explain the situation to his friends, thanking them for coming with him. 

Two stops later, the train finally arrived. The three of them rushed off, taking the stairs two at a time and hurrying into the street. 

They spotted Ten quickly, He was hard to miss, curled in on himself with a small group of bystanders stopping to check in on him. One arm was cradled around one leg for warmth, while the other leg was stretched out awkwardly in front of him — mobile still pressed against his ear. 

Johnny didn't stop moving. Pushing through the crowd until he was kneeling directly in front of the smaller man. “Ten baby, I’m here it’s alright.” 

Looking up at the sound of this voice, relief flooded Ten’s face, before being quickly replaced with pain — fresh tears spilling onto his already stained cheeks. “Johnny,” his voice was hoarse and cracked slightly as he spoke. 

Johnny’s heart broke a little more seeing this beautiful man reduced to pain and distress. 

“Shh shh, it’s okay, I’m here, I’m not going anywhere.” He leant forward cradling his boyfriend in his arms and pressed a kiss against his forehead, tears of his own flooding his eyes.

“Is he alright?” One woman spoke up, “I saw him collapse but he wouldn't let me call a taxi for him or anything, kept saying he was waiting for someone, I’m guessing that was you.” 

Johnny ignored her, being more interested in wrapping Ten in his jacket and keeping him warm against the cold November evening. Thankfully Dongyoung and Yuta were there to answer for him. 

They cleared the space, thanking people for keeping an eye on Ten and telling them that they could take it from here. Eventually, the crowd left and they were able to hoist Ten up, supporting him and helping him clamber onto Johnny’s back. 

The next hours were spent in ER. 

Dongyoung texted Taeyong, asking them to bring a warm pair of clothes, and any documents Ten might need to present to the medical staff. 

When they arrived at the entrance of the hospital, Gem, Taeyong and Kiya were already waiting. Worry set firmly in place over their faces, their eyes flashing with panic when they caught sight of Ten. 

They didn't stop to talk, instead, all seven of them made their way in, getting in line at the desk.

“How can I help you?” The lady behind the desk asked, looking up and scanning over the large group of people. 

Johnny explained the situation as best as he could, helping Ten down from his shoulders and supporting him while he explained the specifics of his injury. 

The member of staff passed Ten a form and asked him to take a seat in the waiting room. “I'm sorry, but the rest of you will have to wait outside,” The group hesitated, sharing a look between each other — not wanting to leave their friend’s side. 

“Johnny, you stay with him, we’ll see you later okay?” Dongyoung was the first to speak, tugging gently at Yuta’s sleeve.

The idea of being left alone while he waited for Ten was terrifying. Johnny wished they could all stay — Ten (and him) needed all their support right now.

“I’ll stay too. As it is, I've got his spare clothes.” Johnny felt relieved when Gem spoke up, turning to thank her until her piercing gaze landed on him — making the words die in his mouth. 

The rest of the group agreed, saying goodbye quickly and walking away from them. Johnny didn't miss when Kiya lent to kiss her girlfriend, whispering a hushed: “Don’t be too harsh on him okay?” He wasn't close enough to catch Gem’s reply. 

The knot of anxiety that had formed in his stomach, grew larger. 

The remaining members of the group continued into the waiting room. Johnny placed Ten into one of the empty metal chairs, sitting down next to him and directing his attention towards his boyfriend. “Hey, how are you holding up?” He asked, voice nothing but a soft whisper. 

“Pretty shitty if I'm honest with you.” Ten replied, pulling Johnny’s jacket tighter around him, “Why are emergency rooms always freezing.” He complained, frowning his eyebrows in obvious discomfort, which was definitely more to do with his injury than the temperature. 

Noticing this, Johnny chanced a look at his leg, It had been pretty dark outside, and Johnny had been so set on getting Ten somewhere safe that he hadn't taken a proper look at his injury. 

When he saw it, he couldn't help but wince. Ten’s leg was badly swollen, his ankle, in particular, looking two sizes too big. 

“We have some warmer clothes, do you want some help getting into them?” 

Ten nodded, Johnny and Gem got to work. First, they slipped the jumper over his head (It was a few sizes too big, definitely one of Johnny’s that he’d left the last time he was over), then wrapping the coat back around him, before working on his legs. 

They had to remove Ten’s shoes to get the sweat pants on, starting with the uninjured foot before moving to the other. The two of them worked together, easing the shoe off his heel and removing it completely. Ten let out a hiss of pain, wincing and gripping Johnny’s shoulder. 

The next step was just as difficult — getting Ten into the trousers. He leant heavily against Johnny, a cry of pain slipping out of his mouth as they threaded his foot through the leg hole. “I'm sorry Ten, we’re almost there,” Gem spoke, frowning as they finally pulled the sweat pants up and sat Ten back down. 

Then it was time to wait. Gem busied herself with helping Ten fill out the medical form and Johnny decided to grab something for Ten to eat — wanting him to be able to keep his strengths up.

The two friends had been talking in angry whispers when Johnny returned. They stopped as soon as he approached, Ten sending one last look at Gem urging her not to say anything, before turning to Johnny. 

“Is everything alright?” Johnny asked, feeling as if he’d definitely just walked into a conversation about himself. Ten didn't answer him, instead, thanking him for the food and digging in. 

Gem just huffed out a breath and pulled out her phone — the forms having been complete while Johnny was away. 

It was another full hour later that Ten’s name was finally called. 

Johnny stood quickly, helping Ten to his feet and walking over to the nurse. She directed Ten into a room, smiling kindly at Johnny before turning him away, “I’m sorry, but only next of kin can come in, you’ll have to wait here.” 

Pressing his lips into a straight line, Johnny reluctantly agreed, giving Ten’s hand one last reassuring squeeze, and moving back to the seats. 

Ten seemed just as reluctant to let go as he was: “He’s my boyfriend, I don't mind him coming in with me, please.” He tried, sounding small and he stated his case to the nurse. 

“He’ll be here for you when you get out.” Was all she said in reply, closing the door behind them. 

A heavy silence seemed to fall over the room — neither Johnny or Gem saying a word to each other.

Then, they were waiting again. 

As time ticked on, Johnny grew steadily worried. He wasn't sure how long something like this would take to diagnose, but to him, the longer Ten was with the consultant, the worse things must be. 

It was around the 40-minute mark. That Johnny began to fidget, struggling to keep still. He bounced his leg, body shaking slightly as he routinely looked between his phone, and the wall clock, checking and then double-checking that the time was right. 

Watching this, Gem couldn’t help but feel frustration rise within her. Finally, she spoke up: “Johnny, constantly looking at the time isn't going to make it go faster.” She stated, turning to Johnny with a raised eyebrow. 

“I know.” He bit his lip, worrying it between his teeth. A pang of heavy guilt had settled in his stomach — a constant reminder that they wouldn’t be in this situation if it hadn’t been for him. He cursed himself even more now for being so thoughtless. 

Gem seemed to understand what he was thinking, letting out a sigh now and rubbing her hand across his shoulders, “You can’t blame yourself for this.” Her voice was softer as she spoke this time. 

“Can’t I?” 

“Johnny,” She sighed again, “Ten doesn’t blame you for this, his injury is on him.”

“But, you know that's not true. If I hadn't been so stupid,” He squeezed his eyes shut, “none of this would have happened. I’m sorry, this must be really frustrating.” Chancing a look in Gem’s direction, he expected to be met with the same sharp stare from before, but instead, a pair of soft, concerned eyes were looking back. 

“You're right, it is frustrating, and to be honest I'm mad with the both of you. I'm mad that Ten is so quick to react negatively to things, mad that you were dumb enough to say something like that in the first place. But what's done, is done, and we can’t change the fact that Ten’s got a dance injury. So, as I said before, don't blame yourself, just be there for him now.” 

She leant forward, squeezing Johnny’s hand. 

He relaxed into the touch, putting away his phone for the time being. 

***

Eventually, Ten was released. Helped back into the waiting room by the same nurse as before, a doctor walking by his side. 

As soon as they saw him, Gem and Johnny shot up out of their seats, making their way over to Ten as quickly as they could. The Doctor stuck out her hand as they approached, introducing herself and explaining the situation. “Chittaphon has a pulled ligament in his right calf and a sprained ankle. He’ll be fine and will be able to dance after an eight week period of rest. He should be able to bear weight after a couple of weeks, but I would advise that he doesn't push it.” She explained to the group, going over some of the diagnosis in more detail. 

It turned out Ten’s collapse was more to do with overexertion, rather than the injury itself.

She wrote him a doctor's note for work before handing him the prescription form and leading the three of them back over to the desk. 

“I recommend going to your local GP if the swelling doesn't go down in the next few days.” She finished, smiling kindly at him. 

Then, they were finally able to leave. 

The three of them grabbed a taxi and headed home — tired from the stress of the evening and just about ready to crash out. 

Ten had been quiet during the drive, cuddling into Johnny’s side with his eyes still closed and forehead frowned — his leg still giving him a lot of discomfort. 

They arrived at the apartment, and Johnny carried Ten up the flights of stairs, making sure not to unnecessarily jostle him on the way. Taeyong and Kiya were extremely pleased to see them, eager to know what had happened. Ten explained his injury quickly, but excused himself to bed soon after, wanting nothing more than to go to sleep. 

Not wanting to leave him just yet, Johnny helped him, dressing him in something more comfortable and kneeling next to the bed once, he’d slipped in. “How are you feeling?” 

“Really tired.” 

“Yeah, I think that's understandable, I’ll let you get some sleep.” He stated, pressing a kiss against Ten’s temple before standing up. 

However, as he went to pull away, he was stopped by a hand on his sleeve: “Please stay.” Ten spoke, voice a small, barely-there whisper, “Please.” He repeated, now with an edge of desperation. 

Johnny was unable to say no to that, leaning back down to press a kiss against his lips this time, before stripping out of his jeans and crawling in. 

They lay facing each other, foreheads touching arms embracing one another. Johnny curled his hand around Ten’s waist, gently pulling him closer. It didn't take long for the two of them to be drifting off. 

***

“I’m sorry,” 

It was around 4 pm the next day.

Johnny and Ten were curled up in bed listening to the distant sound of rain hitting against the window. It was colder today, something made more obvious by the draft that seemed to blow through the entirety of the apartment. 

They had had a lazy morning in bed, only getting up to make sure Ten had taken some painkillers before snuggling back in. 

Kiya had given Johnny the day off, telling him that he was needed more here than at the shop anyway. Ten, had called his own work to explain the situation.

The swelling in his leg was already beginning to go down, leaving in its place an angry bruise that spread sickly green and purple hues over his skin — evidence of the fall making itself noticeable. 

Ten's roommates had cleared out in the morning, and the two of them had been left behind. 

By this point, they had been quiet for some time — waiting for the pain medication from lunch to fully kicked in. 

Johnny decided that now was as good a time as any to talk about the argument. 

“I’m sorry, for saying all that stupid stuff the other day. I was wrong, I should have thought more before opening my mouth, I should have been more supportive.” He finally whispered into the room, letting out all the worries that had been circling his head, over the past few days. 

For a moment he was unsure if Ten had heard him, his boyfriend had his eyes closed, hands linked with Johnny’s, duvet cover wrapped around him.

If it wasn’t for the way Ten squeezed his hand, Johnny would have thought he was asleep. “Thank you, for apologising. I’m sorry too. Gem’s right, I overreacted, instead of storming out, maybe I should have just talked about it.” 

He took a deep breath, as if readying himself, “You see, the reason I get so defensive is, to tell you the truth, I’m scared. I’m completely terrified of reaching out to my family again. Not because of them rejecting me, no, I love the person I’ve become. Their opinions have never changed that. Of course, I don’t want their negativity in my life but I’m also... I’m also scared of the positive...

What if they want to make things better, what if they want me to come home? I would feel so torn because on the one hand, why should I leave behind my life in New York for them. But on the other, who am I to turn down a chance to fix things?” 

The more he talked, the more Johnny understood, “And I added pressure to that, god, Ten, I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry for being inconsiderate.” 

“Please, it’s okay now, I shouldn’t have turned my anger on you the way I did. The things I said, I wanted them to hurt and, and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about what you said.” 

His eyes were open now, gazing at Johnny with concern: “What did you mean,” he gently ran a hand through Johnny’s hair, “what did you mean by not wanting to continue?” 

Johnny knew the subject was bound to come up, it had to really, needed to be out in the open. 

“I meant that I wanted to give up. Meant that I wanted to throw away everything I had achieved in life.” He sighed, “If I hadn’t left, it wouldn’t have been long before I was addicted to much more than just nicotine, who knows what would’ve happened after that.” He ended the statement with a dry chuckle trying to lighten the situation. He didn’t want to dwell on the past right now. 

"I'm so happy you didn't give up." Ten whispered. After that, he changed the subject, instead, going onto something a little lighter: “Talking about nicotine cravings, you must be gasping by now. You're welcome to have a smoke, I won't mind this time.” 

Johnny’s chuckle was more genuine this time, he picked up his jeans from the floor, rooting through the pockets before pulling out half a packet of gum. “You know what, I think this will do.” 

“Is that what I think it is?”

Johnny nodded, a small smile appearing on his face. 

To say Ten was shocked would be an understatement. He was completely taken aback, smiling wide at his boyfriend and pushing forward to place kiss after kiss against his face. “You’re quitting? I’m so proud of you, when did you make this decision.” 

Johnny’s face was pink when he moved away. “Um, I quit just after our argument. Smoking had always been a bit of emotional support for me — or emotional suppressor. It kept me calm, helped me tune out the bad stuff, gave me an excuse. But on that day, it did nothing. And I realised, I couldn’t continue wrecking my body like that.” 

Ten was still smiling as he spoke. Johnny, absentmindedly thought about how this, was the most genuine smile he had seen from his boyfriend since the fight. He never wanted to lose it again. 

“So how are you holding up? How’s  _ Yuta _ holding up? Oh my god, I can’t wait for your clothes to stop smelling of smoke.” Ten rambled obviously excited by what Johnny had said. 

Johnny just chuckled, trying to keep up with all his questions. 

They went back and forth like this for a while, the tension from the past few days ebbing away until they were more or less back to normal. 

Dongyoung and Yuta stopped by after dance, anxious to see their friend and make sure things were alright. 

It had been a nice evening, Ten complaining loudly about not being able to dance for the next eight weeks, and the rest of the group sympathising. 

“The only way you’re going to get better is if you rest Ten,” Taeyong had stated, “Gem and I have spoken to the company, they want you to be completely back to health before you return to dance.”

Knowing they were right, Ten had grumbled but agreed, promising not to overwork himself.

It was gonna be a long eight weeks. But thankfully, Ten had the support of his best friends and his boyfriend to help get him through it. 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry!! Less angst from here on out.


	13. Happy Holidays

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another short and sweet chapter to make up for the last two angsty ones
> 
> Enjoy!!

The next winter months were hard. 

Living in cheap accommodation was not enjoyable as the cold closed in. Something Johnny found out first hand when, on one particularly stormy night, he was woken to water practically pouring in through his bedroom window. 

His other roommates weren't faring much better, damp creeping in and cold lingering even with the heating turned all the way up. 

They had complained to Stan, knowing full well that their pleas had fallen on deaf ears. This kind of job was expensive, something that cheap rent wasn't going to afford. “I'm sorry kids,” He had shrugged, positioning a bucket under a leak in his own apartment, “This isn't something I can afford, not without drastically raising the rent.” 

Ten and his friends were also suffering, although their apartment was leak-free, the bigger rooms meant that drafts affected them badly.

It began to snow in early December, keeping both groups blocked in for a couple of days, surviving off ready meals and wrapping up in as many layers as possible. 

As soon as the weather had cleared a bit, they had all returned to work — even Ten, much to Johnny’s concern. 

The city was cold, and the streets icy, yet New York still trudged on. 

Coming up to Christmas, things were about to get busy again, they needed everyone manning the storefronts. 

The busy work period served as a good distraction for some, Ten feeling the boredom of being stuck indoors start to get to him, and Dongyoung refusing to audition, still fragile from his last rejection. Those two, in particular, had launched themselves into the new schedule — looking for anything to keep them busy. 

Even with the winter showers, the whole group had managed to make it to Yuta’s performance, cheering him on in the front row, in the same way, that they had done with the dancers back in the summer. 

Then before they knew it, Christmas had rolled around. 

Although they couldn't quite justify spending that much money on the celebration, the group still went all out. 

“Merry Christmas!” Ten cried the moment Johnny and his friends stepped through the door. They had decided to camp out in Ten’s apartment for the next few days, the marginally warmer and dryer of the two. 

Johnny reached out, pulling the younger into a tight hug and mumbling a reply — “Merry Christmas,” He spoke, pressing his cold face against Ten’s warm cheek.

“Gahh, you’re freezing.” Ten complained, rubbing his hands over Johnny’s arms to try and generate some heat. “Get your ass in and in front of the heater, we have blankets and hot drinks.” The group complied, hanging their coats by the doorway, and slipping out of their winter boots before making their way into the warmth of the living room. 

From where they entered, Johnny could see Taeyong warming Christmas punch in the kitchen, and Gem and Kiya curled up on the couch wearing hideous, matching, Christmas jumpers. 

“Wow, you two look festive.” Johnny chided, sinking into the nearest chair and instantly getting a lapful of Ten. 

“Har har, thanks Johnny, but we think they're cute.” Kiya sent him a half-assed glare, throwing an arm around her girlfriend and snuggling closer. 

Taeyong arrived then, serving them all a mug of hot punch and settling down with their own drink. 

The group had decided not to do presents this year. Money was tight and they all needed to afford rent before the year was up. Instead, they each brought or prepared some food, meaning that they could have a real Christmas feast without being stuck in the kitchen for hours. 

Overall, the day was a weird mix — different traditions coming together to create a strange concoction of Christmas celebrations. 

The apartment was decorated with a small plastic tree, a string of fairy lights and a tone of homemade paper chains — crisscrossing the ceiling and draped over furniture. 

The TV seemed to be permanently on, creating extra background chatter in the already noisy room. 

Together, the group of seven talked, laughed, drank and ate. 

Ten clung to Johnny’s side for the majority of the day, only letting go to get more food or grab an extra blanket. He loved Christmas, it was something his family hardly celebrated when he was young, so since moving to America, he had made an effort to go all out each year, even if money was tough. 

Johnny couldn't complain, kinda liking the way Ten became extra clingy, it gave him a chance to be super soppy back. 

He had texted his family that morning, wishing them a happy holiday and apologising for not having sent anything over. They chatted for a while, reminiscing over past Christmases, talking about what they were up to this time.

Towards the end, Johnny’s mom had admitted she missed him. A jolt of homesickness went through his system — the first time he had felt this way since arriving. He didn't like it. 

Thankfully, the warmth of his boyfriend sitting cuddled in his lap was enough to keep him in the present.

Ten seemed to understand what he was feeling, noticing a dip in his mood. Squeezing his hand, he moved to pull him to his feet, “Come with me.” He whispered, dragging him over to the archway that led into the kitchen. 

They stopped. Johnny quirked an eyebrow, gaze trailing up and landing on a leafy plant that had been attached to the door frame, “Mistletoe?” He chuckled, a warmth spreading through his chest as he looked at his boyfriend. Ten nodded, biting his lip, eyes flicking down to Johnny’s mouth, “Well, come here.” Johnny whispered back, a slight smirk in his voice. 

With that, Ten wrapped his slender arms around Johnny’s neck, pushing up on his toes to meet him in a deep kiss. 

Johnny’s own arms made their way down — trailing over his sides, before landing on his hips. 

The kiss was slow and warm, comforting and overwhelming at the same time. Their mouths moved together, the taste of sweet punch lingering against their lips: exactly what Johnny needed to get him through the day. 

Christmas had been bittersweet for him, ever since his parents had divorced. As their only child, he felt torn between who he should spend his time with. Trapped between wanting to stay at home with his mom and feeling like he was disappointing his dad if he didn't go over. It had been hard. 

However now, for the first time in eight years, he didn't have to make that choice — knowing that he didn't need to be home — torn between his mom and dad, and also knowing that in some ways, he was home, home with the family he had found for himself. 

The kiss ended, when someone cleared their throat to the side of them. Dongyoung was standing by the archway, empty plate in hand and a sheepish smile on his face. “Sorry guys.” he apologised, “Do you mind if I could just get past, I was kind of hoping to grab some more food…” 

The couple laughed, stepping aside and letting their friend through — Ten leapt forward as Dongyoung passed beside them, placing a quick kiss against his cheek and laughing loudly as he squeaked in surprise. “I didn't want you to feel left out!” He explained to Dongyoung who was batting him away, laughing loudly himself. 

He went back to Johnny’s side after that, leaning in for another kiss and smiling brightly at him when they pulled apart. 

Johnny’s chest was full, so full he felt as if he could explode, not being able to stop the smile of his own that spread across his face, or the words that toppled out of his mouth: “I love you Ten.” He murmured, running a hand through his boyfriend's hair. 

In front of him, Ten stilled, eyes growing wide. 

His expression made Johnny suck in a sharp breath, finally realising what he had just said. He opened his mouth, apologies on the tip of his tongue — but Ten halted him. Stopped him with the soft press of lips against his, hands tangling through his hair and body surging forward to meet him. 

When Ten pulled away, a blinding smile stretched across his face. “Say that again.” He all but begged, voice quiet.

“I, I love you.” Johnny almost stuttered over the words this time, nerves catching his tongue and Ten’s stare making it hard to think clearly. “I love you, Ten.”

Ten’s breath hitched, happiness filling his entire being: “God, I love you too Johnny, I really, really love you.”

Johnny couldn't quite believe the words that had just left Ten’s mouth. Soft confessions shared between them. 

Overwhelmed with emotion, he pulled him in for a hug, pressing him close to his chest and burying his face in the crook of Ten’s neck. 

The warmth in his chest was expanding, spilling into the rest of his body and lighting him on fire, he let out a shaky breath, “Merry Christmas baby.” 

This was the best gift he could have asked for. 

  
  



	14. A Visitor

New Years celebrations flashed by and before they all knew it, January was upon them. 

After a check-up at the GPs, Ten had been given some exercises to do and told that he could go back to dance. 

However, much to his dismay, his company had other ideas, signing him off for another month just to make sure he was completely healed.

Johnny wasn’t complaining, as this meant lazy lie ins with Ten, wrapped in the comfort of one of their beds. He knew that as soon as Ten was given the all-clear form dance, he would be doing whatever it took to catch up with the others — and, although he was well and truly prepared to support him through this, he was going to make the most of their downtime while he still could. Especially now that Ten’s leg was no longer a worry.

Today, Ten was particularly restless. 

It was mid-January, the weather was still somewhat crap, and a cold draft could still be felt creeping through Johnny’s bedroom. 

Him and Ten had been wrapped up in his covers, sharing kisses on what would be one of their only joint days off for the next few weeks.

It was quiet, it was peaceful, and as always, they were the only two home…

Ten had his mind set on what he wanted to do today, making it even more obvious when he hooked a leg over Johnny, straddling his hips and leaning down over his boyfriend to deepen the kiss. 

“Ten,” Johnny whined, running his hands over Ten’s bare legs, stopping only when he reached the material of his boxers. 

“Hey baby,” Ten whispered, pressing soft kisses against his jaw now and rocking slightly where he was sat, “How about we have some fun?”

“God yes,” Johnny breathed back.

They sat up, Ten’s lips finding their way back to his, kissing him hard, and pulling out a low groan. His hands went to Johnny’s t-shirt, tugging it over his head and chucking it to the floor. 

Next, he ran his hands over Johnny’s chest, smoothing them over the soft skin and making his boyfriend shiver at the contact. 

They were just about to discard the jumper Ten was wearing when they were interrupted by the familiar buzz of the doorbell. 

“I wonder who that is?” Ten hummed, halting their movement. The buzzer sounded again, “Did you order anything?”

“No, I haven't ordered anything.” Johnny assured, a slight impatience in his voice, as he moved to press open-mouthed kisses against Ten’s neck: “I'm sure it nothing import—”

_ Buzzz _

He was cut off as the buzzer buzzed, again. 

“Well, whoever’s at the door obviously disagrees.” Ten sounded slightly amused as he clambered off Johnny’s lap and headed out of the bedroom, “Look, I’ll go check out who it is, and by the time I get back up, I expect you to be naked. How does that sound?” He said coyly, leaning teasingly against the door frame and blowing Johnny a kiss. 

He left dressed in only his boxers and one of Johnny’s hoodies. The material hung loosely against his body and ended mid-thigh, Johnny watched him walk away, distracted by the sway of his hips. 

After that, he wasted no time, pulling his bedroom door closed and stripping.

He hopped back onto his bed and settled in to wait. 

Time ticked on, a couple of minutes passed with no sign of Ten.

Johnny was just starting to get fidgety, feeling rather exposed in his current state, when the telltale sound of the front door opening could be heard, “Johnny,” Ten called, knocking on his door. 

“You can come in, baby.” Johnny hummed back, pleased that whatever was at the door hadn't taken _ too _ long. 

However, instead of entering, Ten spoke up again: “Actually Johnny, someone’s here to see you. You should probably get some clothes on, oh and would you mind grabbing me a pair of sweatpants?” 

That wasn't what he was expecting.

With a new found panic in his system, Johnny rushed to get dressed. 

He racked his brain for who it might be — mind quickly drawing a blank. But from the urgency in Ten’s voice, he could tell it was important. 

He jumped into a pair of jeans, grabbing his t-shirt from the floor and haphazardly tucked it in. Combing a hand through his hair, he attempted to flatten the tufts that had formed and readied himself for whoever was on the other side. 

Grabbing a pair of sweats for Ten, he exited the room. 

Scanning the living area, his eyes instantly fell on Ten. His boyfriend was leaning against the kitchen counter, subtly covering his legs with a pillow. 

Noticing the confusion on Johnny’s face, he sent a reassuring smile and nodded in the direction of the sofa.

That's when he saw him. Sitting wide-eyed and obviously uncomfortable, was his kid brother. 

Mark was perched on the end of the armchair, his whole body stiff, eyes refusing to meet Johnny’s. “Mark? What, what are you doing here?” Johnny questioned, handing the pants to Ten before walking over to sit on the coffee table. 

“Isn’t it obvious, I came to see you.” Johnny blinked dumbly at him, Mark just sighed. “It’s been almost a year since you left, and we've only spoken like three times… This was the only address you gave us, so I thought, as you didn't have any plans to come home, I’d come to you…” 

Johnny was shocked and somewhat confused. Surely there had to be more to this story? Something Mark wasn't sharing? “You should have texted.” He tried to keep his voice level as he spoke, not wanting to snap at his brother, “I could have been out, I could have moved… you might not have found me.” He made that last bit softer, trying to convey his concern. 

“And what? Have you tell me to stay away, or something? I don't think so…” 

“You don't honestly think I’d send you home right? I'm happy to see you man”

Mark just shrugged. 

There was another beat of silence before he spoke up again, “I only came to tell you that we’re moving…” 

There it was, the statement he had been hiding. 

“Moving? Where?” 

“Back to Vancouver… Dad got a job with his old firm, so we’re moving sometime in the spring. The house is already on the market and it's quite popular due to the location… shouldn't be too long before it’s sold.” 

Johnny didn't know how to react. He had lived in that house his entire life, lived in Chicago, grew up there, studied there. It may not be his favourite place, but it had shaped his entire youth. “I don't know what to say.” He eventually managed.

“Neither do I. I just felt you should hear about it in person, not just over the phone like your mom was planning.”

Noticing Johnny’s distress, a now fully clothed Ten made his way over — sitting himself down next to his boyfriend and snaking his arms around his middle. He placed a kiss against his shoulder before resting his chin there, eyes following Mark’s reaction. Thankfully, what he saw was no hate, no judgment — more curiosity…

“Look,” Mark continued, “I don't want to leave either. I mean it was bad enough moving from Canada when I was young. But I have my friends now, people I care about, a school I somewhat like, and that's all going to be taken away from me…” He frowned at the floor, a swell of emotions washing over him. “Anyway, I'm sorry about disturbing you guys today. I’ll grab the next bus home. If you want anything from your room John, just let me know, I’ll get it sent over.” 

Seeing him stand, Johnny jumped in: “No wait, Mark! You don't have to leave so quickly, have you got a return ticket booked already?” The younger nodded, “When’s it for?” 

“Monday evening…” He mumbled. 

“That's three days away, look how about you stay here? You can have my room and Ten and I can show you around for the weekend.”

Mark looked unsure, eyes flitting from one person to the other. Gaze circling the room, before stopping back on his brother, “Would that be okay?” 

Johnny physically relaxed, sharing a brief look with Ten before turning a blinding smile on the kid in front of him, “Yeah, of course it’s okay!” He reached forward, pulling the younger into an awkward hug and ruffling his hair: “I missed you bro” 

***

“Hi, guys we’re home. Just thought I’d let you know, in case you were having sex on the couch, again…” Yuta called as he opened the door. He caught sight of the people in the room, stopping dead in his tracks and making Dongyoung collide with his back, “Shit, whose child did you steal?” 

The two roommates had walked in from their morning shifts to find Johnny, Ten and Mark chatting at the table. Or rather they had been chatting, until Yuta had made his, highly, inappropriate entrance and disturbed the casual, totally normal, conversation they were having. 

Ten was face-palming, and Johnny had turned bright red — standing and addressing the newcomers: “Yuta, Dongyoung, this is my brother Mark.” 

_ That made more sense. _

By this point, Dongyoung had pushed his way past Yuta and was on his way to introduce himself properly, “Mark, of course. I'm sorry we didn't recognise you earlier. Johnny never mentioned anything about you visiting.” He flashed a confused smile at the three people at the table, sticking out his hand and meeting Mark for a handshake. 

“Mark!” Yuta cried, “Wow, you look so different from the pictures Johnny showed us.” Yuta walked over, flashing a bright smile and pulling the slightly bewildered kid into a hug. 

“To be fair, you look pretty different from the photograph Johnny sent us…” Mark pointed out. 

It was true: Yuta had dyed his hair copper coloured over winter; fancying a change from blond, Dongyoung’s hair had gotten longer, Ten was once more a brunet and Johnny had actually gotten his cut. Plus, the tan they had developed over the summer months had been long lost to the winter weather. 

Yuta was right too: the Mark in Johnny’s photographs had been all scrawny and kid-like, this was no longer the case. He had obviously done some growing up of his own, over the summer as well. 

The group chatted for a bit, Mark explaining why he was in New York, and slowly but surely becoming more comfortable around Johnny’s friends. 

“Gem just texted.” Ten stated at some point during their conversation, “She says they're all going to be free this evening and that we should go and grab dinner somewhere… What do you think?” Ten directed that last statement towards Mark, ignoring the way Yuta and Dongyoung quickly, and eagerly agreed. 

“Who’s going?” The younger asked, trying not to show how the prospects of meeting even more people was kind of terrifying. 

“My roommates: Taeyong and Gem, and Gem’s Girlfriend Kiya,” Ten explained, smiling kindly at Mark. 

“They're all really great, I think you’d like them.” Johnny coxed. It had been a while since they had all been able to meet up like this — he wouldn't force Mark if he really didn't want to go, but he couldn't deny it would be a shame to miss out.

“Yeah alright,” Mark agreed, “it would be nice to meet them all.” 

Ten quickly texted them back, and the group set off — heading directly for their favourite pizza place (it had become somewhat of a regular meeting point, since the summer).

***

They arrived in no time and made themselves comfortable while they waited for the rest to turn up. 

“Hey guys… Oh my god, are you Mark?” Taeyong had been the first to enter, noticing the new face instantly and quickly working out who it was. 

Mark let out an awkward chuckle, “Yeah that's me.” He confirmed, waving at the three people who just arrived. 

Gem and Kiya were less intense while introducing themselves, sticking with a friendly wave and a kind smile. 

They chatted comfortably while they ate, and Johnny was pleased to see Mark taking well to his friends, feeling a swell of pride as he watched them all interact. 

“So Mark, how old are you?” Kiya asked. 

“Uhh, I turn 18 this summer.” 

“So you’re 17…” Gem confirmed, amused at the roundabout answer the teenager had given. 

“Are you finishing high school this year?” Kiya continued. 

“Yeah I am but…” Mark let out a dejected sigh, “We’re moving to Canada before the summer begins, so although I will have finished all my exams, I’ll miss out on the last summer  _ ever  _ with my friends.” He turned his gaze downwards, suddenly incredibly interested in the table.

“I’m sorry to hear that man,” Taeyong sympathised, “but it's okay, because you’ll be going to college after that, so things will change again anyway.” 

There was silence, Mark looked a bit awkward at the statement, sliding a pizza crust around his plate, “Yeah, true… Although, I haven't actually applied to any colleges yet…” 

“You haven’t?” Johnny was slightly confused by what his brother had just said. When he was finishing high school, his mom and stepdad had piled on the pressure — especially about what college he was going to enrol in.

He had spent all his free time researching the best courses and highest-ranking colleges. It hadn't been something he really wanted to do, but it had made his parents happy — even if he had just settled for staying in Chicago in the end.

The fact that it was mid-January and Mark hadn't even started looking really surprised him. 

“No, I…” He seemed to be looking for the right words, “I don't know what I want to study yet and my dad, he said he wouldn't pressure me because… he didn't want me to make the same mistakes…” Mark never did have a great way with words.

Ten sucked in a breath, wincing slightly at what the younger said, and placed a reassuring hand against Johnny’s thigh. 

The other five watched the situation unfold, they knew about Johnny’s college life, understood that it was something he was ashamed about. Mark’s words were obviously meant to be innocent, but from the expression of shock on Johnny’s face, they had hurt quite a bit. 

“Right,” Johnny let out a bitter laugh, “because I was such a fuck up.”

Mark seemed shocked by his statement, widening his eyes when he realised how his own words had sounded, “No I didn't mean—”

“Nah, it makes sense. You know, pile all the pressure on the oldest, keep pushing until he breaks, wait until he’s become a disappointment and then  _ finally  _ realise that maybe,  _ just maybe _ that's not the best way to treat your son.” He knew this wasn't Mark’s fault, knew it wasn't him he should be taking it out on. But right now he couldn't help it. 

Deep down he was happy for him, relieved even, that Mark wouldn't struggle in the way he did, but it still hurt, still stung that they hadn't done the same for him. 

“This is exactly why I should have gone home today,” Mark grumbled, “from the times we’ve talked, I thought you had gotten over this, I can see you haven't really changed that much.” 

_ He’s just a kid, kids say stupid things. _ Johnny repeated that mantra in his head, reminding himself that they’d had this argument before — Mark knew exactly how to press his buttons, and he knew exactly what to say to make him mad. They were brothers, after all. 

“I bet you still smoke…” 

“Actually, he doesn’t.” Ten cut in. He hadn't wanted to get involved with this argument, but as Johnny was refusing to defend himself, settling on glaring from across the table, he decided he needed to step in. “Yeah, he quit last year. I mean, I won't lie, it took months of nagging,” He joked, trying to lighten the mood somewhat, “but he got there eventually.” 

Ten pressed a kiss against Johnny’s jaw, feeling pleased with himself when he managed to pull a smile onto his face. 

“Oh, really?” Mark sounded surprised, the irritation from before instantly washing away, “Your mom would be really pleased to hear that.” 

The mood somewhat evened out after that. However, Ten kept a firm hold on Johnny’s hand, anchoring and comforting him. 

“Hmm, you know what? I think you’d get along well with Hyuck…” Kiya stated. 

“Oh yeah, I think you’re onto something there.” Dongyoung agreed. 

Seeming to consider this for a second, Yuta spoke up: “Hyuck as in Donghyuck, from dance?”

“Yeah,” Taeyong confirmed, “he’s a year younger than you Mark, from what I remember, but he’s a total free spirit… great kid, you two would probably get along well.” 

“Pppff, I don’t want to hang out with some  _ kid _ .” 

Lee Donghyuck wasn’t just some kid. He was an incredibly talented dancer, loud, flamboyant, a pain in the ass (especially towards Ten and Dongyoung). He was crazy, and more importantly, he would eat Mark alive… 

“You should come along with us tomorrow, we've got a long session again, it would be fun — help you see some of the local area and allow you to make friends,” Dongyoung suggested. 

“I don’t know, dance isn't really my thing…” 

“Well, sure, but Johnny doesn't dance either, and he regularly sits in on practice — you could just help him take photos or something. Plus, I've been wanting to visit for a while now, they might let me dance for a bit.” Ten reasoned, deciding that going tomorrow was the best plan of action. 

Mark reluctantly agreed. 

They left after that, splitting off into their two groups and heading back to their corresponding apartments. 

Ten had the early shift the next day so wouldn’t be able to stay over, instead, he held on to Johnny's hand, waiting for some space to appear between them and the others before talking: “Try not to kill him yeah?” He said, somewhat jokily. Johnny huffed out a laugh. “Look I know this is hard, but he almost bolted this morning when I opened the door, so he’s probably still incredibly overwhelmed by everything.”

“Yeah, you’re right.” Johnny sighed, an exhausted feeling washing over him, “I’ll be nice I promise.” 

Ten chuckled, “I know you will.” He leant up on his toes, pulling Johnny in for a slow kiss. It was warm and comforting, Johnny wished he could just stay like that all night. 

But unfortunately, they couldn’t. Ten broke the kiss first, pulling back with a small smile on his face, “I’ll see you tomorrow yeah?” 

“Yeah, see you tomorrow, love you.” He added at the end, just because he could. 

“I love you too.” 

***

As promised, the next day, Johnny, Dongyoung and Yuta dragged Mark to dance. What should have been easy, ended up being a surprisingly difficult task. 

The rest of the previous days evening had been fine, albeit somewhat uneventful. 

Johnny had set up his room for mark, telling him to make himself comfortable, before moving the things he needed to the living room — his bedroom for the next few days. 

Mark had been quiet, looking around the apartment and making himself at home. 

Just before he had gone to bed, He had pulled Johnny aside, “I’m sorry,” he began, “for judging you so harshly, I didn’t mean what I said this evening, you have changed, in a good way.” He finished when Johnny raised an eyebrow at him.

“Thanks, man… Now get some sleep, we’ve got an early start tomorrow, and you’re probably exhausted from the journey.” 

Apparently, Mark had been tired, as mid-morning rolled around, and there was still no sign of the teen. 

In the end, Johnny had got him up and at it, shovelling some food into his face and dragging him out the door — after all, they didn't want to be  _ too _ late. 

When they arrived at the warehouse, Ten was already inside stretching and dressed in his dance gear. 

As if by instinct, Johnny raised the camera to his face (his DSLR this time), and snapped a shot. 

The familiar sound made Ten turn around and stop what he was doing. However, unlike the first time, the glare on Ten’s face was replaced with a grin, and he bounded over to see them. “Are you always going to do that?” He questioned, throwing his arms around Johnny’s neck and biting his lip slightly to suppress a laugh. 

“I think you already know the answer to that…” Johnny replied nonchalantly, arms circling his waist and pulling him closer. 

The kiss they shared was interrupted by Yuta: “Guys!” He cried out, “Stop there are kids present.” He meant it as a joke, but when the couple pulled apart, Johnny did notice Mark shuffling his feet awkwardly. 

Thankfully just then, another kid made their way over. “Who’s the fresh meat?” He asked in Korean, aiming his question toward Dongyoung, who he knew would understand him. 

Johnny, Ten and Yuta all let out a snort, while Mark’s eyes became large with shock: “Hey. I can understand what you're saying.” He complained, folding his arms defensively. 

The newcomer didn't seem to care, instead, waving one of his hands and introducing himself: “Right, well I'm Hyuck, who are you?” 

“I’m Mark, Johnny’s brother.” 

“Okay, Johnny’s brother, come with me, I’ll teach you how to warm up.” 

With that, the four friends watched as Mark was dragged into the group, suppressing their laughter at the helpless look he sent them. 

Dongyoung, Yuta and Ten soon joined the group, leaving Johnny to chill in the seated area and snap some test shots. 

It was about an hour later when Mark finally escaped, dragging his body over to the seats and practically collapsing in them. “Dance. Is. So. Hard.” He panted out, chugging a bottle of water and tipping his head back in exhaustion. 

“Yeah, you can say that again.” Johnny chuckled, “What do you think of Hyuck?” 

“He’s…” Mark racked his brain, intense, crazy, exhausting… amazing… In the end, he settled with: “He’s really something.” Across the room, the brothers watched as Hyuck chucked himself at Dongyoung, grabbing onto his back and speaking far too loudly into his ear. Mark let out a chuckle, a small blush rising on his face before he cleared his throat. 

Johnny filed that information away for another day. 

Just then, his attention was grabbed by someone else. Ten was in the middle of the dance floor, body moving in time with the music in his head — flowing, spinning, twisting as he went over the last dance routine he had learnt, before his injury. 

Noticing his eye wonder, Mark too looked over in the direction Johnny was staring. He watched Ten dance for a moment, before turning to Johnny and noticing the warm look that had appeared on his face. 

“So Ten, Huh?” He spoke, making Johnny jump slightly when he realised he had been staring for the past few minutes. 

“Yeah, Ten.” 

“I hadn't realised you were—” 

“Not straight… yeah, I never really got around to telling anyone.” 

“How long have you known?” Mark asked tentatively. 

“Gosh, I don’t know. For years I guess, maybe even for as long as I've known you.” 

“Really… But you had a girlfriend in high school?” 

“Yeah and I've been with both men and women since then.” Johnny shrugged, “Although,” He added after a bit of thought, “I think this is the first time I've properly been in love.” 

“Yeah? Well, I'm happy for you man!” 

“Thanks... Thanks, Mark.”

***

Johnny had to go to work that evening, and much to his surprise, Mark had asked to join him. 

“Hey Kiya, Mark was wondering if he could chill in the shop this evening, would that be alright?” Johnny asked upon entering. 

“Sure thing, I don't see why it can’t be 'take your kid brother to work day.'” She joked, ruffling Mark’s hair, before setting Johnny on his first task. 

“This place is so cool.” Mark gushed. He had been following Johnny around like a lost puppy while he stacked shelves, picking up different records and looking around with wide eyes. 

“Yeah, it’s pretty great.” Johnny agreed, “What type of music do you listen to at the moment?” 

“Oh, I don't know all sorts, I guess.” He shrugged, flicking through a new stack and stopping suddenly, “Hey didn't your mom used to have this?” He questioned, picking up a record and flashing it in Johnny’s direction. “This was always my favourite when I was young, do you know why she got rid of it.” 

Johnny glanced over, knowing straight away what record Mark was talking about, and exactly why his mom refused to keep hold of it. “Yeah, it was one of my favourites too… But it was my dad’s record collection, so I guess she sent them over to him.” 

“Oh…” The two of them had never really talked about their other parents. From what Johnny knew, Mark had a somewhat good relationship with his mom still, going over to stay with her during holidays. Johnny, on the other hand, had fallen out of touch with his dad while at college. They still texted, on occasion, and Johnny had still received a card on his birthday — but overall their relationship had broken down. 

He quickly changed the topic, “How about I show you some of my favourite records? Does mom still have the record player? Maybe it's time for you to start your own collection.” 

The rest of his shift was spent like that. He stacked shelves while pointing out good albums. 

Mark would look them up on his phone playing them and saving the ones he liked. 

It was fun, chatting, sharing his interests with his brother — it had been years since they’d done something like this. 

“Why don’t you choose a record and I’ll buy it for you?” Johnny suggested when he got to the end of his workday. He was feeling particularly generous — wanting to get something nice for Mark. 

“Really? Would that be alright?” 

“I wouldn't have suggested it if it wasn’t.” Johnny chuckled. 

“Okay, I know exactly what I want, one-second!” He rushed off through the shop, checking through the shelves before finding the record he wanted. 

As he placed it down beside the till, Johnny was surprised to see the same record from his dad’s collection sitting in front of him. “You really want this one?” He questioned. 

“Yeah,” Mark confirmed, “because it’s one of our favourites.”

That night, the two of them finally talked things out: they talked about their parent's divorce; how it’s affected them, how they felt when they got remarried, what they thought when they found out they had a brother, moving in as a family, Johnny’s time at college.

“I just,” Johnny sighed, it was 2:30am at this point and he was completely awake. He and Mark were both sat on his bed — the dim light of his lamp shrouding them in orange, “all my life, I felt as if I never had a choice in anything. My dad left — my opinion didn’t matter. Mom wanted to get married — I didn’t get a say. I’m suddenly an older brother — I have to deal with it. It was hard because I wanted you to have someone to look up to. But I was unhappy because I no longer had a safe space. College was my first chance to get away from all of that and it made me go a little crazy, I guess. But that’s why I’m in New York... I wanted to prove to myself that I could do something, completely in my control for once.” 

Mark had heard him out, listening with no judgment as Johnny explained himself. It had felt good to share these things, with the only other person who would understand exactly what he meant.

“I was scared too, terrified even. For so long it had just been me and my dad. I got to see mom on the weekends which was nice, but I was mostly happy spending my time with him. And then suddenly we were joining another family. And I’d never met you guys before. It’s probably because I was quite young but, it all seemed to move so fast.” Mark nodded, more to himself than anyone, fiddling with a stray thread on his t-shirt. “It’s just, I understand, how you feel, I really do.” He finished, eyes looking up to meet Johnny’s. “However, I thought we lost you when you went to college, and that realisation was more terrifying than when I first met you. That’s why when you moved away again, I was so mad. But now that I’m here, I can mostly understand why you did it.” 

It felt as if a weight had lifted from their chests, Johnny let out a sigh of relief and pulled Mark in for a tight hug. 

The holes in their relationship were finally beginning to mend. 

***

Mark’s last day in the city was spent sightseeing. 

Johnny decided to spend the remaining hours with just the two of them. He took him to all his favourite spots, plus the more famous tourist attractions — something that Johnny hadn’t done much of since moving to the city. 

He had the evening shift again, which meant he’d be able to take Mark to the bus station and say goodbye properly, before heading to work.

They were halfway through eating some lunch when Mark spoke up: “You should come home with me.” 

“What?” Johnny almost choked on his sandwich, coughing slightly. “You mean, come home, today?” 

“Yeah!” Mark sounded just as high spirited as before, not noticing Johnny’s confusion. “Your mom would love to see you, you can choose what you want to keep from your room and we can chill on that killer bus journey together. It will be fun.” 

“Mark...” Johnny sighed, “you know I can’t just do that right. I’ve got work this evening, I can’t let them down. I can’t just disappear on my friends either. Or Ten — that would be unfair for them all.” 

Mark seemed to understand, sighing to himself, but accepting his answer. “Yeah, I get it. But you should visit soon. Everyone really misses you.” He finished. 

“I’ll think about it.” Johnny agreed, nodding to his kid brother before continuing to eat. 

The rest of the day had moved on quickly and before they knew it, it was time to take Mark to the station. 

Johnny and his friends sent him off with hugs and well wishes, helping him load his bag onto the bus. 

“Have a safe journey,” Johnny said, pulling his brother in for one more hug and patting him on the shoulder, “tell everyone I say hi!” 

“I will, but Johnny, think about what I said yeah?” 

“Yeah, okay.” 

With that, Mark was waving to the group and stepping onto the bus. 

They watched as the vehicle pulled out of the station, and then turned in the direction of the subway station. 

“What did Mark mean at the end there?” Ten questioned, linking their fingers and talking low. 

“He wanted me to come home with him today.” Johnny explained, “When I told him I couldn’t, he said I should visit another time.” 

“Maybe you should.” 

“Yeah? Well, as I said to him: I’ll think about it.” 

He gave Ten’s hand a squeeze, showing his boyfriend that he really would take it into consideration. Maybe going home would be a good idea.

  
  



	15. Home?

“I’m going to do it.” 

“Do what?” 

It was the day after Johnny’s birthday. The group were busy clearing away the mess from the joint birthday party they had thrown for Dongyoung and Johnny when the latter spoke up. 

Ten, Yuta and Dongyoung all halted their movement, turning to look at Johnny with puzzled expressions. 

“I’m gonna go home, just for a day, you know see my family, grab my stuff and get out of there.” He was still clearing up while he spoke, collecting cans of drink and chucking them in a bin bag.

“Yeah?” Ten piped up again, “Why now?”

“I don’t know,” Johnny sighed, “I guess I’ve been thinking about what you said and maybe you and Mark are right. I should pay them a visit before they leave Chicago for good.” 

“When are you thinking of going?” Dongyoung queried.

“I was thinking next week, on the 20th.” He looked up then, gauging the reaction of his friends and boyfriend. 

“That should be fine.” Ten nodded: “Yeah, I’ll be able to book off some time for that,”

“What? Ten, you don't have to come with me, I wouldn't make you go through something you might be uncomfortable with.” 

“And what? Let you have all the fun without me?” He was joking, trying to lighten the situation somewhat, “Besides,” He continued, “I know you'd do the same for me.” 

Johnny and his roommates looked up at that, eyeing Ten with hesitation. 

Before anything else could be said, however, Ten changed the topic: instead, launching into what time bus they should get. 

The week moved on, and plans were made. Before Johnny even knew what was happening, the 20th had rolled around. 

As the journey to Chicago took so damn long by coach, they wouldn't actually be arriving until early the next day. So at 2 pm, Johnny and Ten loaded themselves onto a busy bus and set off. 

As expected, the coach ride really was  _ painfully _ long, and annoyingly, Johnny found himself unable to sit still for what felt like the majority of it. 

To his side, Ten dozed in and out, seemingly totally relaxed and unfazed. Where as Johnny, in the whole 21-hour journey, got all of about three hours of restless sleep. 

They were about one hour away from arriving when Johnny woke up with a jump. Jostling Ten, who had made a pillow out of his shoulder and waking him at the same time. 

“Johnny, you okay?” He croaked, rubbing his eyes and sitting up to get a better look at his boyfriend. 

Johnny nodded, letting out a deep breath and trying to relax: “I'm going to come out to my parents.” He stated, explaining his jumpy behaviour throughout the journey. 

“Okay,” Ten nodded, lacing their fingers together, “I was going to ask about that… How do you want us to behave in front of them? Because coming out can be really daunting and, if you'd rather do one thing at a time and not tell them about us, then I completely understand.” 

Johnny shook his head, “No, it’s alright. For once I want to be completely truthful with them. Plus, I don’t want to hide our relationship from anyone.” 

Ten acknowledged what he said with a nod, pressing a kiss against his knuckles and leaning his head back down onto his shoulder. 

They arrived in the city and made the short journey from the bus station to his house. 

Johnny stood outside his front door, taking one last steadying breath before ringing the doorbell. 

Instantly there was the sound of movement from inside and the door was pulled open. A petite woman stood in front of them, blinding smile appearing on her face, as she pulled Johnny in for a hug.

“John! How are you? How was the journey? Have you eaten?” She cried, rubbing his back while she bombarded him with questions, before pulling back to get a better look at him. 

“Hi, mom. I’m fine, the journey was long as usual—” 

She looked over his shoulder, noticing Ten — he gave a small wave, flashing a polite smile, “Who’s this?” She asked, not sounding at all mad that Johnny had brought someone extra, just confused, and maybe a little curious. 

“Mom,” Johnny turned in the direction of Ten, “this is Ten,” He sucked in a breath, “he’s my boyfriend.” 

Without missing a beat, his mom jumped back into the conversation, “Ah, Ten, yes I recognise you from the photograph Johnny sent, I'm so glad you decided to join him on this trip. Mark was hoping you'd come. Anyway, come in, I’ll make you both a drink first, then we can sort out your room.” 

The couple shared a look, quickly following her in and taking a seat in the living room. Mark was sitting at a desk, finishing off some homework, and his dad was sat in an armchair, sipping a cup of hot coffee. 

They both smiled as the two newcomers entered. Mark, waving enthusiastically when he saw Ten was there too. 

Once Johnny’s mom had fussed around them, making them both a coffee and a cup of tea for herself, the group sat down together. 

“So how did you two meet then?” Mark’s dad spoke up once they were all settled. 

Johnny glanced at Ten, feeling slightly confused by how easily they had accepted things “Um well,” he started, “I guess we officially met when I was commissioned to take some headshots at his old dance studio. He put his name on my list and it all kind of went from there.” 

Ten nodded, chuckling slightly at the oversimplified version. 

“I'm sorry but, Mark, did you tell them?” Johnny turned to look at his stepbrother, wanting to come to the bottom of their strangely calm reaction. 

“Hey, I wouldn't do something like that. All I said was that you were seeming happier and that you had quit smoking.” 

His mom and stepdad were chuckling at this, shaking their heads slightly, “I assumed you were dating someone in the photograph,” She admitted, “but I was stuck between Ten here, and that Yuta guy.” 

Both Johnny and Ten let out a laugh, Mrs Lee’s words lightening the situation. “We weren't even dating then!” Ten pointed out, only making the group laugh more. 

“I guess a mother just knows.” 

“So you’re okay with this?” He questioned, linking his and Ten’s hands together, “Me, not being straight?” 

The three other people in the room nodded, Johnny’s mom coming over to embrace them both in a warm hug, “Oh son, from the things we put you through, I don't think It’s our place to judge who or what makes you happy.” She explained. 

“We’re sorry, for the pressure we put you under.” Mark’s dad added, “It wasn't the right thing to do and we regret it.” 

Johnny felt a weight lift off his chest, never had he expected things to go this smoothly. “Thank you,” there was a pause before he spoke again, “I think I’m going to get on with sorting things out now if that's alright?” 

They had been allowed to leave after that, and Johnny had led the way to his room. 

***

Sorting through his things went well, he collected the most important items to take with him, boxed up the larger one to be posted later on and marked the furniture that he wanted to keep. The rest could either be donated or taken to the new property — his mom already having promised him a room there for whenever they came to visit.

“It’s so weird,” Johnny stated. He was sat on the floor of his childhood bedroom, sorting through piles of things and deciding whether to keep them or not. Ten was beside him, asking him questions about the different objects as he went along. They had been quiet for some time before Johnny spoke up. 

“What’s weird?” 

“Being home, but knowing it’s the last time I’ll ever be here,” He leant back against his bed, resting his head against the mattress, “I was really worried that when I came home, I’d realise that I really missed this place, but I don’t. The only thing I miss, is the fact that I won't be able to come back to visit once they’ve moved out.” He ended, turning to face Ten. 

“I understand what you mean.” Ten agreed before standing up and pulling Johnny to his feet, “Right, as this is your last time here then, you’d better give me the tour.” 

***

Later that day, while the group were having dinner, Johnny decided to speak up: “Mom, do you know whether dad’s in town?” 

The table became quiet, “I believe he is.” 

“Okay… I just feel that as I'm in the area, you know, it might be a good plan to stop off before we head back to the bus station.”

His mom seemed to consider this for a second, nodding and agreeing that it would probably be a good idea. 

As soon as the food had been cleared away, Johnny called him up, “Dad?”. 

“John? Hey son, what's up.” 

“Hi, I just thought I’d let you know, I’m in Chicago at the moment, and I was wondering if you’d like to catch up this evening before we head back to New York?” 

There was a pause, “Who’s we?” 

“Oh, Ten and I…” 

“Just two of you, yeah that's fine come round when you're ready. You’re welcome to bring your friend.” 

Johnny bit the inside of his cheek, considering whether to explain how Ten was more than just his  _ friend _ — he stopped himself, some things were better discussed face to face. 

“Yeah, alright… We’ll be over in an hour or so.” 

“Great, see you soon.” 

He hung up, putting away his phone and continuing to box up the last of the items.

“Everything alright?” Ten questioned, noticing the frown between Johnny’s eyebrows. 

“Yeah... well, we'll see I guess.” He shrugged, not quite sure of what his father’s reaction was going to be.

They set off soon after that, receiving warm hugs from the family, and hoisting their, now heavy, bags back onto their backs. Johnny’s family waved them off, thanking them for stopping by and telling them to visit, once they were all settled down in the new house.

Johnny agreed, and Ten thanked them for being so welcoming. 

It was one bus journey, followed by a short walk to Johnny’s dad’s place. The sky was already getting darker at this point, street lamps casting blue shadows and bathing the city in orange. 

They passed a club, loud music already pumping and people spilling out onto the street — rowdy voices calling out to passers-by. Noticing the noise, Johnny held tightly onto Ten’s hand, speeding up slightly. 

“I know them,” He explained when Ten sent him a questioning stare, “I know them from college.” 

That was all Ten needed to hear to understand, quickening his own pace and moving them out of the vicinity. Thankfully, none of the club-goers paid them any attention. 

It wasn't long after that for them to arrive at Johnny’s dad’s apartment. 

Johnny hit the buzzer. 

They waited. 

Soon some footsteps could be heard on the other side. The door opened and Johnny’s dad appeared, “Hey son, come on in.” 

He led them into the apartment and up the stairs, allowing them into his flat. 

“So…” he started, an awkward silence falling over them, “What brings you to the area?” 

Johnny cleared this throat, “I don't know if you've heard but, mom’s moving… I came to sort through my things.” He explained. 

From his father’s expression, he hadn't heard about this, raising his eyebrows but nodding along anyway. “Right I see… No time for sightseeing then?” his dad let out a dry laugh, “I assumed as you had brought a friend you might be showing him around a bit…”

Ten visibly jolted at the ‘friend’ comment, body tensing. He glanced at Johnny unsure of what his boyfriend would do next. 

As if sensing how he was feeling, Johnny linked their hands together. “Yeah dad, about that…” He glanced up watching his father’s eyes follow the movement of their hands, frown forming. He had to go through with it now. “Ten’s my boyfriend, we’re a couple.” He stated, really trying to drive the point home. 

Silence. 

His dad stood up, walking into the kitchen area and pouring himself a drink. Johnny waited for a second, meeting Ten’s concerned gaze before following him in.

“Dad, please say something.” 

Mr Suh turned around, letting out a deep sigh. “I'm sorry son.” Johnny’s stomach dropped, “I guess this is my fault. Maybe if I hadn't been so distant, you wouldn't feel the need to partake in these kinds of relationships.” 

“No, dad—”

“I was warned that this would happen. But I didn't believe them, I mean, you had a  _ girlfriend _ .” His father seemed to be rambling now, blaming himself for something that shouldn’t be apologised for at all. 

“Dad,” Johnny cut him off, Ten had also made his way into the room by this point, standing as support by his side, “This isn't your fault, in fact, this isn't something any of us need to be ashamed of, or sorry about. My attraction to men is nothing to do with your crappy parenting. And even if you had been there for me, it wouldn't have changed anything — this is me, I wouldn't want anyone to take that away.” He finished, folding his arms to hide the shaking of his hands. 

His dad seemed to consider what he had to say, nodding once more before changing the conversation onto work — a neutral topic.

They left soon after that, the awkward tension becoming too much for all of them. Johnny’s dad had hugged him before he left, apologising again and telling him that we would think about what Johnny had told him. 

Johnny wasn't going to hold him to it. 

They got to the bus station early and waited for about half an hour before they were let on. 

The mental exhaustion from the trip, finally caught up to Johnny. He lent his head against Ten’s shoulders and let himself cry, suddenly feeling overwhelmed by the events of the day. 

Ten was right there to comfort him, clutching tightly at his hands and whispering comforting words into his hair. 

Johnny didn’t even know why he was crying?

For the most part, he felt relief: the secret that he’s been hiding from his family for so long was finally out in the open. 

Even with the mixed reaction from his dad, Johnny counted this trip as a success. He had done something he’d been putting off for years, and brought himself closure with his old home town at the same time.

His mom’s reaction had been extremely reassuring, Johnny hadn't realised just how much her validation mattered to him.

Thinking about it, it was probably an accumulation of all those things that made the tears fall now. He just needed to get some sleep. It had been a long day, everything would feel better in the morning.

Overall, the journey home had gone a lot smoother. Completely worn out, Johnny found he was able to sleep for a lot of it — body finally catching up on well-needed rest. 

Arriving back to New York City, was like a breath of fresh air. The familiarity called out to Johnny, allowing him to breathe out a sigh of relief. Ten felt exactly the same, freely pressing a kiss against his boyfriend's cheek as they made their way back through the streets and towards home, their real home.

  
  



	16. Change

The month progressed, and things began to change for the group of seven.

This had started when one day, Dongyoung came back home with a script in his hand.

It had been over four months since Dongyoung’s disastrous audition, and since then he hadn't taken part in any interviews. Instead, throwing himself headfirst into work — taking more hours and busying himself with anything but acting.

So, the day he walked into the apartment flicking through the pages of a thick script, it was safe to say Yuta and Johnny were surprised.

“What've you got there Dongie?” Yuta piped up, raising his eyebrows.

“Yes, it’s a script. No, I didn’t tell you. Why? Because I didn't want anyone to comment on it.” Dongyoung explained in one go, sitting next to his friend on the sofa and bumping their shoulders together.

Yuta let out a laugh, leaning over and trying to get a look, “Let me see then!”

Johnny walked towards them at that point. He had just been about to set off to Ten’s when Dongyoung had arrived, but it wouldn’t matter if he was a couple of minutes late.

The three of them scanned the document, taking in the parts Dongyoung had highlighted and being impressed by the amount of screen time he had. “Dongyoung, this is great, like, this is really cool.” Johnny enthused, shaking his friend's arm.

“I know, I know but… I'm not going to make a big deal out of it or build it up into anything. It’s just a job, I might get it, I might not. All I can do is try.” Johnny understood where he was coming from, calming his excitement and agreeing to not blow it out of proportions.

“When’s the audition?” Yuta asked, handing the script back.

“Next month, I've got to go over scene five, that's the one they're focusing on.” He explained, flicking to the corresponding page and letting Yuta read over it.

“I’ll practice with you.” Their friend was quick to offer, “It will help me take my mind off my audition.”

Over the past few weeks, Yuta had been working hard toward his first part in a real Broadway show. The past year of dancing had helped out, and he had managed to get to the second round of auditions for an up and coming show. His next interview was in a week, but until then he would be stuck going over the song he had prepared and stressing himself out.

This was the perfect opportunity to think of something else for a while.

Johnny smiled at his friends as he watched them launch into action, chuckling at the voice Yuta decided for his character. “Right guys, I’m off, see you tomorrow evening, yeah?” He questioned, grabbing his coat and heading for the door.

“Yeah, we’ll be there, meeting at Ten’s place right?”

“Yup that's right.”

Tomorrow was Ten’s birthday and the younger planned to have everyone over for a takeout and movie marathon.

It was going to be chill and low key, the perfect way to celebrate.

***

When Johnny arrived at his boyfriend’s apartment, there was an air of excitement surrounding the place.

The three dancers were chatting loudly in the kitchen, not even noticing as Johnny entered: “What’s happening?” He whispered into Ten's ear, chuckling when he startled slightly.

“Johnny, I didn't see you enter. Hi!” He greeted, turning around to place a kiss against his lips.

Johnny kissed him back, happy to see him in such a good mood. “We were just discussing the dance show.” He explained, “Taeyong, Gem and I have been placed in a group with two other dancers, it’s not a solo but as it’s our first show in the company, we’re still really excited.”

After his injury, Ten had been unsure if he’d even be able to take part in this term's dance show, at all. He had worked hard to keep up with the others, training in his spare time and practising diligently.

The day’s they’d been away visiting Johnny’s family, were the first ones he’d had off since the end of January. Although, he was being more careful this time around — taking plenty of rests and spending extra time on his warm ups. Not eager to repeat or worsen his injury from before.

Thankfully, all the hard work had paid off and now, he and his friends were all going to be showcased together, Johnny was proud of them all.

***

“Good morning birthday boy,” 

The time was 10:30 in the morning, on Ten’s Twenty-second Birthday.

Johnny had gotten up beforehand, preparing pancakes for breakfast in bed and putting on a pot of coffee.

There wasn't much planned for the day, other than Ten going to dance practice, Johnny having work — and the evening celebration with friends. Because of this, Johnny hadn't wanted to unnecessarily disturb his boyfriend, waiting until the food was finished before waking him up.

Now, in front of him, Ten stirred in his sleep, twisting his body and letting out a yawn.

“I made pancakes…” Johnny continued, smiling when Ten’s eyes fluttered open and he pushed himself up in bed.

“Hmm, you treat me so well.” Ten mumbled, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes and pulling the plate towards him, “Thanks, babe.”

Johnny chuckled, grabbing his fork and digging into the stack, “It’s your birthday, you deserve all the treats!”

They ate comfortably together, chatting and enjoying the lazy morning in bed.

Ten’s two roommates had come in at some point, singing a rather out of tune rendition of happy birthday, and handing him his gifts.

Beaming at his friends, Ten ripped into the paper, thanking them for their thoughtful gifts. He received: A home-baked cake from Taeyong, a joint present of a new record from Gem and Kiya, and a pack of five films from Johnny (Yuta and Dongyoung would be bringing their gifts over in the afternoon).

Ten thanked them all, pulling them in for a group hug and giving each a kiss on the cheek.

He loved celebrating his birthday, and what better way to start it than surrounded by the people he loved.

“Don’t let Yuta, Dongyoung or Kiya hear that,” Taeyong had joked, “or they’ll be storming over and demanding to be included.”

Ten had laughed hard at that, “They are included!” He stated, “It’s going to be even better when they get here later.”

The room had cleared out soon after that. Their other friends getting on with their day, and leaving the couple alone.

The new record was put on, Ten moving from his bedroom to place the cake back in the fridge, Johnny cleared up the plates from breakfast and placed the wrapping paper in the recycling.

Once they were both finished, they met up in the kitchen, leaning against the counter; shoulders brushing.

“So, what time did you say dance was?” Johnny queried, he had been humming along to the tune in the background, waiting for Ten to finish up what he was doing before speaking.

The younger paused, checking the time and humming to himself, “I should probably leave in about… two hours.” He concluded, nodding and turning in Johnny’s direction. A smirk appeared on his face.

“Oh yeah,” Johnny hummed in reply, faking innocence. “Well, now that everyone’s left... How about I give you your second birthday present?

Ten let out a chuckle, biting his lip and letting his eyes trail over Johnny’s body, “Hmm, and what would that be?” He questioned — tone low as he spoke. He moved forward into Johnny’s space, caging him in against the counter, arms on either side of his body.

"Well..." Johnny didn’t hesitate in hoisting him up, holding tight as Ten wrapped his legs around his waist, “How about, absolutely anything you want?” He whispered, moving his lips teasingly close to his ear — Teeth catching on one of his earrings.

Groaning at the implications, Ten leant forward to finally connect their lips, “I thought you'd never ask.”

***

After the morning, Ten had set off to dance, and Johnny to work — leaving each other with a long goodbye kiss and a ‘see you soon’.

The city was bright and fresh, sunlight cutting through the thick clouds and bathing the streets in pale light — signs of spring beginning to make themselves known.

Johnny walked down the subway steps, grabbing the first train and taking the short journey to his part of the city. He was in a bright mood today, happy to celebrate Ten’s birthday, and excited to spend time with the full group, later on.

Arriving at the shop early, Johnny greeted his coworkers and wandered over to the tills. “Hey Kiya,”

“Hey Johnny, you’re in a good mood?”

Johnny laughed, “I sure am!”

The majority of his shift went on as usual. He stacked shelves, put in a new order and worked at the till. The usual mundane jobs moving quickly — helped by his good mood and excitement of getting back to Ten later.

It was nearing the end of his workday when a person holding flyers entered the store.

They walked directly over to Johnny, who was currently manning the till and flashed him a polite smile, “Hi there, my name's Peyton. I work as part of the Long Road Gallery. We’ve just set up, and to celebrate our opening we’re looking to hold a competition.” They handed a poster to Johnny, he scanned over the information.

“You see, we want to put on a show, exhibiting local artists — this is a pretty popular shop, so I was wondering if you’d be able to display a couple of these around the place.”

Johnny nodded, still reading through the information.

The completion was open to all artists, painters, sculptures, photographers… It seemed pretty interesting… “Yeah,” Johnny agreed, we’ll put them up for you.” He smiled kindly at the person in front of him, taking a couple more posters.

Just then, Kiya noticed them talking.

She made her way over and introduced herself as the shop manager. The two of them chatted for a while, discussing the exhibition and the opportunities it would give to the artists selected. The more Johnny heard, the more inspired he felt.

Kiya seemed to notice this, turning to him with a glint in her eye as Peyton left the shop. “You’re gonna submit some work right?” she questioned.

“Do you think I should?” Johnny suppressed a smile as he spoke — mind pretty much made up already.

“What kinda question is that?  _ Of course _ , you should. This is the perfect opportunity to get your stuff out there. I mean  _ come on _ , they literally want work depicting New York City — you've been photographing the people and the surrounding area for almost a year now, I think you definitely have a good selection of images for this.” She stated, grabbing hold of his shoulders and shaking them wildly.

“If you don't submit some work, I’ll tell Ten about it and he’ll kick your ass until you do.” She warned, pointing a stern finger at him.

Johnny was laughing loudly by this point, already itching to sort through his photographs and chose the set he’d be submitting, “Okay, okay, I’ll do it!”

They had wrapped up their shift soon after that

Passing on the responsibility of the shop to the next set of staff and leaving together.

The two of them chatted excitedly throughout the journey, discussing favourite movies and what to watch tonight. It had been a while since just the seven of them had met up — a fact that made this evening even more special.

Arriving at the apartment, they were greeted with loud chatter and music.

Yuta and Dongyoung had turned up already — getting the party going with their gift of a cocktail set — a sweet scent of something artificial mixed with vodka hit them as they walked into the main living space.

“Heyyy, our hard workers are home!” Yuta called from where he was lounging on a chair. With one hand, he held a fancy-looking cocktail, with the other, he waved enthusiastically.

The two newcomers waved back, only being able to take a few steps into the room before they were bombarded by their corresponding significant others.

Johnny got an arm full of a tipsy Ten, who pushed a sugary kiss against his lips before handing him a glass of pink liquid. “Is that candy floss?” He questioned, cocking an eyebrow at his boyfriend but taking a large swig of the brightly coloured concoction, nonetheless. Ten only nodded, giggling when Johnny winced at the somehow both sickly sweet and extremely sour drink.

Gem handed a glass to Kiya, and Taeyong wandered in with the remainder of the jug — topping up everyone’s drinks before sitting themselves down in an available space.

They chatted happily for a little while before ordering food, Ten excitedly running to the door as soon as the buzzer sounded.

After that, the group settled in to watch some movies: laughing at the cringe-worthy comedies, getting  _ way _ too invested in the dramas, and singing along loudly to their favourite Disney films.

It was just as they were wrapping up the night's activities, that Johnny remembered the competition. “Oh yeah, you wouldn’t believe what happened today at work,” he began, speaking loud enough for the whole group to hear.

“What happened?” Yuta called, looking as if he was ready to fight anyone who caused his friends' trouble.

Johnny laughed at his reaction, pulling out the flyer and waving it in front of him. Quickly snatching it, Ten scanned over the information — eyes widening. “A competition, Johnny this is so great, you have to enter!”

“Yeah, don’t worry I will. It’s not every day that opportunities like this  _ literally _ walk into your life.” He chuckled at his boyfriend's enthusiasm, watching as the flyer was passed around to the others, each one of them seeming just as excited.

“Do you know what pictures you're going to submit?” Gem queried once the poster had gotten to her.

“Ah well, that’s a secret... you guys are just gonna have to wait and see at the exhibition...”

“Wow, someone’s confident.” Ten chided, poking his boyfriend in the cheek.

“You know what, I kind of am. Like I think I might actually have a chance at this.”

Ten seemed happy at his statement, pushing his arm playfully while he smiled brightly.

“Hey,” Dongyoung piped up, “just in case you need it, I give you permission to use pictures of me.”

“I second that statement!” Taeyong agreed.

Soon, there were sounds of agreement from all across the room, each friend asking to be a part of this with Johnny. His friends were the best.

The mood was changed slightly by a loud scoff coming from Ten: “Guys, please. Like any of the photos are gonna be you... I’m pretty sure most of his portfolio is made up of my face.”

There was silence. The group turning to watch, as Ten fluttered his eyelashes.

“Hmm, you’ve got a point there, babe.” Johnny agreed.

As soon as the words left his mouth, there was a cry of outrage. Each member of the group demanding to be part of a future photoshoot.

The couple let out a laugh, ignoring their friends' complaints and instead, cuddling into each other.

They finished the day of celebration, by crashing out in various places around the apartment. Heads fuzzy from the cocktails, eyes heavy and cheeks sore from smiling so much.

***

“Guys. GUYS!” Yuta crashed through the apartment door, out of breath and red in the face. His eyes were wide and hair messed up.

He didn't stop moving, slamming the door behind him and practically running into the room.

“Yuta, are you alright?” Dongyoung asked, concern evident in his voice. He had been reading through his lines for what felt like the 50th time that day when his roommate had burst through the door — demanding his attention.

Hearing the noise, a disgruntled looking Ten stuck his head out of Johnny’s doorway, pulling his boyfriend out with him when he noticed the shell shocked expression on the Japanese man's face. “Shit what happened?” Johnny asked, detaching himself from Ten and making sure his friend was alright.

Yuta didn’t glance at him — eyes seemingly fixated on the piece of paper trapped between his shaking hands. “Guys...” He said, a lot quieter this time. “I made it.” With that he handed the paper over to Johnny, watching him scan the document before happiness spread across his features.

“Holy shit Yuta, fucking yes man!” He exclaimed, pulling his friend in for a one-armed hug as he handed the sheet over to Dongyoung.

“Let me see, let me see.” Ten complained, leaning over Dongyoung’s shoulder and taking in the words for himself.

Written on the paper, was a list of names. A list of names that happened to the titled: Chorus members.

And who should be fifth on the list? None other than their very own: Nakamoto Yuta.

Dongyoung and Ten both let out a screech when they saw what was written, leaping forward and pulling everyone in for a group hug.

Yuta still seemed a little out of it. Struggling to believe it was even real. “I’m, gonna be, in a real Broadway show? Me?” The realisation seemed to sink in then. His eyes welling up with pure relief.

All the effort he had put in over the years — the singing lessons, the dance practice. Everything he had done before this, had all been worth it —  _ finally _ , he had made it. His name in Broadway lights.

Completely overwhelmed, he made his way over to the nearest armchair before practically collapsing into it.

Even after living with him for almost a year, Johnny had never seen him react this way — realising just how much this gig meant to his friend.

Yuta’s achievement had been a good enough reason to celebrate, and soon enough, the group of friends found themselves back in their favourite pizza place — chatting loudly and sharing several large pizzas.

At some point, Yuta had gotten over his initial shock. Now loudly boasting about his (self-proclaimed)  _ killer _ audition that left the room practically  _ in tears _ and  _ definitely _ guaranteed him a spot in _ at least _ the next two years of shows.

Johnny was just pleased to see his friend back to his usual self.

He and Ten shared a look, silently rolling their eyes at Yuta’s dramatic ass. They were happy for him, of course, they were... but that didn’t mean they were going to be letting him off easy from now on. What are friends for, if not to take the piss out of each other from time to time.

Dongyoung was quieter, he was completely over the moon at Yuta’s success. However, a part of him was also anxious. His own audition looming in the not so far future.

For now, he pushed his thoughts away. This was Yuta’s moment of glory, he deserved to be as loud as he wanted.

***

“How're things going for the competition by the way?” Ten asked one afternoon. The couple were walking hand in hand on their way back from Procaffination. Ten had just finished his shift and, as Johnny had been free, he decided to meet him there.

“Yeah, it’s going well. I sent off my submissions yesterday. Now all I’ve got to do is wait.”

Ten nodded, “I’m proud of you, you know that right?”

“You are?” Johnny turned his head to look down at his boyfriend, unable to stop the soft smile that appeared.

“Yeah,” Ten confirmed. “It’s all really exciting. I can’t wait to see your work in an actual gallery.”

Johnny chuckled, “That’s if I get selected,”

“You will, they’d be crazy to ignore talent like you.”

A bubble of anxiety welled up in Johnny, a thought that had been bothering him for a while popping back into his mind: “But what if...” He hesitated, “what if I’m actually not that great? What if they see through my facade of confidence and notice that I’m just a complete amateur?” He let his worries spill out, voicing his thoughts from over the last few days.

Ten gave his hand a firm squeeze. “Don’t doubt your ability, Johnny.” He spoke kindly. “I mean, do you think I would have agreed to be photographed by you if your work wasn’t any good?” Johnny shrugged, “Look, you might be hot, but I’m not that shallow! I need a genuine reason to want to spend time with someone. You, being a super talented photographer, gave me all the excuse I needed.”

Johnny let out a loud laugh at that, bumping their shoulders together. He leaned down to press a kiss against his cheek. However, just before he got there, Ten turned his face, meeting him in the middle and pressing his lips firmly against Johnny’s. The move wasn’t particularly unexpected, but it still pulled a laugh out of Johnny nonetheless. “So, you think I’m hot?”

“Bitch we’ve been dating since August, yeah I think you’re hot.”

“Well, in that case, I think you’re hot too!”

“Fuck off Johnny,” He laughed, without a hint of malice in his voice.

“No, I know you love me really.”

“Goddamn it, I really do”

***

It was a week after submissions closed that Johnny heard back from the competition.

He was laying in bed, with his arms wrapped securely around Ten’s waist. The two of them would have to get up soon, but for now, they each pretended to forget about their responsibility, and instead, snuggle further into the other’s embrace.

Or at least that was the plan. Until Johnny’s phone alarm sounded for the third time that morning.

Instead of hitting snooze, as he had already done several times over, Johnny sighed deeply and pushed himself up to a sitting position.

Next to him, Ten made a sound of protest, hands attaching onto his t-shirt, and trying to pull him back down to the warmth of the covers. “Don’t go,” he pouted, “let’s just take today off.”

As tempting as it sounded, Johnny was really needed at work today. Plus, he knew Ten had dance practice later — there was no way he’d happily miss a session just to cuddle for longer. “Sorry baby.” He smiled, leaning down to press a kiss first against his forehead, then his cheeks before finally landing on his lips.

It was when he, eventually, pulled away (to stop the alarm that was still blaring in the background), that he saw the notification.

His eyes scanned over the email, unlocking his phone as quickly as possible, and scrolling through the document.

Noticing his more serious mood, Ten pushed himself up in bed. Resting his head against Johnny’s shoulder, and waiting for him to explain.

“Ten,” Johnny uttered, after looking through the email twice. “My photography was selected.”

***

The next few weeks were particularly busy.

After receiving the email, Johnny set about sorting out his prints.

He met with the gallery curators to discuss the display area and what size prints he could do, before heading straight to NYPhotographic — the only shop he’d be trusting with his first exhibition.

His friends had been happy when he shared the news.

Happy, of course, but not at all surprised. Now, they were just excited to see the pictures Johnny had selected — A fact he was still keeping as a close secret.

So close in fact that one day, Ten had walked into Johnny’s room, saying a quick hello just in time for his boyfriend to jump up in shock and throw a blanket at him. “WHAT THE—” Ten cried, struggling against the material that had been flung into his face. “Johnny, what was that for? A little help please?”

“I’m sorry Ten,” he laughed, scoping him and the blanket up in one go, “I picked up the first prints today and I just need to finish wrapping them.” He explained, placing a struggling Ten down in the living room, and pulling the blanket from his head.

His boyfriend scowled up at him, folding his arms and putting on an exaggerated pout.

“I don’t want the surprise to be ruined,” He tried to reason.

Unable to stay mad at Johnny over something like this, Ten cracked a smile shaking his head before throwing the blanket back at him. “Fine whatever, I’ll just lie here looking irresistible for the next half an hour or something.” He chided, fluttering his eyelashes before falling dramatically back onto the sofa.

Johnny looked conflicted, his gaze flicked between his bedroom and his boyfriend — lip trapped between his teeth. “It won’t take half an hour...”

“Well, that’s a relief. I don’t want to be waiting all day...” he sent a wink in Johnny directing, giving him a playful push with his foot, “now go, before I get bored of looking pretty.”

This made Johnny laugh, shaking his head but turning toward his room anyway, “You’re the best Ten, thanks for understanding!”

“I know, I know, I am pretty amazing.”

It took about ten minutes for Johnny to pack the photographs, parcelling them up and storing them safely away.

He left his bedroom, to find Ten still lying prettily — now with his phone positioned in front of his face as he scrolled through Twitter.

“All done,” he stated, squeezing himself into the sofa and effectively distracting his boyfriend from social media.

“That took you long enough,” Ten joked, pretending to check his nonexistent watch — before pocketing his phone and looping his arms around Johnny's neck. “Come here,”

Johnny leant forward, easily connecting their lips in a slow kiss.

Ten was quick to pull him down for more, nipping at his bottom lip and drawing a whine out of him. Johnny always was so quick to become affected by his actions.

“What do we have planned for this evening?” Ten asked, breaking the kiss, but continuing to run a hand through Johnny’s hair.

“No plans from what I know, why?”

“It’s just, you’ve been working so hard recently and I thought it would be nice to get a take out or something?”

“I think you mean we’ve been working hard. I haven’t exactly seen you slacking off either.”

Ten scoffed, hitting his arm gently, “you know exactly what I mean... so what do you think?”

Johnny pretended to give it some thought, but already, the idea of eating some greasy take out food was sounding very pleasing. “Yeah, why not!”

A few hours later, the couple were lounging back on the sofa. Bodies stuffed — with plenty of food still left over. “We, definitely, ordered too much,” Ten complained, patting his stomach and letting out a groan, “I think I’m gonna slip into a food coma.”

“Yeah, maybe that last sweet and sour chicken didn’t need to be ordered.” Johnny agreed, pushing his plate onto the coffee table and out of his way.

Just as he rolled away from the food, with the intent to snuggle on the sofa for the rest of the evening, the front door opened.

Dongyoung quietly made his way into the apartment, dropping his bag down with a sigh and relaxing into the armchair. “Don’t let me stop you,” he mumbled, noticing the way the couple looked up as he entered. “I’ll get out of your way soon.”

There was a pause.

“How’d it go today Dongyoung?” Johnny spoke. Sitting up some more and taking in his friend’s deflated mood.

“Well, I didn’t get it if that’s what you’re wondering...”

“Oh, I’m sorry man.”

It had been the day of Dongyoung’s audition. After weeks of rehearsals, he had set off in hopes of getting a part in a new series. By the looks of things, this hadn’t gone to plan.

“No, really it’s fine. Sure I’m a little down, but I’m not at all disheartened. I’ll get over it in a few hours.” He assured.

“So, what’s the plan now?” Ten piped up.

Finally, this cracked a small smile out of their friends: “I’ve actually got another audition. They said that although I don’t work for this part, they’d like to see me come back for a different character. I’ll be honest, the part is a bit smaller — but right now I’ll take what I can get, you know?”

“One step at a time man,” Dongyoung nodded, agreeing with what Johnny had to say, “Oh, you’re welcome to help yourself by the way.” Johnny motioned to the food in front of them, “You look like you could do with some greasy take out.”

“Thanks, guys” Dongyoung smiled. digging in and already seeming more himself.

One step at a time — sometimes, it was important for all of them to remember that.

***

“Hi, mom?”

“Johnny, hey how're things going in New York. I wasn’t expecting to hear from you so soon.”

“Yeah, things are going good... actually, I'm just calling to let you know that my work is being exhibited at the end of this month.”

“Your work, as in your photography?”

“Yeah,”

“Wow, John! That’s so impressive — congratulations.”

“Thanks, mom, and I was wondering, would like to come to the private view?”

“What are the dates?”

They chatted on a bit more, talking more about the exhibition and the work Johnny had put into it. Johnny’s mom said she’d try and get the time off — promising to let him know as soon as she could.

Once the conversation had finished, Johnny hung up, chucking his phone onto the nearby table and flopping back onto the sofa with a sigh of relief.

“What did she say?”

“She said she’d try and make it — they’d all try and make it. So we’ll see I guess.” Johnny explained, leaning into the comfortable touch of his boyfriend. For some reason, contacting his family still filled him with dread. Even though their relationship was beginning to fix itself — a larger part of him couldn’t shake the feeling that he’d still let them down. It was something he still needed to work on.

“And your dad? Are you going to call him?”

At this Johnny let out a chuckle: “You know my mom just asked the same question.”

“And?” Ten egged on.

“I don’t know yet... maybe but I don’t know... he might just make things uncomfortable.” Johnny shrugged.

Ten couldn’t exactly argue with that.

Although Johnny and his father hadn’t spoken much since they’d got back to New York — tensions between them seemed to be higher than ever.

Probably because the times they had chatted, his dad hadn’t once brought up the topic of Johnny and Ten. And therefore, was yet to let him know if he’d given what they talked about any thought.

But then again, Ten knew that Johnny's passion for photography had been started because of his dad. Surely, he’d want to see what kind of work his son had been producing?

Ten crossed his fingers, secretly hoping something would be sorted out in time.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are close to the end now, only one more chapter!! 
> 
> Thank you for reading to this point, and I hope you enjoy the rest of it


	17. They Come To New York

“Hey, over here!” Johnny raised his hand, waving to a small group of people who were just exiting the airport.

His family had managed to get the time off that they needed for Johnny's exhibition. And being the perfect son that he was, Johnny had agreed to pick them up, wanting to make sure they got to their hotel alright and knew the plan for the evening.

“Johnny, there you are.” His mom exclaimed as she made her way towards him, greeting him with a tight hug. “You’d think I’d be able to find you easily with how tall you are.” She joked, taking a step back and noticing the lack of people around him. “No Ten today?”

“Mom,” Johnny whined, shaking his head slightly, “we’re not joined by the hip you know?” There was a pause, “Besides... he’s got dance.” He added, quickly changing the subject when Mark let out a loud huff of laughter.

He greeted the rest of the family after that, pulling Mark in for a hug, and settling and a half-wave to his stepdad.

It was kind of surreal seeing them all in New York City — as if two of his worlds were colliding. Surreal but not at all unpleasant. Truth be told, Johnny was actually quite excited about this. Looking forward to showing them around and introducing them to everyone.

His life in New York was something he was proud of. And, with his exhibition mere hours away, he kinda wanted to show off a bit.

The hotel they were staying at was, thankfully, not too far from the gallery and Johnny was able to point it out before taking them to check-in.

After that, he led the way to his apartment. Of course, this wasn’t new or particularly interesting for Mark, who had stayed there on his last visit. But, as his mom and stepdad had never seen it before, he felt as if that was the best place to start.

“And here we are, home sweet home,” Johnny stated, as he unlocked the door, and welcomed the group in.

His mom looked around the place, scanning her eyes over the different objects and furnishings. “It’s so small?” She mumbled, walking straight to the kitchen and checking the content of the fridge.

Johnny let out a bark of laughter — he just knew she would say something like that. “Yeah you think this room is small, wait till you see my bedroom.”

With that, he crossed the small space and unlocked his bedroom door, pushing it open to show the full extent of his limited space.

His mom's eyes went wide, she walked in, squeezing between the desk and his bed before plopping herself down.

“Honestly, the lack of space doesn’t bother me. Other than night times, the apartment is hardly ever full because we’re all busy throughout the day — but even when it is busy, we never seem to get on each other’s nerves.” He chuckled, watching his mom look out the window before turning to him with a smile.

“I like it here.”

***

They had hung around in his apartment for a while, Johnny made them all a drink, before sitting to discuss the plans for the evening.

“So, Dongyoung and Yuta should be arriving soon, and then the idea is we’re all gonna get ready before meeting the others at this pizzeria. Are you guys still up for that?”

There were sounds of agreement across the room, his family feeling excited to meet the rest of Johnny’s friends.

As expected, it wasn’t long before his roommates returned from work.

Dongyoung was the first to enter, saying a polite greeting to Johnny's family before excusing himself to the bathroom. “It’s nice to meet you all,” he smiled, giving a small bow out of respect.

It’s safe to say Johnny’s mom took an instant liking to him.

It was a short time after that for Yuta to arrive, making his way into the apartment in a louder manner. “MARK!” He cried, practically throwing himself at the younger. Noticing the others, he quickly straightened up, flashing his signature smile and instantly winning the parents over, “Hi, you must be Mr and Mrs Lee, it’s nice to meet you, I’m Yuta.”

He walked towards them, shaking their hands, a bright smile still on his face, “I’m sure you’ve heard loads about me!”

“Actually, John hasn’t spoken much about any of you.” His mom chuckled, making the Japanese man turn a sharp glare towards his roommate. “However,” she added, “Mark has told us quite a bit about someone named Hyuck. Will we be seeing him later?”

Johnny raised his eyebrows at his younger brother, noticing the deep blush that had risen on his face.

“Donghyuck, really?” He had whispered, once his parents were fully engaged in a conversation with Yuta, something about his Broadway rehearsals.

“Shut up...” Mark hissed in reply, halfheartedly pushing at Johnny’s arm.

The group split up to get ready then, Johnny’s family heading back to the hotel, while he and his roommates headed to their rooms.

Johnny got dressed without a fuss, grabbing the outfit he had selected earlier, and slipping into it.

He ran a brush through his hair, styling it to the best of his ability before grabbing his Polaroid camera and heading into the main living space.

Yuta emerged at the same time as him, sliding into a nice jacket and grabbing a pair of dress shoes.

As always, Dongyoung was already waiting, leaning by the door while he scrolled through his phone. “Let’s do this,”

The three of them set off, picking up Johnny’s family on the way and making the short journey to their favourite pizza place.

As they entered, they were met with the calls from the four other members of their group. Ten, Taeyong, Kiya and Gem were already sat at their usual table, flicking through the menu — as if they weren’t just going to go for their usual order.

Ten stood up when the group came closer, greeting Johnny with a kiss hello, before waving hi to the others.

“Hmm, you clean up nicely...” Ten whispered to him once the group had been properly introduced, leaning close, before flicking an appreciated gaze over his outfit.

“I could say the same to you,” Johnny flirted back, blushing slightly when his mom cleared her throat.

The rest of his friends seemed to find this hilarious, thanking her for finally stepping in to save them from becoming massive thirds wheels.

“Bitch, before me and Johnny we had to put up with you and Kiya.” Ten complained, slapping a hand over his mouth when he realised he’d swore in front of Johnny and Mark’s parents.

Luckily for him, Mr and Mrs Lee had a good sense of humour and didn’t blink twice at his use of language.

Johnny gave him a reassuring knee squeeze, letting out a laugh.

“Hmm, he’s got a point, you know...” Kiya agreed, holding her girlfriends hand over the table and looking at her with warmth in her eyes.

Johnny’s mom cooed.

The group ordered and ate relatively quickly, eager to get finished and over to the exhibition.

As they got closer to leaving, a bubble of anxiety began to grow within Johnny — doubts casting shadows over his previous excitement and making a frown appear between his eyebrows.

Noticing this, Ten spoke up: “Ready for this?” He questioned, linking his hand with Johnny’s and giving it a comforting squeeze.

Johnny let out the breath he’d been holding, turning to properly look at Ten and trying to reassure him with a smile. “As I’ll ever be.”

The walk to the gallery wasn’t long — a fact that didn’t help settle Johnny’s nerves. They approached the front doors; two large glass panels between them and the inside. It was already pretty busy, family and friends of the other artists milling around and sipping from champagne glasses.

Johnny felt suddenly very out of place. He would have bolted right there and then if it wasn’t for the reassuring press of Ten’s hand in his, and the comforting presence of his friends behind him.

Taking a deep breath, he pulled the door open and walked in.

“Hi, Johnny.” It was Peyton, one of the curators of the exhibition. “It’s good to see you and your family. Would you like some champagne.”

“Thanks,” Johnny accepted the glass, taking a sip while the rest of the group (apart from Mark) were handed their own.

“Well, I hope you enjoy the show! There are lots of great artists in exhibition today.” Peyton finished, flashing a bright smile at them before stepping away.

The group mingled their way through the room, chatting quietly about the other work, and commenting on the nice exhibition space.

It really was quite crowded: people chatting, viewing work, talking prices and drinking champagne.

After around ten minutes of working their way through the room, Johnny stopped in front of a large wall. “And, this is my work.” He stated, turning to the group to introduce it properly.

Altogether, his exhibition was made up of twelve photographs. There were ten individual prints and two framed sets: one made out of Polaroid’s, one 35mm film shots.

The group scanned over the exhibition, before walking up for a closer look.

Johnny hung back — happy to watch the others explore, before answering any of their questions.

He had put in a lot of consideration about the whole exhibition, choosing pictures that he thought would work best to depict both the theme of the show (New York City) and his personal title: They Come To New York.

The first set showed six 35mm shots from around his apartment complex. This included: the view from the rooftop, the dated burgundy hallways, the wear and tear of the building, and a few shots from the 4th of July celebrations. He liked this set, it was the only one that didn’t include some form of portraiture — focusing on scenery alone.

The Polaroid set, on the other hand, was a little different: “Johnny you did not put this shoot in your exhibition?” Ten sounded slightly alarmed as he spoke, walking quickly over to the set of four and scanning over them.

Letting out a chuckle, Johnny moved over to join him. “Well, what else was I going to do with them?” He questioned, slinging an arm around Ten’s neck. He had thought long and hard about whether to include these images or not. In the end, deciding to go with the more artful and abstract ones.

The set of four images depicted Ten from the nude photoshoot they did last year. There was a picture of Ten’s back, bathed in natural sunlight, one focusing on the blush on his chest, a close up of his lips and finally, their linked hands pressed against the duvet cover.

Ten’s eyes traced over the images. As expected, they were really beautiful. During the shoot, the two of them had spent a lot of time working on compositions and lighting. This had most definitely paid off. Ten looked almost ethereal, the location and colours only adding to the intimacy that was portrayed in the frame.

Across from them, Yuta let out a cry, followed by a loud laugh: “What am I doing? Johnny, was this taken on your first day in the city?”

Nodding, Johnny left Ten’s side for a moment, making his way over to his friend with a laugh of his own. “Yup, what do you think?”

the grainy shot depicted Yuta from the rooftop, he was grinning wide with his arms thrown out behind him — standing precariously on one of the plastic chairs. 

“I think I was definitely showing off a bit, jeez, look how cocky I am...”

“I think you’ll find, you're still exactly like that.” Dongyoung piped up. He had been looking at a photograph taken in one of their summer park adventures. The whole group had been there, but this image, in particular, focused on him — flicking through the pages of a script.

“Shut up! I’m not that bad.” The group of friends sent looks of disbelief towards Yuta, laughing when his cheeks stained pink and he let out a loud huff.

Next to that image were three smaller prints. One of a crowded subway station, one a crowded party and the third, the makeshift corridors of the record store. They were presented in a triptych one above the other.

Gem, Taeyong and Kiya, were currently gathered around a print from one of the first photoshoots Johnny had done with the latter. It was the photograph of Kiya lounging artfully against the couch in Gem’s apartment. He was still extremely proud of how this shoot had turned out, knowing it was definitely one of the pictures he wanted to include.

“Thank you,” Kiya spoke up — the group of three had turned to look at him as he approached, “thank you for letting us be a part of this.” She continued, smiling brightly and gazing over the images with a sense of awe.

“Thank you for letting me take your picture, this exhibition wouldn’t be the same without you all in it.”

They shared a smile, Kiya reaching out to squeeze his hand, before releasing him and turning to the next photograph.

Past that, were the images of the dancers. There was one big print, focusing on Gem and Taeyong as they practiced one of their show dances together, working out the problems and helping each other improve.

Below that was a picture of Ten from the roof: red shirt billowing against the wind, body captured in mid-movement.

And finally, “Ah, the image that started it all...” Taeyong hummed, bringing the group's attention to one of the larger prints.

Looking back at them was the picture of Ten, from over a year ago now. Arms Raised in a stretch, far off look in his eye.

“I should have known you’d include this one.” Ten laughed, pressing himself close to Johnny’s side.

“Well, it is one of my favourites.” He replied easily, smiling up at the print. It was true. Even though half his portfolio was taken up with pictures of his boyfriend, there was just something about this image that drew him in.

Something about the look in his eyes, the way his hair fell over his face, how his body was contorted.

It took Johnny straight back to that day. Watching in awe as his eyes landed back on the beautiful stranger from the subway — as always, unable to look away as he seemingly captivated the room with his entrance.

To him, the photograph displayed the start of something exciting. Something new, something that neither he or Ten could even begin to predict. Not at that time, anyway. He loved everything about it, something that even after a whole year of photographing and knowing Ten, hadn't changed.

“Hey, I recognise this one.” Mark interrupted his train of thought and instead directed towards the very last picture of the exhibition.

It was the group photo that had been taken as a gift for Mark last summer. Johnny had digitalised it before sending it off, and when looking for images too include had stumbled back upon it. It just felt right to include it — seeing them all so happy together as a group — a family.

“God I love that picture.” Dongyoung hummed, smiling brightly at the image.

“Me too!” Gem laughed.

The others soon joined in, reminiscing about that time and joking about how things had already changed so much.

The group split up a bit after that, Johnny’s mom congratulating him before deciding to look around a bit more. “I’m so proud of you John.” She smiled, eyes brimming with happy tears, “you’ve come so far.” Johnny had hugged her, sending her off soon after to enjoy the rest of the exhibition. After all, he had some mingling to do as well.

“Oh Mark,” Johnny called as his brother went to follow their parents, “here take this.” He handed over the Polaroid camera that had been hanging around his neck since he had stepped out the door. “I probably won’t have time to use it, but I thought it’d be cool if you could document the evening for me.”

Mark’s eyes lit up, eagerly grabbing the camera. “Oh my god, would that be alright?” He questioned, voice full of surprise.

“Yeah man, I wouldn’t have offered if it wasn’t.” Mark flashed one last big grin, before hopping back into the crowd, “it’s only got eight exposures so make them count!” Johnny called after him, laughing slightly as Mark raised his hand in a thumbs up.

Turning around at the call of his name, Johnny’s eyes fell on Ten. The younger was waving him over, standing next to the couple who own NYPhotographic.

Smiling brightly, Johnny went to greet them — slightly surprised to see them both here. “Hi,” he spoke as soon as he got into talking distance, “I wasn’t expecting to see you?”

His favourite shop owner scoffed slightly, “Like we’d miss our number one customer’s first exhibition.” She joked, pulling him in for a hug. “Your work looks beautiful by the way. It’s so good to see it celebrated like this.”

Johnny thanked her, smiling at her husband, before linking his hand with Ten’s — a move that had become automatic by now.

“Thanks for choosing our shop, kid.” Her husband spoke, patting him on the back before shaking his hand, “I swear it's you keeping us in business, you know.” Johnny knew he was exaggerating, but the sentiment was still sweet.

He accepted the handshake, promising to keep going to them in the future, “There’s no one I’d trust more!”

Unfortunately, their friendly conversation was interrupted by a tap on Johnny’s shoulder.

Upon seeing who was after his attention, Johnny tensed up.

“Dad...” Johnny felt his throat tighten.

“Hi, son.” 

There was a pause, in which the NYPhotographic owners bid their goodbyes — noting the sudden change in atmosphere.

“What are you doing here?” He didn’t mean for his statement to come off as so harsh, feeling his jaw clench as an awkward tension seemed to grow around them.

Ten stuck close to his side, watching the interaction quietly — hand not loosening its grip on Johnny’s.

“Well,” Mr Suh hesitated, “your mom told me about the exhibition, said it was important for me to be here.” He explained, glancing around the room to avoid making eye contact with Johnny, “Plus...” he added, “I’m always interested in the work you produce.”

Johnny’s mind was reeling slightly. His father was standing right in front of him — obviously exhausted from the journey. For no other reason than because Johnny’s mother, the person who divorced him, had told him about the exhibition. What messed up timeline was this?

Forcing himself to stop gaping, Johnny nodded (somewhat numbly), and led him towards his work.

He busied himself with chatting to the other exhibitors and guests, while his father inspected his work — too anxious to see his reaction.

Ten, on the other hand, watched diligently. Only half involving himself in the discussion, in order to keep one eye on Mr Suh. He watched as he looked over the larger images, reading their titles and taking in their subject matter.

Of course, this meant he also watched as he, eventually, got to the Polaroid’s. Waiting to see how he’d react to the more suggestive shots.

On the outside, Johnny’s dad didn’t show much of a reaction. Eyes flicking over the images before he gave a sharp, but small, nod.

Ten let himself relax a little.

Mr Suh approached them soon after that, patting Johnny on the shoulder. “Well done, John.” He congratulated. “This is very impressive.” He nodded, indicating to the images behind him.

“Thanks, dad.” Johnny offered his own, small but genuine, smile.

“I’ve got to say,” his dad sucked in a breath, eyes finally flicking between Johnny and Ten: “New York City seems good for you. You look... happier.” An unnamed emotion flitted across his features — not anger or disappointment, but maybe something more akin to regret.

It was only there for a second before his normal, neutral, expression was back.

“I am happy.” Johnny confirmed, “I really am. But...” He started, unsure if this was the best way to approach the topic, “can you be happy for me?”

There was a brief pause, his dad mulling over the question before giving another sharp nod: “Yes son, I think...” he stopped, looking for the right words, “just because I might not completely understand it... doesn’t mean I don’t support you. You and Ten.” He added, giving Johnny’s shoulder a squeeze and offering a smile to Ten.

Johnny felt a small weight lift off his shoulders, no longer fearful of what his father thought — he pressed a kiss against Ten’s temple just to prove it. “Well, I’m very glad to hear that.”

He led his father around the rest of the exhibition after that, introducing him to his friends, and witnessing the awkward encounter of both his mom and dad chatting, properly, for the first time in years.

Johnny’s dad hadn’t stuck around for long. Making some excuse about having to rest early for the journey back.

Johnny didn’t care by that point.

He had waved him off with a mock salute, thanking him for coming, but quickly redirecting his attention towards the others.

In particular, Ten.

The younger had been practically attached to his arm for the entire night. Immense pride evident all over his face, and in the way he spoke.

Because of appearing in multiple photographs, many of the exhibition visitors had wanted to talk to him as well. Complimenting his style and praising his modelling ability.

Ten, suddenly becoming very humble, gave all the credit to Johnny: “Ah, thank you,” he would say, smiling as another woman sent kind words in his direction, “but it's all thanks to Johnny, he’s the talent behind these pictures — I’m just another pretty face.”

As soon as these words had left Ten’s lips, Johnny turned to him — forehead creasing. “Ten,” He whispered, once the woman was out of earshot, “you’re so much more than just a ‘pretty face’”

Ten seemed unconvinced, laughing a little too forcefully as Johnny spoke. “You sure about that?”

“Ten,” Johnny said again, running a hand through his boyfriend’s hair before resting it against the nape of his neck, “You’re my inspiration, my muse... I would never want to reduce you to just your looks — you’ve always been more than that.”

At this, Ten finally looked up, properly meeting Johnny’s eyes. There was a warmth in his gaze, smile slightly watery as he leant forward connecting their lips and a deep kiss.

Johnny pushed forward to meet him, allowing Ten’s arms to wrap around his neck and pull him in for more.

There was no desperation, the kiss conveying nothing but warmth and affection. Hand gripping each other’s body’s and pulling them impossibly closer — as if any space between them was too much to bear.

Ten broke the kiss first, pulling away with a watery chuckle to match his smile from before.

They rested their heads together, Ten placing a hand against Johnny’s chest, before running it down to rest against his waist. “I love you, Johnny Suh,” he breathed, finally opening his eyes and allowing them to trace over Johnny’s face, “I love you, so damn much.”

“I love you too, Ten” Johnny leant in for another kiss. Just a quick one — soft press of lips against lips — noses brushing slightly.

“Shit, Ten are you crying?” Yuta piped up — voice far too close for comfort.

The couple pulled apart, both men turning a glare towards their friend. “Fuck off! Can’t I just be proud of my boyfriend?” Ten complained, pouting in Yuta’s direction and dabbing his eyes dramatically.

“Of course you can... however, I have a feeling it was more to do with your little bout of self-doubt, rather than just pride alone...” Taeyong added, apparently having seen a lot of what just went down.

Ten’s face turned a not so subtle shade of red, he let out a sound of frustration and buried his face into Johnny’s chest — to hide the embarrassment he was feeling. Johnny let out a small chuckle, pulling his boyfriend closer by the waist and pressing a kiss against his head. “Don’t listen to them Tennie, you’re perfect,”

The group let out a groan at the cheesiness of his statement — Gem, Dongyoung and Kiya having wandered over to see what the others were fussing about, just before he spoke.

“Everything okay over there?”

“Yeah mom, don’t worry we’re all good,” Johnny assured, rubbing Ten’s back while he directed the group towards her.

“Well, that’s good then. I was thinking, it would be quite nice to get a picture of you all next to your exhibition. If that’s something you’d be interested in?” She asked, waving her phone in the direction of the friends.

They all agreed quickly, making their way over to Johnny display and getting ready to pose.

Just as they were settled, an idea popped into Johnny’s head. “Oh, one second,” he stated, leaving the group with the confused stares of his friends following him.

He returned a couple of seconds later with Mark and the Polaroid camera he had lent him for the evening. “Hey, is it alright if you take a pic of us as well?” He asked, getting back into position by looping an arm around Ten’s neck.

“Sure thing man.” Mark nodded, setting himself up, at the same time as Johnny’s mum lifted her phone once more. “Everyone say cheese!”

The shot was prepared and, in the same fashion as last time, the group moved to pull a more ridiculous pose. To make it better, this time around, Johnny was prepared. Taking the unaware Ten by surprise, by swooping down to press a kiss against his cheek.

Ten yelped, face splitting into a grin before he burst into laughter.

Around them, their friends did similar things, Gem and Kiya blowing kisses at the camera, Yuta and Taeyong throwing hearts and Dongyoung wrapping his arms around both their necks.

The Polaroid developed, and the group were revealed in bright technicolour.

It was everything they could have asked for.

Each of their faces reflecting pure joy. The seven of them standing close, with Johnny’s exhibition in the background.

“It’s perfect,” Ten stated, leaning into Johnny’s side as the group looked up at one another.

Johnny couldn’t agree more, eyes tracing over the image in front of them.

It really was perfect. It depicted everything New York City had become for Johnny: comfortable, fun, familiar, and more importantly: home.

One year ago, Johnny had been desperate for escape, seeking a chance to change things — a chance to change who he was. New York City had given him that. But, it had also given him so much more. And, as he stood there, surrounded by his newfound family, in a city that he felt more at home in than he had for the last six years, Johnny was filled with the overwhelming feeling that  _ this _ was all he ever needed.

“Thank you so much, guys,” he whispered, pulling them all in for a group hug. “Thank you, for making all of this possible.”

There were murmured replies, each member pushing further into the embrace — finding comfort in each other as they always did.

When Johnny moved to New York City, he wasn’t looking for much: inspiration, opportunity, a chance to find himself...

What he wasn’t expecting was to fall in love.

Fall in love with the city, fall in love with his close-knit group of friends, fall in love with a beautiful stranger.

But sometimes, these things just happen.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we’re done!! 
> 
> I started writing this fic, when I was mid way through my last one. It was supposed be a way to take my mind off my wip. 
> 
> My plan was to write a 20-30k one shot, but some how I ended up writing my longest fic yet oops
> 
> I debated for a while wether I should post it, or even finish it, but I’m really glad I did. 
> 
> Thank you so much, to everyone who’s read this and to everyone that’s left kudos or comments while I’ve been posting the chapters, it really kept me motivated!! 
> 
> As always, I want to apologise for any spelling or grammatical mistakes that may have appeared throughout this fic, and thank you for putting up with my messy writing style. 
> 
> I really hope you enjoyed reading, thank you for sticking through it!! 
> 
> Kudos and comments are highly appreciated <3
> 
> See you in the next one~~
> 
> [Edit] 
> 
> And another big thank you to Teeg for continuing to be my beta!!


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